See You At Midnight
by avesbellator
Summary: Set back in the Quarter Quell after the beach scene in Catching Fire. What if Peeta agreed to run away with Katniss that night when she asked him to? What if they never lost track of one another during the last few moments in the arena? Would they both end up in the Capital, or would the rebels rescue them in time? A concept I’ve been pondering over-a lot of “what ifs”
1. Chapter One: The Escape

**Author's Note: Hey everyone! This is a story I've been pondering over for a while, yet I haven't actually begun to write it until now! Let me know how you guys like it! Sorry for a shorter chapter, just kind of an intro to the story. I promise that it won't be just Katniss and Peeta telling the story, I want to incorporate Finnick and Johanna too if I can! Also I forgot to mention, Everlark fluff for you all fans of KatnissPeeta. Please read and review!**

 **Katniss's POV**

"Peeta... I think we need to go." I admit to him in a quiet voice, rolling his gift, the silver pearl, between my sandy fingers. His eyes shift over to our allies, who are speaking to one another a few feet away from us. His sapphire eyes flutter back to my face.

"I don't want to be the one who fires the first shot. It's best if we just get away from them." I continue. I can sense my trust in Finnick and the others is slowly building, but at the end of this Peeta needs to walk away unharmed. I can't take any chances with staying here longer.

"But Katniss, what about Beetee's plan? I thought we'd help. Besides... where would we run off to?" Peeta asks, his hand creeping along the sand to mine. I grab hold to it tight to add affect for the cameras. I frown, my eyes tracing the cornucopia and the jungle in the distance behind it.

"If we stay out of the certain areas within the known hours, we should be okay. It's only the two of us and _them_ who know about the clock." I side glance at our group.

"Peeta... you and I know that by the end of this they _will_ kill us to win. We can't take any chances. After the remaining tributes get electrified on the beach, it will come down to the five of us."

Peeta lets out a small sigh, his eyes scanning our intertwined fingers as he thinks through this.

"Okay, we'll go, but it needs to be when either you or I take watch. It'll end in a bloodbath for sure if they spot us leaving." Peeta replies, his thumb tracing one of my knuckles. I nod.

"We have to also make sure we go at the high tide, otherwise they'll see-" I'm cut off by the loud voice of Johanna Mason, who spots us whispering.

"What are you two chatting about?" She scoffs, throwing her axe into the sand for the hundredth time. My breath hitches as I start to panic on how to reply, but Peeta pulls me in for a kiss. His grainy hands caress my neck as I deepen the kiss to make Johanna leave us alone. An "ew" from her satisfies the two of us. I hope that we weren't overheard.

"Otherwise they'll see what?" Peeta's lips tickle my ear as our foreheads touch.

"Our footprints." I mutter in reply.

The stars gradually appear in the sky with their twinkling glint as we all spread out on the edge of the jungle where its trees meet the white sand. Peeta and I agreed to leave just before ten o'clock as not to interfere with Beetee's still ongoing plan. When they see us gone, they will just have to continue without us. Although, I still feel a tinge if guilt in betraying them when they are counting on us to help.

 _You're doing this for Peeta. Nobody can live, except him._

Peeta offers to take the watch just like we had planned. Johanna gives the two of us a glare with her dark eyes, but turns over on her side to rest. Finnick seems to suspect nothing and yawns, showing off his perfect teeth.

"Wake me in two hours." He replies, stretching his tan arms over his bronze head. He rolls over and pulls his trident close to him. Though we won't be here to. The moment they fall asleep we leave them.

I lay on my back beside Peeta. He leans against one of the many mossy trees on the verge of the beach, playing his part in taking watch. I pretend to rest, yet my eyes keep shifting over at Beetee, who is sketching his plan on the sand with a spare twig. I hear him mutter a few times, twisting the tightly round coil in his hands. Finnick's quiet snores assure me, and Johanna stops squirming in her sleeping spot after a certain time. I bite my lip, squinting over at Beetee. Peeta and I wait for him painfully, hoping that he'll go to sleep before Finnick awakes for the next watch. He at last slips into his dreams, his glasses sliding off his nose.

Hoping that Peeta won't make too much noise with his loud feet as we try to escape, I slide up from my sleeping position. I slip my sheath over my right shoulder and tuck my bow under my arm. I take Peeta's outstretched hand and he pulls me to my feet. I glance over at the silver spile, laying near Johanna's axe.

"Peeta... should we let them keep it?" I breath.

"Um... do you want to die of thirst?" He replies, though I can see it in his eyes that he's not sure either. I shake my head, only one can survive. Bracing myself, I lean over and snatch it from the ground, tucking it into my waterproof suit.

"Ready?" I whisper.

"Yeah, let's get out of here."

Making our way to the very edge of the water, we carefully run along the beach. Peeta's feet slightly splash behind me and I pray that it doesn't wake the others. We reach the blood rain section of the arena and enter into the jungle, running much faster than before now. The farther we get away from that beach, the better.


	2. Chapter Two: Good Morning

**Finnick's POV**

The sun's bright light awakens me and I realize something is wrong immediately. Squinting in the bright light, I sit up quickly.

 _It's morning._

"Hey Peeta, you didn't wake me for my turn to take watch." My voice sounding groggily from sleep. I search for him in his spot by the mossy tree. It's vacant and so is the place where Katniss was sleeping. _Oh god, where are they?_

"What the hell? We slept till morning?" Johanna practically screams, jumping up from her position. Her eyes flashing with pure anger as she chucks her axe across the beach. I dodge it absentmindedly.

"Shit!" She cries, kicking the sand.

"We weren't woken up for the plan! Beetee, the coil-the tree-"

"I am aware." He responds calmly, wiping his glasses.

"Katniss and Peeta are gone." Beetee glances up at us, still sitting in the wet sand.

"Our plan fell through because they left."

"Great! Well that's just wonderful isn't it? What were we thinking in trusting them? You could see it on their smug Twelve faces that they didn't give a shit about us!" Johanna rants, practically stomping her feet in frustration. Though I know her concern goes much deeper. Haymitch made us sware to watch over the both of them, yet Katniss and Peeta suspicions made them leave last night. We couldn't convince them to trust us. We've failed part of our mission.

"God, this completely ruins everything! The moment I saw them whispering to each other, I knew something was up! Why, it's my fault that I didn't bother to give a fu-"

"Johanna! Calm down, okay? We should have seen this coming. It was niave of us to think that they'd not do something stupid. All they are thinking about is keeping each other alive." My thoughts go back to the time Peeta got hit by the forcefeild. Of course Katniss would decide to leave, especially if she thought it would protect Peeta from us.

"Don't worry Johanna... are plan is not wasted. Nobody else knows about the coil and the tree except for Katniss and Peeta. Our plan can still be completed." Beetee says in a calming voice, still stroking his precious coil.

I shake my head. This was so careless of us. Haymitch and Plutarch must be furious watching us right now-this screws up the entire plan. The two star crossed lovers of District Twelve have left us. With both of their trackers still embedded in their arms.

"I'm getting water." Johanna announces after a moment of silence between the three of us. She trudges over to the place where she threw her axe. I lick my lips as I think of breakfast at that moment. They taste salty and chapped. I snatch up my trident from the damp sand. Just as I'm about to enter the outskirts of the jungle to look for some tree rats, Johanna goes on one of her shrieking rages again.

"And those sneaky dirty rats took our spile as well! Why do _they_ even bother?" Her eyes flash up to the sky to silently curse the people behind our plan to start a rebellion. "This is _never_ going to work. We'll die from thirst before we even have the chance to-"

" _Johanna_." I say in a stern tone. She's already on the edge of blowing our cover. Her big mouth may ruin this entire operation. If President Snow and the other gamemakers find out what we are up to-we're dead and so is everyone we love. I can't risk that. I can't risk my Annie.

Plutarch chose Katniss and Peeta to lead the rebellion... even if they are selfish traitors who stole our easy chance at water.

"There are other ways to get water. C'mon-let's search in the trees." I say, slamming my trident into one of the mossy ones. I'll make the trees bleed water if I have to.

By the time we return to our place at the beach, I sense the concern between Beetee and Johanna growing. If our plan is to continue, we need to somehow create the _occasion_ to meet up with Katniss and Peeta again. With somehow our intention to look as though we _want_ to kill them. I glance back down at the intertwined gold bangle hanging off my wrist.

 _"If all else fails, tell her to remember who the real enemy is."_

Haymitch's last words to me before we parted that evening before the start of the games. Katniss's weakest spot in the arena is Peeta-I understand that now. After Peeta made contact with the force field and lost consciousness, I knew that she really did care for him. Even if I didn't know in what way. Yet, her resistance against Snow is strong. In the end she'll fight against the Capital if she has to. Katniss knows that in the end _he_ is the real enemy, and we just need to prove it to her.

"Where did you think they went?" I ask tentatively, twisting my trident in my hand. I try to sound completely casual. Johanna cocks up her eyebrow.

"Perhaps they're _cuddling_ in another cave?" She smirks. I roll my eyes, we both know they aren't doing that. The Victors all realize that it's just an act.

"My guess would be that they are seeking shelter in the safest part of the arena, not including the beach." Beetee suggests, keeping his voice mellow, making sure not to sound the slightest bit curious.

I nod.

"Let's continue with our plan then." I say, switching topics as to not sound attached to the tributes from Twelve. We must show the gamemakers that we don't care they left, that we'll just kill them the next time we meet.

"Tonight, at midnight?" I ask Beetee, looking off into the distance at the tall twisted tree erected above the jungle just at the twelve o'clock mark.

"Yes... at midnight." Beetee confirms, adjusting his glasses on his nose.

I nod to the two of them, then sling my trident over my right shoulder.

"Be back soon with breakfast." I say, though not looking back as I head into the trees.


	3. Chapter Three: Liquid Fire

**Peeta's POV**

Just as the hour strikes, I complete our little fort with the last clumps of mud I've created from the soil of the jungle and it's water running inside the veins of the trees. Katniss nods in approval at my creation.

"That should keep us from the most of it." She brushes her messy dark hair with the back of her hand as she pears up into the sky. _Drip_. A thick droplet of blood splatters onto her forehead.

"Better get inside." I say, ushering her into our fort with my hand on the small of her back. We crouch under the large leaves and sticks covering us. Blood Rain is the least of our problems in the arena.

It's been about twelve hours since our departure from our ex allies. We traveled through the night, dodging the certain sections filled with different horrors until we settled here in the Blood Rain wedge of the jungle. Katniss and I decided that it would be best to rest here for a while. The redness now pouring from the sky may be utterly disgusting and hot and blinding when you wander aimlessly in it, but if you make a shelter it doesn't create much damage upon it's victims.

I glance over at Katniss, who sits cross legged on the earthy service of the ground, watching the blood shower upon the jungle outside like liquid fire. I spot the drip of the stuff slipping down her forehead and into her eyebrow. Taking my thumb, I wipe it away for her.

She turns to face me.

"Do you think it's real?" She asks, looking down at my hand darkened by the blood.

I consider this for a moment.

"Yes." I answer. I don't know how, but I do think it is real. The thought makes me sick to my stomach. I think Katniss feels the same way, for she looks away from the red outside and up at our leaf and twig fort.

"The hour should be up soon. Then, we should search for something to eat." I try to assure her. Im guessing it's nearly two o'clock.

"Yeah, if none of the animals have drowned in this." She replies with a scowl.

I am correct soon enough. The rain clears and the forest somehow obtains the green again even though I can see hints of the fiery color trickling down tree trunks and between moss covered rocks. We catch sight of one of the ugly tree rats dangling from a branch a few feet away from us. I stand respectfully back as Katniss shoots, letting her do what she does best and take care of the rodent.

We cook it over a mellow fire in a dry spot near our camp and stuff ourselves with the fatfilled meat.

"I think we need to start searching... for some of the other tributes." Katniss suggests after we lick all the nutrients off of the rat's bones.

"Okay."

I understand. She wants to get this over with. It can't be like the last games where we hide from everyone until the last moments in the arena. We have to play this like the Careers.

"Who do we know is still out there? Besides, you know-the others." Katniss says, plucking the string of her sleek bow with her thin fingers. I find myself admiring the detail of them. The lines and the calluses that have formed while we've been here. The way her fingernails are shaped and the tiny cuts along the inside of her palms and wrists. I snap myself out of my trace.

"Who is still out there?" I repeat her question.

"Well, there's Enobaria, and maybe Brutus?"

"And don't forget Chaff. I didn't see him in the sky last night." Katniss says, throwing the remains of the rat into the fire.

"So that's three, plus Finnick, Johanna, and Beetee." I conclude, standing up to stomp upon the fire to put it out.

"Do you think they'll still continue with their plan to electrocute the beach? I know we probably postponed it last night unless they woke up before morning." Katniss stares up at me with her beautiful silver eyes.

"I think so. There's no reason why they wouldn't." I answer, placing myself beside her. She scoots over and rests her head on my shoulder. A smile creeps up my face. I know that everything is just for the cameras, but I still like being alone with Katniss. I reach up to stroke her dark thick hair. Katniss frowns, as if she's pondering over something.

"We should wait it out tonight..." she begins slowly.

"And listen for a canon to sound around midnight. If we don't, I say we start looking for the others."

"Okay." I agree. If Finnick and the others can't finish off Enobaria, Chaff, and Brutus; then we'll do it ourselves.

"Then all that's left is Finnick, Johanna, and Beetee." Katniss says.

"And then you go home a Victor." I whisper into her hair. She lifts up her head from my shoulder. She opens her mouth as if to say something, but then closes it and shakes her head. I reach up to touch her cheek.

"Katniss..."

"No. I need you." She breathes.

"But _they_ need _you_." I reply, touching the pedant hanging around me. Unclasping it from my neck, I lift up her hair to place it on her. A tear from one of her eyes drops onto the back of my hand. For a moment I am shocked. Is she really crying over this? Over _me_? I hadn't really realized how much I meant to her until I woke up with her staring down at my face after I was thrown back from the force field. Her cheeks were red and blotchy and the look of helplessness was upon her face, but then the wave of utter relief rushed over her when I told her that I was alright. I know she somehow cares for me, but... could she possibly _love_ me? I wouldn't dare to ask her, but it is a certain comfort in thinking _maybe_ , just maybe she could. And that gives me the courage to wrap her in my arms, pulling her close to me.

"I-I can't leave you." She sputters into my chest.

"I know."

"I'll never be the same without you." She whispers, clutching the hem of my tight wetsuit.

I nod, tightening our embrace as I watch the light of the fire fade into ashes.

 _If Katniss really does care for me like I believe she does, then that is even more of a reason to die for her in the arena._


	4. Chapter Four: Searching For The Lovers

**Johanna's POV**

I think my throat is permanently dry from all the screaming I've done today. I've yelled none stop at both of them. Beetee _and_ Finnick. I can't help it. This plan _has_ to work and I'm pissed that we've already screwed up half of it. Who knows where Katniss and Peeta the _pathetic and fake_ lovers of Twelve have disappeared to?

Yesterday evening Finnick suggested that we postpone our plan to electrocute the beach longer then before and I sware I nearly had an aneurism.

 _Are you freaking serious?_

The quicker we slaughter the people that don't matter and break out of this bloody arena, the better. Yet, _he_ explained that _if_ somehow Katniss and Peeta wandered back to the beach, we could accidentally kill them without knowing it. Yeah, like they'd be dumb enough to return to the beach, but Finnick insisted upon it.

It was kind of difficult to understand what he was getting at. Our signals and clues have become sloppy. It's as hard as hell to try to communicate with one another if we wish to share something that the gamemakers can't hear. Volts and I understood him soon enough though. We have to find the location of the two of them first before taking any more chances.

This is totally fine other that the fact that we probably look _incredibly_ suspicious to the gamemakers. Our original plan to electrify the remaining tributes on the beach is much more convincing then trying to locate and "kill" two people who are _where_? We have no clue. Whatever, we will most likely die before we find Katniss and Peeta anyway with the way we are traveling through the jungle right now. I think Beetee is about five miles behind Finnick and I.

"A few more steps this way and we should reach the jabberjay section of the jungle. I assume I'm correct checking my calculations from the beach to here." Beetee explains as he strides to catch up with Finnick and I as we stumble through a particular thick part of the jungle.

Finnick pales slightly.

"Oh, jabberjays? I thought we decided to enter the blood rain wedge?" Finnick scratches his head, looking nervously at Beetee. I shrug at the both of them.

"What does it matter?"

"It's just that-that I uh, don't think they'd be there. Katniss and Peeta." Finnick explains, plucking nervously at the wrist of his wetsuit. I can sort of tell that it may be more than that. Finnick freaked out when we entered the jabberjay part of the arena last time, thinking that his _Annie_ was being tortured to her death. Not to mention Katniss reacted in a similar way as well. I wouldn't be surprised if he chickened out on going in there.

"Okay..." Beetee begins.

"It's fine Finnick. Let's go this way." I tell him, pointing over to the left. There is no point in making things more difficult for us.

"You're right. They are probably not over there." I say, pulling my hand through my damp hair as drips of sweat trickle down into my eyes.

Finnick gives me a grateful look. I nod at him and then begin to lead the way, cutting through thick vines with my axe. Finnick follows closely behind and then Volts, who drags his coil along with him.

We try to approach each grouping of trees quietly and with caution, as if haunting for prey. Though, we really are just trying to find the star-crossed lovers without startling them. When they see us they'll try to fight us for sure, which is why we must be careful not to appear violent. Finnick explained to me that our goal is just keep them away from the beach until midnight so we can electrocute the others. I just hope we can find them first...

The cracking of a twig makes the three of us jump. I whip around to see Finnick pointing his trident at Brutus and Enobaria who are inching around the large trunk of a tree.

 _Great, we've got company._

"Greetings to you two." Finnick says cooly, the corners of his mouth upturned in a slight grin. Brutus, nearly an _animal_ , growls in reply.

"Let's make this quick Odair." Enobaria hisses, all of her razor sharp teeth showing.

"Agreed." He answers, plunging his trident towards the two of them. I flip around my axe, bounding over to them. Brutus bares his knives clutched in his thick hands, ready to strike at me. I kick at his legs, tripping him onto his stomach, then holding him down with my foot to try and hit him with my axe. As I am about to wedge my blade into his large head, he slices his knife across my ankle. I give out a cry of pain, furious as he escapes from my grasp, slipping out from under my foot and whirling around at me.

One of his knives fly at me, I dodge it and pull behind one of the trees. He starts to come at me from one side of the trunk, but I complete the circle and sneak up behind him, slamming my axe deep into his back. He crumbles to the ground. I yank my weapon out of him as blood splatters across my face.

 _Disgusting_.

I wipe it away from my cheek. A canon goes off from up above, marking my kill. Finnick chases Enobaria into the bushes as they continue to fight and I find Beetee leaning against another trunk, his upper arm deeply cut. I make my way over to him to check how bad it is.

"Are you-"

A rustling comes from my right, and I flip around to find Finnick returning from chase, doubled over and breathing heavily.

"I injured her, but-she-she got away." He heaves, slinging his trident over his shoulder and wiping his sweaty brow.

"Let's get out of here before she returns."


	5. Chapter Five: The Force Field

**Katniss's POV**

No canon fired last night. Not the slightest sound was made as we slept other than the rustling of Peeta and I under our fort and the blood rain showering the trees from one to two o'clock. Oh and let's not forget the slight scurrying of tree rats across the branches.

Dawn approaches soon enough, and I happen to be the one to take watch before morning so I have the chance to see the disoriented sun behind the paneled force field rise up into the sky from the east. I glance over at Peeta sleeping beside me. His hands are folded across his stomach and his head rests on my sheath. My eyes flicker up to his face. He's not restless for once as he dreams. His eyes are shut firmly and his nose slightly twitches. Almost a smile traces on his lips.

I frown. My thoughts wonder back to yesterday when he tried to pursuade me yet again to go home a _second_ time Victor and leave him here to die in the arena. The thought of losing him had caught me off guard when I imagined myself for one second doing what he wished for, but I quickly pulled away from that dangerous consideration. Though, I hope my reaction made him feel guilty about his idea to die for me. I'll take any chance I can get to change his mind.

"Peeta." I shift his positioned arm laying on top of his waist. His eyes almost immediately flutter open. I find myself gazing down at his ocean colored eyes.

"Hmm?"

"It's morning." I respond. He nods.

"Are you doing okay?" Peeta sits up, stiffly turning his neck from side to side.

"Of course." I reply. All he does is worry about me.

"Did you sleep alright?" I ask him.

"Sure. I got in a couple of hours." He answers with a small smile.

I return the gesture before looking up at the towering trunks above us.

"No canon."

"No canon." Peeta echoes. That leaves us with our next option.

"Time to be Careers, I guess." I shrug, standing up and snatching my bow from the ground.

"Do you think we'll get a better view of the beach by climbing the trees? If Finnick and the others haven't left for their plan, then they probably stayed." I say, pulling my hair around my shoulder to pluck out a few stray twigs and leaves.

"I don't see why not." Peeta answers, his eyes following down my hair. Carefully, he plucks out a dead leaf for me.

Making a short distance to the tallest tree we can find, I slip my bow over my shoulders next to my sheath. Gripping the slick bark of the tree, I hoist myself up onto the first branch.

"Be careful." Peeta calls out from below. I half laugh as I move on to the next part of my climb.

"I'll be fine. I'm the climber of the two of us, remember?" I reply, shifting my weight onto another branch.

"I just don't want you to fall." He yells up at me. I want to roll my eyes and call back that of course I won't, but then I remember. Peeta and I are both playing this for the cameras. He, unlike myself, hasn't forgotten that I'm supposed to be pregnant.

I smile down at him in return, hoping the cameras can see my expression. I then continue upwards. Every so often I look over my shoulder to see Peeta's blonde head get smaller and smaller as I climb higher. His arms are slightly forward, as if he is spotting me in case I were to _actually_ fall. I shake my head. Even he couldn't save me from this height.

At last I break through the last of the leaves and vines. The sun brightens my face as I look out across the tree line. Straight ahead and then a little bit to the right I find the white sands of the beach and then the glimmer of the cornucopia planted in the middle, surrounded by the body of water. Strangely, it remains deserted. No one has seemed to set foot upon the sand. That means our ex allies have left. Did they go searching for us? Are they making their way to the lightning tree? Where are they? If they are not there, then why hasn't anybody else come to claim it?

I frown. My gaze follows from the lightning tree up into the vast force field inclosing us like a cage. If I stare at it long enough, I can see the ripple along the panels. I remember what Beetee had explained to me in training. There's always a flaw in the system. Even in the arena, the force field soaks up all the energy. It takes _to_ much of it.

Taking a chance, I pull one of my arrows out of my sheath. Connecting it with the bow, I fire it up into the sky. Watching it fly, I hear a dim bang come from the connection between the arrow and the invisible panels. The force field ripples, yet my arrow doesn't penetrate it. I bite my lip, pondering this.

What would happen if the arrow _did_ brake through?

My thoughts are interrupted by Peeta's voice calling my name out from below.

"Coming!" I yell down to him. I slip underneath the brush again and slide down each thick branch. I come into Peeta's view and he smiles. I know he's relieved that I'm back.

"See anything?" He asks me, holding out his hand to help me down from the last part of the tree. I politely take it and hop down to the floor of the arena.

"Nobody's on the beach." I say to him. His eyebrows furrow.

"I wonder why-" I small moan sounds from some grouping of plants nearby us. Peeta's head whips around and I have an arrow loaded in the speed of light.

A dark head appears and a silver sword clatters into view from the thicket of bushes.

Enobaria.

Her eyes spot us and a moment of surprise appears on her face. She wasn't expecting to see the two of us, but then her expression slowly changes to a sly smirk. She looks the two of us over, as if she knows something we don't.

"I'd thought you'd be with the others." She whispers. I pull back my arrow tighter. Peeta attempts to gently push me behind him, but I ignore his gesture, hoping to get in front of _him_ instead.

"No. We abandoned them a long time ago." Peeta answers bitterly. Enobaria chuckles, but then she winces. She grabs her leg. My eyes flicker to three large punctures sunk deep into her thigh. Blood seeps from the wound and her foot twitches slightly as she presses her weight onto her good one.

 _Only one weapon could have caused that. Finnick's._

Peeta notices the punctures as well, for he lowers his arm pulled in front of me.

Enobaria glares at the two of us.

"Just because I'm hurt doesn't mean I can't kill the both of you." She hisses, though I can almost hear the terror in her voice. She knows she's outnumbered. Yet, she's still going to try and fight. Her gaze moves towards her thick sword laying in the dirt. I raise my bow a bit higher, aiming it at her throat.

Peeta nods.

"Okay... try it." He encourages her, though I can almost hear a laugh build up in his throat. She's going to bleed to death even if she does kill us somehow. Enobaria lunges for her weapon.

 _She's going to aim it at Peeta!_

I convince myself. Thinking fast, I release the arrow. It flies into the air and lodges itself deep into the pocket between her two collars bones. Her body hits the ground with a thud. She lays there with a look of shock and fear played upon her face. My eyes widen. Realizing what I've just committed, I step backwards in horror. Stumbling upon the roots of the tall tree I had just climbed up, I fall to the ground. I just murdered someone who was vulnerable and injured. Someone who didn't even have a fair fight against us.

Peeta rushes over to me, his hand on my arm.

"Hey, are you okay? She's dead. She's gone." He tries to assure me. I just shake my head at him.

"I know, I-I killed her." My voice strains. I've killed people in the games before, of course, but this feels different. Those people were armed and ready to attack me. Enobaria barely fended for herself.

 _What is Snow turning me into?_

"Katniss, you had to." He says, rubbing my arm.

"It's okay... she wasn't going to live."

I stiffly nod, shakily getting up and brushing myself off.

 _You thought she was going to hurt Peeta. You had to do it._

I tell myself. My heart rate eventually slows down and I tuck back my loose strains of hair nervously.

"Sorry." I mutter to Peeta.

He reaches up to stroke my cheek. It may be just for the cameras, but I'm grateful for his comfort.

"Let's get moving. Remember, we've got to be the last ones left." He reminds me.

 _Right. The others must die if Peeta is to live._

"Okay."

 **A/N: Yes, I am aware Katniss has technically already fired the arrow at the force field when she was with Finnick and the others before the decision with the plan and so on, but of course I rearranged this part. Hope you all enjoyed this story so far!**


	6. Chapter Six: Lightning Strikes

**Finnick's POV**

Beetee's gash doesn't seem too terrible when I wrap it up using a ripped piece of my wetsuit. The bleeding has stopped and the cut isn't going to need stitches in the near future. The moment I tie him up, we all keep moving. There can be no chance of us meeting up with Enobaria again. I'm not sure how bad I injured her with my trident, she may still be able to follow us, even with her leg.

We trample across two more wedges in the jungle, and just barely miss the tsunami as it hits at approximately ten o'clock. At last, we stumble upon the lightning tree standing crooked, yet tall and towering over the jungle.

I realize that I've been moving at a pretty fast pace, for Johanna and Beetee come staggering after me. They are both out of breath and slump against the same mossy tree.

"Sorry. Don't wanna get caught up over there." I say, looking over Johanna's head.

Johanna coughs as she doubles over to catch her breath, giving me a thumbs up in reply just as I see the invisible barrier go up behind us. Disgusting insects swarm about at the eleven o'clock hour. We made it just in time.

"Finnick... we've searched the entire south side of the arena... let's take a break here." Johanna breathes, sinking down into the dirt below her. I nod. We have been looking for them all morning. There is only so much we can do for Plutarch. They've run off somewhere, and there is really nothing we can do to stop them at this point. Our best hope is that they happen to come across _our_ path.

I slam my trident into another tree so it oozes out water for us. It takes a good couple of swings before a slight drizzle comes out. This would be so much easier with the spile. Beetee and Johanna take turns slurping the water off of the bark of the tree and then I place my face under the gaping hole.

"Even if we don't see Katniss and Peeta today, we'll be able to see wether or not they made it into the sky..." Beetee explains thoughtfully, his eyes looking up.

"That's true..." They either live through today or they don't. And there is no way any of us can control what happens to them now.

Dark clouds begin to form over the lightning tree, for the clock will soon hit twelve. Johanna, Beetee, and I place ourselves behind a particular wide tree as the lighting cuts across the trees' branches. We peak around it to see how much damage it causes, but are surprised to find no blackened tree bark and no smoke forming from around the roots. The lightning tree causes no horror to those near it, but only marks the twelve o'clock hour.

By the late afternoon, we decide to set up camp-right next to the tree. If we do somehow find Katniss and Peeta, we can bring them here and continue with our plan to electrocute whoever has decided to place themselves on the beach. When will we do that? We have no idea. Our only wish is to see that Katniss and Peeta's faces don't appear in the sky tonight.


	7. Chapter Seven: Glistening Water

**Peeta's POV**

I side glance every once in a while at Katniss as we push ourselves through the trees. I know she still feels some guilt about killing Enobaria. It concerns me to see her always take her killings so personally, because I don't want death always servicing her mind all of the time. I'm not saying that I'm _not_ a hypocrite in this circumstance, for I've suffered over killing others in the games many times before. I just don't want her to have another burden to carry.

Katniss turns left and then cuts in front of me to pull apart some stray vines, revealing the beach. After the twelve o'clock hour hit, Katniss and I decided it would be best to return to the beach. It worried us how close Finnick, Johanna, and Beetee were to us when we realized who had injured Enobaria. I'm sure they are making their way to the lightning tree, because the Blood Rain section is only one hour away from twelve o'clock. I am almost certain now that they are going to continue with their plan by midnight tonight. Katniss and I will leave the beach once it becomes dark. Strangely, I can since it. The end to these games is near now.

Our feet make deep prints into the sand as we finally reach the water. It glistens in the afternoon sun and seems to welcome us with open arms. Katniss, without hesitatation, wades all the way in. We haven't washed ourselves off since... I can't remember. Following her, I do the same. I duck my head under the waves and squint to open my eyes. Everything is blurry and the water slightly burns my eyes, but it feels relieving all the same.

I emerge to find Katniss massaging water into her hair and cupping handfuls to wash over her face. I am caught staring when she shoots me a quizzical look. I avert my eyes with a smile and copy her.

As we clean ourselves, I feel a flick of water hit my face as Katniss's hair whips around as she takes out her braid. Feeling oddly mischievous, I casually spray some water her way. I see her eyes side glance at me, but she ignores my gesture. This only makes me want to tease her more, because without thinking I take a huge handful of water and dump it over her head.

"Peeta!" She practically screams, her eyes wide with shock. I laugh hysterically and grab her around the waist, pulling us both down under the water. She struggles from my grasp and comes up coughing, which soon turns into a laugh as well. Though, I can tell that she is somewhat angry for the whole thing. Pushing the water towards me, she splashes my face in return, giggling uncontrollably.

"You're going to pay!" I exclaim, swimming after her. She smirks and wades away from me quickly. I bound after her as water sprays everywhere.

Katniss's feet reach the sand and she tries to scrabble away, but I catch her forearm. She attempts to yank away with such force that we both end up collapsing on the wet sand. She falls on top of me, her sparkling eyes gazing down at mine. My heart races as I realize how close are bodies are pressed together, and the fact that her arms wrap tightly around my neck. Yet, she doesn't seem to notice. Her cheeks blush deeply and she is grinning more than I have ever seen her. I lean forward to kiss her cheek.

Soon the smile fades though, I can see it in her eyes that her thoughts are drifting elsewhere. She remembers that we are still in the Quarter Quell and that only one of us can survive. There can never be just the two of us. Without any troubles, without any danger, without being stuck in the spotlight of the Capital.

Katniss gently slides off of me. She clears her throat a tad before deciding to set out her bow and sheath to dry in the sun. My heart aches for her. If only things could be different. I sit up and brush the sand off of my wetsuit before following her.

"Do you want to head to the lightning tree tonight? I was thinking... if they happen to be there like we think, we could get this over with." Katniss says quietly, setting herself on the ground. I sit beside her.

"Yes. I think we should go there." The sooner the others are killed, the sooner Katniss gets back to District Twelve. I haven't even begun to consider how I'm going to play on _my_ death. Katniss isn't going to kill me-I know that already. I just need to find a way to escape from her sight to commit the act.

It hasn't dawned on me until now what it will be like when I die. Will I be scared? How will I do it? Will I actually be _able_ to do it? ... I think I will. I believe I can do anything for Katniss. It will hurt me much less to die rather than to watch her die instead.

"Peeta... what happens if they aren't at the lightning tree like we think?" Katniss asks me. I turn to her.

"If they aren't, we'll see them eventually. The gamemakers will have to force us all together at some point." I answer, my thoughts thinking back to the 74th games. I'd rather not be here for the finale with whatever the gamemakers have up their sleeves. The quicker these games go by, the better.


	8. Chapter Eight: Blood and Trackers

**Johanna's POV**

"Chaff is on the beach." Finnick confirms, his voice coming from up high in a tree.

"Okay!" I shout up. He was bound to turn up at the deserted beach at some point. I hesitate.

"What about the lovebirds?" I ask him. Finnick glances down at Beetee and I, his eyes flashing with something unsaid. He shakes his head.

"No sign of them." He replies, swinging down from one of the branches.

 _Good_. I think. It's time to finish the last tribute off. Thank God, it's almost over. We'll at last be rescued from this eternal cage of hell.

Beetee circles around the lightning tree, weaving his coil around and around it. He tightens it to the trunk at the end and pulls the trail of wire over to me. I grip the handle of the spool. It weighs heavy in my hands.

"Okay, Johanna, you take the spool down to the beach. Place it in the water, just like we talked about." Beetee explains.

"Then book it back here before twelve o'clock." Finnick adds, nodding over to the tree.

"Got it." I answer. Beetee's eyes follow up the lightning tree, checking one last time to make sure the wire is woven around tight enough. After a moment, he unnaturally sucks in his breath. His eyes flicker over to a shadowy place up in the jungle canopy. Finnick forms a crease between his eyebrows.

"What is it?" He whispers, his voice so quiet that it's sounds almost like a rustle in the wind. Beetee slowly turns his head towards us.

"I think we're being watched." He mouths. I swallow, searching for a face in the covered trees. A glimpse of blonde hair catches the moonlight... followed by a pair of bright grey eyes, practically silver. Katniss and Peeta. They've found us at last. I wonder how long they've been watching us? I am surprised Katniss hasn't embedded us with one of her arrows yet.

Beetee and Finnick freeze, their faces petrified with fear as they are unsure how to play this. Unlike the two of them, I decide to edge a step forward.

"Glad you two caught up with us." I say with a frown, folding my arms, my axe in one hand and my small knife in the other. Katniss's dark head pokes out from the shadows. She glares down at the three of us. Peeta emerges too. My eyes flicker over to Finnick as if to ask what we should do. He grips his trident tightly, but then allows it to fall to the ground with a thud.

 _No!_

I clench my teeth to stop myself from protesting. I know we aren't supposed to _kill_ the tributes from twelve, but that doesn't mean I'm just going to drop my weapons for them. Sorry guys, I'm not planning on dying in here. Besides, I need _something_ to cut out those trackers in their arms. I think Finnick has forgotten that Katniss and Peeta can't be tracked by the Capital if we want to get them out of here.

Katniss loads her bow, but Finnick raises his hands to show he has nothing else to hide.

"Katniss wait! Please, can we talk about this-"

"Talk about what?" She scoffs, slithering down from the tree. There is determination in her eyes as she stares us down, she isn't going to back away. Peeta follows her close behind, his hand gripping the handle of his sword.

Katniss's angry gaze flickers over to Finnick's trident resting on the ground.

"Pick up your weapon." She demands, her voice catching. Her eyes shift from him to the trident. She doesn't understand his motives. Finnick shakes his head.

"Can we first speak to the both of you?" Finnick says. Peeta steps forward.

"Speak with us? Like what, we hold hands and sing the Panem anthem together and then you stab us in the chests? Yeah, I don't think so." Peeta answers, raising his sword. Katniss keeps her bow aimed at Finnick.

"No, it's- it's not like that." Finnick stammers. This is not going as planned. What the _hell_ are we doing right now? They clearly don't trust us. No matter what Finnick tries to say, they won't understand.

 _It's better to play it their way._ I think to myself

 _I need to cut out that tracker._

My eyes target Katniss's forearm. Without warning the others, I charge after her. Finnick yells for me to stop, and Katniss's arrow goes wizzing across the jungle. Katniss and I tumble onto the ground as she kicks and screams, attempting to push me off. Spit sprays at my face and her knees jam painfully into my stomach. Peeta's fingers scratch at my back as he tries to pull me off of her. I grit my teeth, forcing Katniss harder into the ground.

"Get off of her! Don't touch her!" Peeta cries.

"Peeta! Peeta, you have to stop!" Finnick yells as Peeta forces his fist into my back. I cry out in pain, but I don't give up on holding Katniss down.

I hear weapons clatter behind me and more screams and Finnick's consoling voice. Somehow, he and Beetee get Peeta away from me, holding him back despite his desperate struggle. I have Katniss pinned tightly now, yet she still fights me. Her wrists strain against my angry grasp and her bow slams hard over and over again into my stomach, but I press on. I scrap at a rock next to her arm and bring it into my grasp, slamming it into her head. Her struggling slows and I take out my knife. Holding it between my teeth I position her arm to cut through her flesh. Just in that moment, her chest flexes forward as another last attempt to push me off and my knife misses its intended spot. The blade cuts deeply across her shoulder. Blood smeares on her wetsuit and up her neck.

"NO! No, Katniss! Katniss!" Peeta screams in anguish. I force myself off of the now dazed tribute.

 _Shit_. I look back over my shoulder.

Finnick has got Peeta in a terrible headlock and Beetee has his arms yanked back behind him to keep him from going after me. His weapon lays on some moss by my feet. I hastily get out of the way as they release him.

"I'm sorry, I missed. She moved when I was about to cut it out!" I want to explain, but the words are lodged in my throat. I look over at Katniss with wide eyes. Peeta sprints over to her, gathering her body in his arms. She's not dead, but now our plan is totaled. Both trackers are still stuck in the lovebirds arms' and now Peeta is going to try and kill us.


	9. Chapter Nine: The Arrow

**Katniss's POV**

"No, no, no..." Peeta's face comes in an out of focus as he cradles my body in his arms. His eyes shine down at me like stars in the darkness as I meet his gaze. I'm not dead, though I thought I was a moment ago. I struggle with all my might to move from my lax position. I don't know exactly what has just happened, other than the fact that the pain and sight of the blood makes me want to puke. Johanna pounced on me and I'm lucky that I'm alive. They're going to finish us off for sure. Peeta has to get away.

"Peeta... Peeta, I'm f-fine..." My voice slurs as I force myself to sit up. His strong hand supports my back to help me. Tears brim the surface of his eyes as he strokes my face. He rips the sleeve of his wetsuit and pats the blood off of my neck and arm.

"Go-get out... get out of here." I stammer, slouching against a nearby tree for support. Peeta brushes my hair behind my ear before shaking his head. He then turns to the other tributes, his expression dark. He has already gone after the three of them before I can speak another word. His sword raises high as he attempts to slice Finnick and the others to bits. I can hear his voice yell in rage as his weapon cuts through the air.

"Peeta! Peeta, listen! Johanna had to! Katniss is going to be tracked!" Finnick yells, his trident now in his hand as he defends himself from Peeta's blade.

 _Tracked?_ Of course, I have to be tracked. Why would Johanna cut my tracker out? No, she-she didn't. I force myself to look down. I gag.

 _She cut my shoulder instead._

"I don't care! Shut your mouth Odair, Johanna was going to kill her!" Peeta shouts back, continuing to fight. I want to yell at him that it doesn't matter, that he needs to get away, but bile ends up rises in my throats as orange spots dance across my eyes. I turn to throw up into the bushes nearby.

My throat burns as I come up for air. I try to force my wobbling feet to move towards Peeta. My shoe gets caught under me and I stumble over the coil connected to the tree and collapse, getting a mouthful of dirt. My cheek presses against the jungle floor as I stare curiously along the long line I had just tripped over.

The wire electrocutes the beach. Lightning hits at twelve. I remember. My eyes follow the coil, up the tree and into the dark sky. The force field takes up all the energy. Something insane clicks inside my mind. I glance over at Peeta and Finnick, who are now talking forcefully, rather than yelling, at one another. Yet, both of their weapons are still raised high. Peeta's nostrils are flared and his face is smoldering with anger as he spits words at Finnick, while Johanna and Beetee stand close behind.

I have to do this fast. I force myself off the ground, though my body hurts terribly. My hands shake as I yank out an arrow from my sheath. I cut the coil with the tip of it and begin to wrap the end around the base of the arrow, my fingers moving fast. Clouds are beginning to form overhead. I pause to puke once more.

 _C'mon, c'mon!_

I tie the wire at the end and load my bow quickly, aiming it straight into the sky. I hold my breath as I wait for the electricity to surge into my veins and join my already racing adrenaline.

For one moment my eyes break away from the sky as I catch Finnick staring at me. He and Peeta have stopped their heated conversation.

"Katniss, get away from there."

I force my eyes away, ignoring him and waiting for the lighting to strike.

"I said get away from that tree." Finnick repeats, his eyes flicking from me to the sky nervously. Peeta's eyebrows furrow.

"Katniss, what are you doing?" He asks hastily.

"You all need to leave." I answer firmly. It doesn't matter if we are allies or not, I'm blasting us all out of here. I'm done trying to decide who I'm going to kill and who I trust, when I already know who the real enemy is.

The wheels turn inside Peeta's head as he begins to figure out my plan.

"No, you'll be electrocuted!" Peeta yells, running to me.

"Get back Peeta!" I reply.

 _Don't you think that's what I want?_

I don't have time to push him away from me before the lighting cuts through the clouds. His hand brushes my arm just as I release the arrow into the force field.

A crackling sound rumbles in the distance until it climbs towards me, blaring into my ears. I shriek as the world around me explodes and I am thrown backwards into oblivion. The arena has caught on fire.


	10. Chapter Ten: The Steel Table

**Hello everyone! I haven't usually commented much on this story so far, but I would just like to thank everyone for the reviews! Hopefully you enjoy the way this story is going! So, in this chapter I am kind of cheating and doing another Katniss POV continued... you'll understand why soon. ;)**

 **Katniss's POV**

Smoke makes my eyes water profusely as I dare to open them. Tears run down my cheeks. The sun shines blindingly through the cracks in the sky. The sky... why is it broken? Iron rods poke out of one of the cracks and crashes down next to me. I don't even flinch at the sound. My eyes look over at it. The rod is now embedded into a tree and has split the wood down the middle. Near the tree I spy a person lying face down. Blonde hair waves in the slight breeze created by the hole in the sky. Who is this here with me? Who are they and where are we?

With all the strength I have left within me, I scoot over to the body. Pain ripples down my spine, yet I ignore it. My fingers comb through the blonde hair as I stare down into their face pressed against the ground. I freeze. It's Peeta. The memories flood back to me. The arena. The games. Finnick. Johanna. Beetee. Peeta. I shot my arrow into the sky and I broke the force field holding us in here.

A slight buzz comes overhead from the shattered sky. A hovercraft appears. A metal claw emerges from the plane, lowering down to the jungle to snatch us up whole. I wrap both of my arms tightly around Peeta's waist, holding him close to me and breathing in his familiar scent mixed with sweat and blood. He stays unconscious as the claw chomps over us, raising us from the jungle's floor. I take one look back at Peeta before my eyes begin to flutter closed and I black out again...

My head throbs horribly.

" _Peeta_." I mumble. My eyes squint open.

"Ugh." Another bright light blares down at me. I want to cover my face with my hands to block it out, but something restrains my wrists from doing so. I left my head to stare down. Two thick armbands clasp me to the stark white table I'm laying upon. Another two also are clamped around my ankles. I am naked as well, that is other than the paper thin, hospital blue gown which comes to my mid shin. A needle also is slipped into the veins of my arm and connects to a wire hooked up to a machine creating a slight beeping noise against the wall.

 _Where am I? Where is Peeta?_

I push against the restraints lamely. Eventually, I give up. My arms and legs are too weak to continue. I look straight across from me at the metal steel slab enclosing me. A tiny rectangular window is embedded into the slab, which is in fact I realized is a hinged door. A face stares back at me through the glass. He pushes back is square glasses and jots something down in the slick clipboard in his hands. By the look of his ironed white coat, I'd say he is of some medical profession. I open my mouth to tell him to get me out of here, but he leaves the window. I frown, then wince. My head still pounds. I rest back again on the table, letting my eyes close once more to block out the fluorescent lights and the stark white room...

 _"Katniss..." Peeta leans over me, the back of his hand caressing my cheek. His hair shines like the sun and his eyes are as bright as stars like they once were when I last saw him in the arena. I grin up at him. We lay in the Meadow. It's summer and I can smell the scents of all the growing plants and flowers, especially the primroses. Peeta's hands rest on either side of my head as he stares down at me. I run my hands through his golden locks and lean forward to kiss him. Our lips barely meet before he evaporates from my grasp._

I jerk awake. The feeling of the steel table below makes me feel extremely cold compared to the warm grass I was once resting on in my dream. Peeta was there. I look around once more. Is he here? No. He's not. They've moved me too. I'm not in the same room with the door and the window inside it. I'm now in another medical room. One with thick white curtains drawn on either sides of my table. At least now I have blanket on me over my paper thin gown, and the restraints have disappeared. I lift myself up from the cold steel, my body feeling sore. Though, the pain in my head is almost gone and I feel more awake and alert than before.

I look over at my forearm. I'm still connected to a few chords flowing fluid into my veins. Gripping the wires, I unhook them from me. Tentatively, I swing my legs off the table and sink my feet to the freezing tile floor. I wrap the blanket around me to cover up the sea-through paper I'm wearing. I've got to find Peeta. Wherever I am, whoever picked us up must have kept us together for we were found with my arms wrapped around him. My bare feet slap against the floor as I walk swiftly down the narrow room I'm in. All the areas of the room are curtained off and contain empty beds just like mine. I'm alone. I spy a door to my right, but when I pull on the handle I realize that it's locked. You need a special card to get in. I've seen some doors like this in the Training Center before. Effie usually had a card to insert into the panel like this on the wall so we could enter.

I bite my lip. If I'm in a hospital, there must be healers here. Or, as the Capital calls them, doctors. The Capital... am I in the Capital? Or am I someplace else? I hear the clicking sound of shoes against tile and I whip around. I hold up my fists, ready to fight. I find the same doctor with square glasses and the crisp white coat I saw before in the window. He gives me a small smile that doesn't reach his murky brown eyes.

"Ms. Everdeen. Good day, I am Doctor Griggs." He introduces himself, looking down at me as if I am a small child. I look over his appearance. His dark hair is combed neatly back and I can see waves of white streakes blend between the dark strains. His watery eyes squint down at me, as if he is trying to figure out my case. He's diagnosing me just by my appearance. I know he knows who I am, even before he had begun taking care of me on a medical standpoint. Then I remember, who doesn't know me?

He smiles yet again without his eyes and nods to me.

"I thought you'd be awake later this evening, so I left your side to file some data to the President." He speaks briefly. His voice is odd, the infliction in his words upturn. As if he is asking a question in everything he says. I open my dry lips to speak.

"The President?" I ask.

"Why yes. Our beloved leader, President Snow." He answers a matter-of-factly.


	11. Chapter Eleven: A Visit From Snow

**Peeta's POV**

A sense of warmth rushes through my body and slowly allows me to come to my senses. I peel my eyelids open, feeling the crust around the corners of my lashes. A _beep,_ _beep_ sound comes from my right and I find that I'm hooked up to a monitor. An IV sticks out of my wrist and connects to the machine. I rest on a plush hospital mattress fitted with blue sheets. I lay on top of the neatly made bed wearing only a thin hospital gown that matches the sheets. My eyes flicker away from myself as I notice how incredibly sea-through it is.

My body feels stiff as I push myself into a sitting position. After the blast of lightning burned the force field apart, I was thrown backwards and knocked out by its electric wave. Katniss, too.

 _Oh God, where is she?_

I swing my legs hastily off of the bed and stand up, only to come wobbling down dangerously and falling back on the bed. My prosthetic. I'm not wearing it. Somebody removed it. I open my mouth to call out to the somebody who must be taking care of me when the door to my room swings open.

"Mr. Mellark! Oh, how good. You are awake!" A high pitched voice sings. I yank the blue sheets over my nearly invisible paper gown.

 _Effie?_ No, not her, but very close. A lady with violently bright purple eyes and navy blue matte lips appears in the doorway.

"Oh dear, we must insist that you stay in the bed. You've suffered two broken ribs and a few second degree burns." She says, gesturing me to scoot back on the bed. I hesitantly obey her, though my eyes never leave her face. I could tell she was from the Capital a mile away. That must be where I am. They've rescued me, though I have no clue why. I was sure we were all going to die after Katniss's arrow was fired.

The Capital lady puffs up her platinum blonde curls with her hand and properly places herself on a fancy looking rolling stool, grabbing a clipboard from a metal table nearby my bedside. She grins brightly at me, showing all of her pearly teeth.

"Hello! I am your nurse, Pandora Friel." She holds out her delicate white hand. I don't shake it, but just stare at all of her jewel encrusted nails.

"Now, I know, of course, that you must be in terrible shock after what has recently happened these past few hours. I can say that I certainly was watching the screens when that arrow hit. It was nothing we've ever seen in a Hunger Games before! How it brought such speculation." Pandora shakes her head with a sigh.

"Do you know where Katniss is? Is she okay?" Is all I ask.

Pandora giggles, patting my leg.

"Of course, you must be eager for news! It is understandable. Katniss is in the Capital as well, recovering currently."

 _Katniss is here. She's okay, that's good_.

"Where is she? Can I see her?"

"Oh, I don't think I'm the person to say... you see, she is awaiting her trial." Pandora pouts, as if she'd rather not be the barer of bad news.

 _A trial_.

"Why? What's wrong?" The moment we enter back into the Capital, one of us is already in trouble.

"Well, it was hesitation that her arrow was an act of... rebellion against Panem!" Pandora cries.

"Oh, but I don't believe it true! I've watched you both ever since you came into the public eye after last year's Games. You were both so kind and generous towards all the Districts and the Capital! Your love shined all across Panem! I just can't believe that Katniss would ever think of such a ridiculous thing! Oh, no, no! Her being part of the rebellion? Never!" Pandora says with another smile, waving her hand dismissively. Well, our act did convince _somebody_ , I guess.

Of course it all appeared to be treason. It was. Katniss fired that arrow to prove something to herself. That she wasn't going to back down against Snow. She was prepared to die while doing it, too. How that effect would unravel, she had no idea. Now her and I are stuck here under Snow's nose. Nobody can help us, except... somebody.

"Can I please speak to my mentor? Where is he?" Haymitch can help me. Somehow, Katniss and I made it out alive because of him. He must have convinced them to pull us out. He can also help us get out of this mess with Katniss's trial.

Pandora bites her matte lip.

"I'm-I'm not sure what you mean?" She answers nervously.

"You know, one of the Victors from District Twelve. Haymitch Abernathy?"

"Well, we currently don't know the location of all the Victors who didn't enter into the 75th Hunger Games. Many have... mysteriously disappeared." She explains with a frown. What? What could have possibly happened to Haymitch?

A knock comes from the door. A Peacekeeper enters. I immediately straighten my back from my easy position, clenching my jaw tight. "President Snow has arrived for his visit." He speaks in his official voice, holding the door open. A bearded man with snake eyes enters. I swallow. Pandora shoots up from her stool, unsure what to do. Her hands tremble, yet she sinks into a deep curtsy at last, with a look of awe played upon her face. "President Snow! What an honor." She squeaks with delight, blushing deeply.

"Ah! Nurse Friel. Good to see you are tending to our patient. You may now exit the room. I need to speak with Mr. Mellark alone." His voice moves as smooth as silk. Pandora blushes an even deeper shade of red.

"Why certainly." She turns to leave the room with her clipboard, shutting the door quietly behind her.

I feel frozen as Snow comes to sit beside me. My body doesn't have the will to move and my tongue feels intacked to the back of my throat. A moment of silence overtakes us. I keep my eyes on the blue sheets wrapped around me as I feel his gaze pierce into my skull. At last, he speaks.

"It is good to see you Mr. Mellark. I, for one, didn't think you would escape the arena for yet a _second_ time. I especially didn't think you would come out a survivor, but not a _Victor_." He hisses the last part. He's right, more than one had escaped. Did Finnick and the others make it out, too?

"That was quite a stunt Miss Everdeen pulled off with the arrow. I thought it even more entertaining than the first with the berries." He chuckles darkly.

I don't answer.

"Now, unfortunately, we can't have a potential rebel get away with something so offensive against Panem without some sort of punishment. We all know the arrow was certainly an act of defiance this time, and not an act of love."

 _What are they going to do to her? Katniss, please don't hurt my Katniss._

"I assure that you, Mr. Mellark, are cleared of all charges against this. Which is why, after you recover, we must get you an interview with Cesar Flickerman as _soon_ as possible." President Snow grins, patting my leg. I stare at him in disbelief.

"But... when can I see her? Katniss?" If she's going to have to go through this with the trial and everything, I have to be by her side every minute. I'll convince them that she's innocent. The thought of her in prison, or worse, is unbearable. I am actually utterly surprised. If Snow thought her a rebel, why hasn't he _killed_ Katniss yet?

"Oh, don't worry. I'll let the both of you visit with one another. I'm not giving up on the star-crossed lovers story just yet." Snow winks. I want to throw up. Everything he says is making me sick.

"But, where is my mentor? My nurse told me he had disappeared." Haymitch. Katniss and I need him when it comes to acting in front of the cameras. He knows exactly how to help us play it.

"Oh, yes. _That_." President Snow smiles.

"If you are not already aware, we have a rebellion in the midst. Those who proved themselves loyal to it and not to Panem have run off to District Thirteen. Your mentor, and many others have joined them. Of course, no names have been revealed to the Capital and it's people. We are keeping it all quiet until absolutely nessesary. Wouldn't want panic within our most prized city, now would we? It's best to keep the people occupied on different things. Which is why, I want you to meet with Cesar the _moment_ you are well. Your amazing escape from the arena and the hopes of seeing your fiancée once again will be a _very_ entertaining story."

I nod, taking this in. I still feel dumbfounded by the whole thing. I had known a rebellion would come sooner or later. You'd be living under a rock if you didn't sense it coming. Uprisings have been happening all the way up to the 75th Games in nearly every District. Haymitch is in Thirteen? Katniss and I had a feeling it was never wiped out. Now, here is our proof. District Thirteen, the birth mother of the rebellion.

"Well, I will leave you with Nurse Friel to get you taken care of. Again, it's good to see you Mr. Mellark. I always did like you..." President Snow nods to me, then turning the knob on the door. Before he exits the room, he looks back at me.

"Oh, and I am so sorry about your family. A loss, District Twelve was. These things happen in war. Consequences are to be given to those who step out of line. I'm sure you understand." He smiles, shutting the door behind him and leaving me in a mix of terrible confusion and utter shock.


	12. Chapter Twelve: Behind Bars

**Katniss's POV**

My cell is tiny. A perfect white-walled square. The neat bed is tucked in the corner to my left and a metal desk and chair wedged in the other. The guards let me out to go to the bathroom twice a day and my meals are delivered through the tiny slot in my door. The moment I was released from the hospital, the Peacekeepers chained me up and brought me here. I've counted the days I've been rotting away. Exactly three, not bad really. My trial is scheduled for the end of the week and I had my interrogation the day after I was admitted to the Capital's temporary holding place for suspects.

President Snow visited me yesterday. The reasoning behind my trial was discussed and I am now labeled as a "potential rebel" according to the Capital. Along with Johanna, who was picked up from the arena as well. She's in the cell next to mine. Her trial is tomorrow. Apparently, her, Finnick, and Beetee were in on the rebellion the whole time. So was Haymitch. I was extremely angry at him for this when I had heard. Peeta and I were never informed about any rebellion and Haymitch never mentioned it to us that he was a part of it, let alone nearly half the tributes in the last games! Now, he's in Thirteen with Finnick and Beetee. The District had survived just as I had suspected.

The one thing I do question is my family. If they know that I'm in the Capital being interrogated for having ties with the rebels, they must be extremely worried. I think of poor little Prim. I wonder what she must think of her big sister, behind bars in the Capital. Or my mother. Is she blocking out the world again, knowing that if I'm announced guilty; I'll have to suffer the severe punishment?

I curl up upon my creaking bed, pulling my sheet-like white dress tightly over my cold knees. It's freezing in this cell, and they only provide us with short-sleeved, hospital gown-like outfits to wear. Not your typical orange jumpsuit, I guess. I am grateful, though. The moment President Snow entered my cell, I thought he was coming to announce my immediate death for treason against Panem. My situation could be a lot worse. President Snow could have taken out his anger on Peeta. In which case I think I'd rather die then witness. As long as Peeta is innocent and out of harm's way, it doesn't matter what happens to me.

My cell door creaks open, two Peacekeepers are here to escort me to see Peeta. This is our first meeting. My first time seeing him since the arena. My heart leaps and I nearly jump up to meet them. Taking out a pair of handcuffs, they chain my wrists together. The metal feels cold on my skin. One places a hand firmly on my shoulder and the other guides us down the hall. We pass by Johanna's cell. I curiously glance through the bars. She sits there on her metal chair, fiddling with her fingers, a dazed look on her face. Her head bounces up when she hears us coming. Her eyes meet mine. I nod to her and she returns the gesture. I haven't forgotten the thin scar she gave me on my shoulder. We turn down a few hallways and enter another small room lit with dim lights and completed with a narrow table and two chairs. The Peacekeepers force me into one of the chairs and then go behind a large window across from me to witness the visit. They sit in a pair of seats and place headphones over their ears, monitoring the noises in the room.

I hear a unfamiliar voice over the entercom.

"Send him in." A draft flows through the room as the metal door parallel with the large window opens. Peeta practically bursts into the room. His eyes find mine, and my lips tremble when I see his face. He's here and he's okay.

"Oh God." He whispers, rushing over to me. I shoot up from my seat and meet him in the middle. His arms engulf me and I bury my head into his shoulder. Unlike this room and my cell, he is full of warmth and comfort. My breath shakes and tears threatened to spill from my eyes, and I let a few run down my cheeks. Good effect if there are cameras watching us. His hands weave themselves through my hair and he brings his forehead to mine.

"I'm okay." I assure him, my voice sounding small. He kisses my cheek and reaches for my hands shackled together.

"How could they do this to you." He murmurs, a clear strain of anger in his voice. I just shrug.

"They think I've committed treason." By _they,_ I mean Snow.

"Katniss, we'll convince them that you're innocent. I'd take your place before they'd ever try and do something to you." Peeta tells me, hugging me close again.

"No, no taking my place. What's done is done." I say, my voice muffled in his shirt. He, unlike me, _is_ innocent. I won't have him be punished for my actions.

The intercom overhead speaks to us.

"Please, take your seats in the designated places for the continuation of the visit. You have thirty minutes." The voice crackles. Following the orders, we move to the table. Peeta on one side, me on the other. Our hands clasped in the middle.

"Katniss, do you know about Thirteen and the rebels?" Peeta asks me, his hands tightening around mine.

"Yes, I do. I know about Haymitch being a part of it as well." I avert my eyes away from him. He must be upset that Haymitch didn't warn him either. Nobody bothered to tell us anything.

"Your family, they are in Thirteen, too." Peeta tells me. I cock up an eyebrow. What is he talking about?

"What? No, they're in Twelve. They probably don't even know what's going on." I say, feeling guilty for my lack of contact with them, but there is nothing I can do about it.

"No, Katniss... there was a bombing. A bombing on Twelve." His voice cracks, tears forming in his eyes.

I gape at him.

"No... no, not District Twelve." I stammer. What? Why did this happen? Was this because of my arrow hitting the force field? I should have known I wouldn't get away with this so easily with just a sentence in prison. It's funny how President Snow failed to mention this in our last meeting.

"Your family is safe. Gale took them to Thirteen, along with his mother and siblings." Peeta explains, stroking my palm with his thumb. I blink. I'm amazed how quickly he took action to find out information for me.

"And-and your family?" I clear my throat uncomfortably.

"Are they in District Thirteen, too?"

Peeta's eyes wander away from my face.

"No. They, uh, they didn't make it."

I see the restlessness in his blue eyes. My heart sinks. I wish we didn't have to sit at this stupid table so I could hold him close to me and make all his pain disappear.

"Oh, Peeta..."

"I'm fine. I'm getting through it." He replies, forcing a small smile. I squeeze his hand in reassurance.

"How did you hear about all of this?" I wonder.

"I've only gotten bits of everything from President Snow." I admit.

Peeta nods.

"He visited me once, too. Since I'm a surviving Victor and not a suspect of treason, I was able to find out information about everything. They play the latest updates on the projector screen in the room I'm staying in."

I feel a tinge of jealousy. Peeta gets comfort in some hotel in the Capital, while I'm stuck here in the Peacekeepers' jail. It quickly goes away though, as I am reminded that it's better me then him being here.

"Ten minutes." The intercom drones. Panic rises within me. Only ten minutes before they take him away from me again.

"Katniss, my first interview with Cesar is tonight. I have some standard things to say, but I want to let you know that I have to update the Capital on you. I'll try and say anything to prove that you are innocent, I promise. Please, don't lose hope on me. I'll get you out of here." He leans down to kiss my knuckles. Goose pumps rise up my arms. I have a strange desire to wrap my arms around his neck and give him a long, heated kiss.

 _No, why would you want to do that?_ I think to myself.

He's Peeta. Your ally, your _friend_. Nothing else.

 _Then why do I have these sudden feelings for him?_ I ask myself.

 _No, don't think about that._

"Five minutes."

"Peeta." I say in a panicked voice. His hands reach up and grab my face. My eyes close as I enjoy his wonderful touch.

"Shh, it's okay. I'll come visit you everyday if they let me. I'll be right by your side during the trial. I won't let them keep us apart." He whispers.

"Okay. Please, tell me more about Thirteen when you get information." I say. He's my only outlet to finding out more about my family.

"I will, I promise. I... I love you." He says, his voice sounding firm. My stomach squirms.

 _It's just for the dumb cameras._ I tell myself. _Return the saying, Katniss._

"I love you, too." I say with more meaning then I had intended. His lips meet mine for a brief second, a flutter of a kiss, then the time is up. The Peacekeepers enter the room and escort Peeta away. Our gaze never leaves one another until the door slams shut, and I am left alone again.


	13. Chapter Thirteen: A Mirage

**Hey peeps! Fair warning, this is a long chapter. Longer than my usual chapters, which are about 1k. You're welcome. Hope you all enjoy! Without farther adieu...**

 **Peeta's POV**

My face drops into my hands as I seat myself in the escort car. The driver shuts the side door and climbs into his seat. We drive away from the tall steel building holding Katniss from me, keeping her from my tight grasp. I have the strong sudden desire to strangle the driver in front of me and every peacock-looking Capital citizen we drive past. They are filled with more luxury, comfort, and happiness in their lives then they know what to do with. It makes them blind. They don't see the horror of the world outside their perfect city.

"Here you are, sir." The driver announces in his ridiculous accent, bouncing out of his seat to help me out of the car. I climb out and awkwardly search through my pockets. Taking out a few coins, I uncertainly drop them into his outstretched hand. I still have no idea how this whole "I take you where you want to go" system works. The man thanks me and drives away.

My eyes follow up the fancy hotel building in front of me. Three days staying here and I still cannot fathoms how incredibly tall it is. Nor, how much it must have cost to build it. My mind imagines dozens of Avoxes working away to the bone in the hot sun to create this marble and gold building. The thought disgusts me, so I just shake my head and trudge through the giant glass doors. Slamming my fist into the elevator button, I wait for it to shoot me up to the eleventh floor.

When I reach my room, I collapse onto my silk bed. My brain still can't get over the fact that Snow granted me full pardon after I was rescued. Here I am, in this immaculate room. With all of my things sent to me from my Victor's house and my money safely stored up in the Capital's bank. A memoir of my family's Bakery was sent as well. The bread sign that used to hang in front of the window. The whole idea made me sick to my stomach. Snow killed my family. He ruined my home, and he acts like all of this luxury and comfort will make up for it. But I know that it all goes much deeper.

All of his generosity is just to show the rebels that I'm a part of the Capital now. That he won over Katniss and I, the potential leaders for the rebellion, and there is nothing District Thirteen can do about it. He's going to squander our image until they despise us. I can't stop him from doing it either. He'll threaten Katniss, and I can't have that. This is the only way to keep us safe.

I scoot over to the fancy nightstand by my bed. My clock reads 3:02. I have to be at my interview with Cesar in about an hour. Pushing off of the bed, I go to the bathroom to make myself look somewhat presentable before my prep team arrives. My _new_ prep team, that is. Portia and the others were executed like Cinna before the last games, and Katniss's prep team... I don't know where they are. Neither Effie, for that matter. I had an interest to go searching for her after I was released from the hospital, but I had no idea where to look. Everyone I asked had simply stated that she'd "disappeared." These comments have been concerning and frightening to me because I don't know what they imply.

I hear a rapping at my door.

"Mr. Mellark! Time to get prepped for your interview!" A voice shrills through the wall. I reluctantly invite three brightly dressed people inside. One, named Citrus, throws her arms around me and gives me two pecks on the cheek.

"Good to see you darling!" She says in her dramatic voice. Like usual, she is wearing her lemon yellow wig and matching bright lips. Next enters Kemuel, a very purple man with his skin dyed a nice shade of lavender, and wearing tattoos of plums up his arms. Thalia enters right behind him, wearing her bright red corkscrew curls and smelling of apples. When they first met me, a certain theme came to my mind. _They all look like fruit._ I thought.

They lived up to my suspicious for sure, always greeted me with different fruity looking appearances when they come to my hotel. I just hope I don't have to dress up like a watermelon or something for my interview with Cesar.

"So, Cynthia is bringing your suit after we get you ready. Then, we have a very special car ready to take you to Cesar's studio!" Citrus says as she sets me on a seat in the small kitchen, pulling out her many combs and hairspray bottles.

"Okay." I answer flatly as she begins to brush back my shaggy blonde hair. I hear her mutter something about cutting it and I just roll my eyes. So much preparation for just an interview.

 _Just like the games._ I think.

I almost feel like I'm reliving it all over again. Prepping, interviews, convincing the people, and pretending to have a love affair with a girl.

After I'm done being plucked and pruned and washed, then plucked and pruned again; Cynthia (my new stylist) finally arrives with my suit. Unlike my prep team, she doesn't obtain the fruit look. Her hair is the color of platinum and straight and sleek, reaching about the back of her knees. She wears a simple black dress and has decorative stars tattooed under her eyes of blue and purple.

"I'm here with the suit!" She sings happily, pulling a tailored navy blue coat and pants out of a protective bag. Her long painted nails wrap around its fabric as she helps me into it. She buttons the coat and then brushes the shoulders off, insuring that everything looks perfect.

"You'll do amazing." She tells me when she is finally finished, her eyes meeting mine. They are the color of Katniss's eyes, but not as beautiful. I know they are just contacts. Hers are fake, but Katniss's are real. She and the Districts and the rebellion are real. The Capital is not. It's just a mirage.

The "very special" car here to take me to Cesar's studio arrives. I slide into the back and take a few white cards out of my pocket. I look over them again. I wrote out a few things to help me guide myself through the questions with Cesar. If I get a chance to say anything about Katniss's case, I will. I'll do anything to convince the Capital that Katniss is _not_ a rebel.

We arrive at the circular shaped building where Cesar does his nightly shows. Cynthia and my prep team follow close behind us in another car. They escort me through the doors and around backstage. Producers and set designers bustle around, getting everything in order for tonight's interview. The stage is lit in a simple manor, with just two plush chairs and a square coffee table. Not the typical backdrop for Cesar's usual shows. I understand why. The real focus is to be on me. I bite the inside of my cheek, thinking about how many people will want to hear me speak tonight.

I find Cesar by a hair and makeup station. Someone is touching up his powder blue hair. Cesar's matching blue eyebrows raise when he sees me approach him.

"Ah! Peeta, my boy! Glad you are here!" Cesar exclaims, shooting up from his stool and brushing off his hair stylist as she attempts to comb back a stray piece of his hair. She nods and drifts away, her five inch heels clicking across the floor.

Cesar reaches out his hand and I shake it.

"Nice to see you, Cesar." I answer politely. He grins.

"This is _such_ an exciting evening, if I do say so myself. We will have so much to talk about! It looks like we are on in fifteen. Better take our places!" He announces, bustling over to the stage.

"Wait!" A voice shrieks. I turn to see Citrus rush over to me. Her fingers fix the tiniest piece of hair above my ear.

"Okay, perfect! Good luck Mr. Mellark!" She smiles.

"Uh, you can call me Peeta, if you want." I tell her. I was never one for formality. The prep team are my equals. Her grin widens.

"Peeta." She says, trying it out.

"Yep." I reply, turning to go onstage. I sit across from Cesar, crossing my left ankle over my right knee, trying to appear comfortable to the audience.

"We are on in ten seconds!" The Director practically yells behind the camera directed at the perfect picture of Cesar and I. The camera rolls forward automatically. It positions itself in front of center stage. I count down silently in my head.

 _Three, two, one._

"Okay, you're on Cesar." The Director confirms through his ear piece. Cesar, touching a matching one hidden under his hair, gives a short nod.

"Hello Panem! Welcome to my evening show. We are reporting live from the Capital and tonight I have a very special guest. Victor of the 74th Hunger Games and one of only four survivors in the Quarter Quell, let me present to you, Peeta Mellark!"

The camera shifts towards me and I give my most award-winning smile.

"Good to see you, Cesar." I address him.

"And to you as well, might I say! Long time, no see. Am I right?" Cesar laughs.

"You are right, you are right." I nod. Cesar slaps his knee.

"Wonderful! Now, Peeta. How are you since the last games? Are you recovering alright? I heard you suffered from some broken ribs." Cesar frowns.

"Yes. I have, but I am all healed now. No need to worry!" I assure Cesar and the audience.

"Oh, I am glad! It's comforting to hear you are in good health. One thing I do have to ask you though, is how you are handling everything _emotionally_." Cesar asks with a raised eyebrow.

 _Perfect time to slip in a comment about Katniss._

"To tell you the truth... not well." I admit, looking down at my hands.

"Not well." Cesar repeats.

"And why is that?"

I look up again, so the camera can get a good view of my upset face.

"As you and probably everyone in Panem already know, Katniss is being held for a trial."

Cesar plays a shocked look.

"I-I had heard rumors, but... are you saying this is confirmed? Is she really tried with suspected treason against Panem?" Cesar asks, leaning forward.

"Yes." I answer. Cesar shakes his head.

"Oh, my dear boy. How awful."

"Yeah, it is."

"Do you have any reasoning to why she fired that arrow? You don't believe she really _is_ with the rebels, do you?" Cesar questions.

"No, I don't. Katniss-she had no idea a rebellion was going on. Neither did I. We were both just trying to stay alive." I say with determination.

"Yes-yes, but back to the arrow. Why did she shoot it into the force field?" Cesar asks, an edge of excitement in his voice. I play it off.

"I don't think she knew what she was doing. The games-they changed her. She couldn't think straight." I answer, hoping that Katniss won't be too upset by me playing her as "crazy," but what choice do we have at this point?

"Ohhh, I see... so you are saying that she wasn't thinking as clearly as she had ought to?"

"There was a lot going on that she had to deal with." I reply with a sigh.

"To be sure, to be sure. Do you think some of this was because of the... baby?" Cesar whispers the last word. I nod, glad that he's making me appear convincing now.

"Yes, that was definitely a part of it." I say, trying to make my voice sound emotional.

"Oh dear, I completely forget to send my condolences to you both on the miscarriage. That must have been a great shock to the both of you." Cesar gently places a hand on my shoulder. I decide not to answer. I just nod in reply.

"Now, when is Katniss's trial?" Cesar wonders, switching topics.

"This coming Saturday." I confirm.

"Well, be sure folks to tune in then. It should be televised, if I am correct." Cesar tells the camera. After a few short words, we wrap it up. The camera shuts off and after shaking hands again with Cesar, I am allowed go. I leave the stage, hoping my performance was good enough for President Snow and the Capital.


	14. Chapter Fourteen: Pearls And Pendants

**Katniss's POV**

I roll my pearl between my thumb and forefinger as I sit on my iron bed. Peeta's gift. My only personal thing I was able to smuggle into the cell. The Peacekeepers had stripped me of all my possessions once I was released from the hospital. I wasn't able to save Peeta's pendant, but the pearl I had put in my mouth when they weren't watching and kept it safe between my teeth until I was locked up here. I press the smoothness of it to my lips, remembering all of the kisses Peeta had given to me in the arena. I also remember our most recent one. It was so soft and so light you might have thought it not to be there.

A bang comes from the cell to my left. I hop off of my bed, startled by the noise.

"Gah!" I hear someone cry. I look through the bars of my cell to see two Peacekeepers dragging a small figure down the hallway. By the look of their struggling, I assume it's Johanna. During her trial, she was pronounced guilty for plotting with the rebels. Where the Peacekeepers are taking her, I don't think I want to know. I curiously poke my head farther around to get a better view. One of the men in the white uniforms gags her and the other shackles her wrists and ankles together. Picking her up off of the floor in one sweep, they carry her away.

My eyes wide, I sink back into the white wall beside me. If everything goes wrong on Saturday, if President Snow believes me guilty, I'll be joining Johanna soon enough. I clutch my pearl tighter. Peeta had his interview with Cesar yesterday. Hopefully he'll explain to me what he had said, when I see him again. I wonder how he and I are going to play it this time. There is no Haymitch or Effie to tell us how to present ourselves to the Capital. Peeta and I are alone.

I crawl back over to my bed and curl up upon it. It will all be over soon. Either I'm pronounced innocent and cleared to live my fake life with Peeta, or I am condemned to the similar fate like Johanna's. I wonder which would look more pleasing to Gale and my family. What will they wish my fate to be, with being part of the rebellion now? Is it better to live in the Capital with Peeta, promoting President Snow and cursing District Thirteen and everyone who is for the rebellion? Or should I be thrown to the wolves, remembered as the rebellious Victor and tribute, a known martyr for the uprisings and the freedom of the Districts? These thoughts confuse me. I ponder over them until I at last doze off.

The opening of my cell door shakes me awake. The Peacekeepers are here again. This can only mean one of two things. It's my turn to use the restroom, or I have a visitor-Peeta. I hope it's the second. I untangle myself from my ball-like position and follow the two men in matching white outfits. They handcuff my wrists together as usual and one pushes me forward while the other leads us to the meeting room. We pass by Johanna's empty cell and many other vacant ones until we reach the now familiar room. I sit eagerly at the metal table and watch as the Peacekeepers leave to go behind the glass to observe the visit.

The door swings upon and I wait for Peeta to come rushing in again, his warm presence comforting me as before. Peeta doesn't come. He's not my visitor today. President Snow is. His snake-like eyes dart over to me, and I want to sink deep into my seat. I don't though. I keep my chin held high and fold my hands firmly in front of me.

"Cameras off." President Snow orders swiftly to the Peacekeepers listening in the other room.

He then approaches me, placing himself in the opposite chair.

"Ms. Everdeen, we meet again. I am sorry for taking up Mr. Mellark's visiting hours, but you see I had to speak with you."

I raise an eyebrow.

"I didn't realize how popular I have become."

Snow gives a tight smile.

"Well, in terms of your trial, I have some things to discuss with you."

I nod.

"Yes?"

"I am going to tell you a story. I want you not to interrupt and listen very carefully. Do you think you can manage that?" Snow asks, eyeing me suspiciously.

"Yes." I repeat.

"There once was a young girl from District Twelve. Naive, foolish, and in love with a boy who was from a different class then her. They entered the 74th Hunger Games together, expressed their feelings for one another inside a romantic cave set deep in the woods, and never could even _imagine_ being apart since. When the time came for one of the two to die, they could not commit the gruesome act. So, because of there undying love for one another, they threatened to die together rather than be apart. The gamemakers were so moved by this that they announced both tributes as winners, instead of risking a Hunger Games without a Victor.

"After being announced as Victors and receiving praise and support from their adoring fans all around Panem, the two lovers wanted to get married. They announced their engagement during the Victory Tour and began preparations for their wedding, but disaster struck when the Quarter Quell came upon them. One man and woman from the Victor's pool was to be picked to fight to the death. The thought of the new games and the current stress of the 74th Hunger Games had put the young, _stupid_ girl in a state of fragile mind. Nightmares and anxiety were only some of the many problems she was beginning to face as the 75th games drew nearer and nearer.

"During the final interviews on the evening before the games, the boy had revealed to the Capital and all of Panem that him and the girl had gotten married in secret and were expecting a child. This was quite a shock to everyone, but the two were forced into the games nevertheless. As before, both had escaped the blood bath, and survived to the last four tributes. On the fourth night, the lovers' known allies had turned on them, leaving the young girl injured. Just before the clock struck twelve that night, the girl became worried that her love and unborn baby would be faced with death by the other tributes if she did not do something about it. Believing that she could somehow escape from all trouble, she fired an arrow into the force field surrounding the arena. She then suffered from a miscarriage and her and her lover were picked up graciously by the Capital and were taken care of, despite all the trouble this _insane_ girl had caused." President Snow pauses. I wait.

"Is that... the end of the story?" I ask tentatively.

"Correct. I'm sure you understand now who that young girl is?"

"I think so."

"I could have killed you or thrown you in prison to rot the rest of your life, but that boy of yours changed my mind. Why kill the girl who was on fire, when I can simply erase her from the rebellion? Putting out the spark of hope forever." Snow chuckles. I shift uncomfortably in my seat.

"And what if I-"

"Refuse to play your role? Oh, we've touched on this quite a few times, don't you think? You must _learn_ , Ms. Everdeen."

I nod.

"I understand. I'll convince them just as before." I say.

"Good. It's nice to see you Katniss. I hope to meet you again at your trial. I know it will be an event not worth missing." Snow winks, standing up to exit. My body shudders the moment the steel door closes. The room seems even _colder_ then before.


	15. Chapter Fifteen: Playing Pretend

**Peeta's POV**

Katniss looks ghostly the day of the trial. I meet her before the front doors of the main Court Room with the Peacekeepers. Again, they have her hands shackled behind her back and are hovering over her like a couple of vultures. Not once do they leave her side so we can be alone. She's dressed in a plain blue dress with black flats. Her hair is done in her usual braid down her back and her eyelashes and eyebrows appear darker than normal. Somebody must have brushed some makeup on her too. She almost looks like she once did during the first Reaping, except there are dark circles under her eyes and a concerned expression played upon her face.

"Hey, you okay?" I ask her, placing my hands on her slim shoulders. I've also noticed that she's lost a couple of pounds since being locked away. How quickly could that have happened when only a week has gone by?

"I'm fine. I just didn't sleep." She mutters, biting her lower lip.

"Nightmares or fear of today?" I want to ask, but I don't. Her eyes keep fluttering over to the mahogany double doors to the Court Room. I rub her arms reassuringly.

"Hey, everything is going to be fine. Remember, President Snow believes you to be innocent." I choose my words carefully in front of the Peacekeepers. Snow made Katniss and I a deal. Nothing will happen to her if we both play our role. No suspicions against Katniss will be found and she'll be cleared of all charges.

"It's not that." She whispers. I lift her chin up so I can see into her silver eyes.

"Then what is it?" I ask.

"I'm worried about my family... Prim, seeing me like this. The trial is going to be filmed and-and she'll see me on the screens." Katniss explains, taking in a deep breath.

"Oh. Katniss... Prim isn't alone, remember? She has her mother and she has Gale. They'll all be together when they watch the trial. Prim doesn't realize it yet, but you and I know that you're not going to be found guilty. Think about how relieved she'll be to know that you're going to be safe." I try to assure her. It's difficult for me to attempt to calm her about something so intimate as her family, but I do my best nevertheless. I don't want her to be worried anymore.

Katniss sighs.

"Yes... I just don't want to disappoint her." She admits quietly.

I don't understand what she means at first, but then I slowly begin to get it. Prim and her mother and Gale are part of the rebellion now. She's worried that they will be disappointed by what may happen in the future if she's announced innocent. Of course, she'll have to be for the Capital and not the rebellion as part of Snow's deal. I know Katniss will be ashamed if she'll have to follow through with playing our role again. I will feel that way too, but does she really believe her family would be upset with her for being spared from some gruesome punishment? Would they rather watch her suffer, knowing she was for the rebellion? Would Gale think that of her? I shake my head. It's a terrible, evil thought. To have more pride in a cause then sympathy and love for someone you care about? No, I don't believe they'd feel that way.

"She won't be disappointed Katniss. Prim and your mother will want to see you safe. First, above all other things." I leave out Gale, because I'm not so sure about him. He was pretty upset about our fake love affair, even though it likely saved Katniss's life, but then again that may have just been jealousy.

"Time to enter the Court Room." One Peacekeeper says in a deep voice, his hand tightening around Katniss's shoulder. I do everything in my power not to glare at him as I kiss Katniss on the forehead. I don't like that we get no time together, but I have to go take my place as well. I get a few things to say on the stand because of my place in the Quarter Quell.

"I'll see you soon." I assure her, leaving to enter one of the side doors into the massive room holding Katniss's trial. I look up at the great dome enclosing me in awe. Gold rings align the ceiling and a bright stained glass window creates a yellow circle in the center of the marble floors. It's exactly twelve o'clock. I step around the long benches set facing the judge's podium until I quietly find my spot in the back.

A few groups of people file in, all wearing obscure and colorful outfits completed with crazy makeup and tall hairstyles. Next, a large series of Peacekeepers enter. Each are armed, and they escort President Snow into the Court Room. I swallow at the sight of their machine guns, remembering the man from District Eleven. Shot straight through the head by a Peacekeeper right after Katniss's beautiful speech. They will shoot anybody in this room who steps out of line.

After the judge appears from the back door and seats himself (President Snow placed not too far away), Katniss enters down the main aisle, shackled and followed by two guards. The Capital citizens watching her gap at the sight of their chained Victor. Their mouths are open and their voices quiet as Katniss and the Peacekeepers march to the judge. I can't imagine how much they must have paid to get a chance to see this in person. Everybody in Panem must be tuned in on their screens right now. Cameras are at every area in the room.

Despite everyone staring at her, Katniss keeps her head held high and her expression blank. My biggest wish is to run over to her and hold her hand, but I stay still and watch until the Peacekeepers force her into her place. My teeth clench at the sight of them pushing her around like that, but the worst part is that Katniss's doesn't fight back. She can't fight back. It's another deal we both made.

After a few words from the Judge, the trial follows and the cases from the witnesses soon proceeds. One witness who supposedly "watched the ending of the Quarter Quell with Haymitch and some of the other rebels," speaks a few words suggesting the opposing side of Katniss's trial. After the annoying Capital man finishes, it's my turn to take the stand. I explain Katniss's fragile state of mind and how the games had confused her. She meant no harm to the Capital in firing that arrow and was just trying to save myself and her unborn baby. As I speak, I stare at her the whole time. She catches my eye and gives me a small smile, slightly breaking away from her blank face she's supposed to maintain the entire time. I don't care, though. I want her to know that I'm here for her. That it's not just for the large audience watching us.

President Snow gives a few words and then the Judge goes forth with the case. Just as Snow had promised us, Katniss is pronounced innocent. I shouldn't be relieved, but I am. I hope my face looks convincing on the cameras ringed around the room as I stare happily at Katniss.

President Snow stands, a slight smirk fluttering across his face. He opens his mouth and I can almost smell his breath laced with perfume and blood even though I'm sitting well far away.

"Now, I think it is wise to send Ms. Everdeen to rehabilitation right away. The Quarter Quell and these last few days must have been extremely harrowing for her." He addresses to the Peacekeepers.

"Thank you all for coming, you are dismissed. Oh! And don't forget to watch the exclusive interview tonight with Mr. Mellark and Cesar Flickerman." President Snow's eyes find mine and he gives me a curt nod.

 _Aaand we've already begun to play pretend_.

Katniss puts on her confused look as the men unshackle her. She quietly thanks them and seats herself on one of the wooden benches. The people who viewed the trial pass by, giving her different looks. Some are full of sympathy, while others are confused. They bump into one another absentmindedly, just trying to catch a better glimpse at the now labeled "insane girl." They probably haven't heard of something like this since that one Victor, Annie Cresta, went crazy.

The moment I can get through the large crowd filing out, I rush over to Katniss. Her eyes see me and she shoots up from her place, throwing her arms around my neck. I grab her waist tight, holding her close to me. I hope they don't tear us apart ever again.

"Ready to create a stunning performance?" I whisper into her ear, feeling strains of her hair tickling my face.

"I don't think we really have a choice." She replies quietly to me, gripping the back of my shirt tight.


	16. Chapter Sixteen: Majestic Mountains

**Katniss's POV**

I lay awake in my bed as I count on my fingers. Two weeks? Is that correct? Yes, I think so. Two weeks I've been at the Rehabilitation Center. In a month I can leave, though this feels like it will drag on forever. I groan and sit up in bed. It's early morning, I can tell from the dim light leaking out from my black curtains. A knock comes at my door, and my nurse, Ilana, enters with a bright smile. I don't know why she even bothers to knock. Everyone just enters anyway no matter what my consent is.

"Katniss! It looks like your up and ready for today." She chirps in a sweet voice, though I can still hear the hint of her Capital accent. She's wearing her usual blue, as everyone does here. Her hair is the color of fire and cut to her shoulders and she never fails to put on her bubble gum pink lipstick.

I nod in reply, sliding out of my simple bed which matches my simple room. Not the slightest amount of imagination was put into creating this place. The walls are murky gray and the chairs and beds almost match with a similar color of steel. If I hadn't known any better, I would have thought this to be a slight improved version of my old cell.

"Do you know what today is?" She asks me with a big grin, her voice dripping with enthusiasm. I play my usual uncertain face, pretending not to understand. I know what today is. Monday. Peeta sees me on Monday's, Tuesday's, Friday's, and Saturday's. I'm surprised President Snow didn't make it everyday and have Peeta move in in a room down the hall. The paparazzi practically swarm him everytime he enters the Center to visit me. I'm sure the public is eating up every article and picture they shell out about us.

"Peeta is coming to visit! I'm sure he'll bring something special again!" My nurse exclaims, gesturing to my growing pile of presents next to my bed. At least they make the room a bit more lively. Other than the time I nearly barfed at the smell of white roses he had brought me. I know it's not Peeta's fault. Nobody knows about my sensitivity towards the stench. So those were thrown out and Peeta came up with the new strategy to send me chocolates and diamonds instead. The jewelry glitters in the glass cases, catching the tiny rays of sunlight from the window.

"I'm sure you must be thrilled! Dr. Aurelius says that you are recovering at a rapid pace when he tells me about your recovery plan." She winks, laying out my daily clothes for me. Everyone in the psych ward wears identical day outfits and pajamas. I slide on my sky colored shirt and pants. Ilana brushes out my long dark hair and braids it back. I allow her to also put on my shoes and socks. She does almost everything for me. She even helped me put on my shirt the first week here. I wonder how insane Snow told the people I was here? Last time I checked I was just suffering from PTSD, anxiety, and slight hallucinations. Can people with all of that still get ready by themselves? I think so.

Not to say that I don't struggle with some of those things. Actually, despite from being aggravatingly bored here, I feel a bit more calm since the Quarter Quell. But I think that's just the medication. It _does_ help with my PTSD. I didn't realize I had it until I popped the pills. I thought it was just nervousness after the games. Apparently, it's a diagnosis.

They actually don't force me to do much here, and at least I am not too insane that I can still wander around the Center without a nurse escorting me. With, of course, the exception of having a tracker in my medical armband. They know exactly where I am, just like the Quarter Quell. Although, I get to talk with Peeta almost everyday. He helps get me more information about District Thirteen and the rebellion. There is a strict "no projector screen" policy here. People are dying for news though.

You'd be surprised how many messed up Capital citizens ended up here. I've heard it's expensive treatment. Nobody from even the richest districts could afford it, but most of the Victors were sent here after their games. Peeta and I weren't, but Annie Cresta and the morphling twins stayed here for a bit. Even Haymitch got a room here after a drunk rage, trying to loosely attempt to get himself off of the liquor. It didn't work, obviously.

After a few raps at my door, Peeta enters holding his usual special present. I put on my cheesy smile and race over to him, smacking my lips against his in a deep kiss.

"Easy now, your going to squish your gift!" Peeta laughs as we break away. I gaze up at him.

"It's only been a day, but I've missed you." I whisper. I don't say much as part of acting mental, but I do spare my words for Peeta. Ilana pats my shoulder.

"I'll leave you two together." She says, closing the door shut behind her, a sly smile on her face. I want to roll my eyes, knowing too well that she's just going to watch us on the cameras. I'm video taped all day long. The last thing you get at the Rehab Center is privacy.

"For you." Peeta says, placing a small box into my hands. I eagerly open it. It's the same as always, a jewel necklace. Nobody knows that though, not even my nurse. Peeta's stopped buying different presents long ago. He always hands me identical necklaces now. I don't care, for it's not the jewelry I want, it's what's inside the locket at the center of the gold chain that matters most to me. Peeta handwrites what he witnesses on the screens that he can't share out loud with me. Updates on the rebellion and their next move on the Capital. Talk of war is also strictly prohibited here, too. They say it makes the patients upset. Hearing it doesn't make _me_ upset, it just makes me hungry for more.

"Thank you." I reply, hugging the box close to me. I'll read the note under my covers tonight and then tear it to shreds and hide it under my napkin during breakfast tomorrow morning.

"Shall we take our daily walk?" He asks me, offering his arm. I politely take it and we head off on our way. Ilana gives us permission to go outside to the small courtyard behind the cement block of a building. She scans my armband and unlocks the hall door. Peeta and I climb down some stairs and enter the courtyard through the back of the main lobby.

The Capital looks like they've invested in a couple of pretty trees and a nice walkway for the people here. Tiny flowers bloom along the sidewalk and the green grass beyond has been swept of spare leaves. The whole place might actually be quite pleasant if it were not for the towering wired fence surrounding it. I never can seem to get out of my cage. First in the arena, then the temporary jail cell, and now here. I grip Peeta's hand tightly. He's the only one who can free me from it all.

"Do you know when they'll let you out?" He wonders, leading me down the main path. Peeta asks me this every visit, even though he knows that nothing will change.

"One month. That's September 5th." I respond. I understand. He's anxious without me. All he does every day is answer questions from the public and get interviewed by Cesar. Hey, but it's not like I'm having a party over here though. At least Peeta can leave his hotel room at will. Or even go to the _bathroom_ , for that matter.

 _Huh, another similarity between the psych ward and my old cell._

We sit upon one of the wood benches by a tall pine tree. I look out to my left at the purple Rocky Mountains towering over us. They're majestic, unlike any other mountains I've seen. The way the sun falls upon them makes the colors swirl up the steep cliffs. Violent blue and purple mixed with fire, like Ilana's hair. They'd be even more beautiful if it weren't for the white glittering Capital in the way. The Capital's always in the way. It stains everything free and full of hope. Peeta follows my gaze. For a while, we sit there in silence, admiring the landscape.

At last I tear my eyes away. I look up to see two people staggering down the path towards us. Peeta nods and smiles at them. One, an elderly Capital lady still trying to rock the trendy Capital wigs rolls her eyes at Peeta's acknowledgement; the other, a skinny young man with stringy blonde hair just laughs at us. I raise an eyebrow as I watch them make their way farther down the path.

"God, I want to get you out of here so bad." Peeta mutters to me, his eyes still watching the two odd people.

"Well, you're going to have to deal with it. There's nothing we can do." I answer out of the corner of my mouth.

"I wish the rebels would have picked us up. I wish Johanna had cut out your tracker and I hadn't tried to pull her off you." He spits, clenching the hand that's free of mine into a fist. I gap at him.

"So that's what she was trying to do." I whisper. I knew Johanna was plotting with the rebels, but I didn't know she had tried to save me. The rebels could have rescued us if our trackers hadn't caused the Capital to pick us up first.

"Yes. I only heard this morning. Something prodcasted in Thirteen. I shouldn't have told you here, but I would of had to get extra paper and snuck it into your next gift tomorrow. I didn't want you to have to wait." Peeta whispers into my ear. The lady who rolled her eyes at Peeta earlier gives us a look from the other side of the courtyard. I put on a smile and pretend to laugh.

"She's watching." I say through gritted teeth, stretching out my forefinger secretly in her direction. Peers understands and places his pleasant face on as well.

I lean in to give him a kiss, mumbling a "thanks" into his cheek. Now that I know Johanna was trying to keep Peeta and I safe, I feel guilty about her sentence. I have no clue where she is now. She could be very well dead.

Peeta's hands slide up my back, his fingers fiddling with the hem of my shirt.

"I have to speak again tonight with Cesar. What should I tell him about your state of mind today?" He chuckles. We both know this is ridiculous. I lean forward, so our chests touch.

"That I'm doing fine, but the nightmares are hard without you." I say, lowering my eyes. It's true. I've never fully admitted it to him before, because I don't wish to be pitied. He has the right to here the words come out of my mouth. The nightmares are awful here without him. They give me pills, but they don't help one bit. Peeta is the only one who can seem to get rid of them for me. I often wake up screaming his name, only to find myself in my lonely twin bed, with Ilana rushing into my room and making me down medication to help me go back to sleep. The one thing that has _not_ been calm about the Center is the absence of him.

I never thanked Peeta for all of those nights he held me while I cried, or when he calmed me after I had let out terrible screams and probably woke up everyone sleeping near us. I had felt guilty before for using him to help me sleep, until I learned that he needed me too. I helped him with his nightmares just like he kept mine at bay. I wonder how he has been holding up at night without me by his side, too.

"Okay." He answers with a small smile, hugging me close to him. I lean my face into his shoulder, smelling his comforting scent. I may be in the Capital, away from my now destroyed home and my family, but at least I have Peeta. I would become insane for _real_ if anything happened to him.

Soon, Peeta has to leave. We say our mushy goodbyes as always and I force myself to shed a couple of tears as Ilana leads me upstairs to my gray room. I watch out the window as Peeta is mobbed by the paparazzi as he gets into his car. The cameras flash and the reporters scream out questions as the driver attempts to hit the gas petal. I turn away in disgust and sit on my bed.

Ilana offers me lunch, which I eat a couple of bites. She then gets out a couple of card games for us to play, but I shake my head at her. I'm not in the mood. Besides, Dr. Aurelius says it's not in my recovery plan to be interactive on a regular basis, so I don't care if I'm acting disagreeable.

Lost in thought, I lay back on my bed and watch the sun lower slowly to the west. I wish my room was facing the mountains. Then I could see the mysterious shadows flicker across the rocks as the sun sinks.

I look over at my tiny clock on the wall. Once my curfew comes, I can hide under my blankets and read Peeta's papers. I pace around my room, waiting for nine o'clock to arrive. At last it does and my nurse comes into my room. She helps me into my nightgown and pulls the covers over me.

"My necklace." I say simply. Ilana understands and she takes the glass box from the window. Opening the case, she hands me the locket. I hold it close to my chest.

"What a beautiful gift. Peeta really is a wonderful boy. You are lucky to have him." She tells me whimsically, tucking the covers around me.

I nod. Ilana's sweet, but she's terribly naive.

"Goodnight Katniss." She says, shutting the door behind her. The moment I hear her clicking heels fade down the hall, I pull the sheets over me and open the locket. I leave a crack in the covers for light from the moon outside my window and unfurl the slip of paper tucked inside the jewel. Taking in a deep breath, I read Peeta's haste handwriting.

 _President Coin, the name of the leader of the rebellion._

 _Finnick and Gale appeared on the screens. They were in District Two. The mines were bombed there._

 _Uprisings in Four and Eight_

 _Hang in there, Katniss. I'll see you tomorrow._

 **Author's Note:**

 **Hey everyone! Thank you for reading my story! I appreciate the reviews! Just a little side note, yes I am adding Dr. Aurelius into the story as well as a few other characters well known.**


	17. Chapter Seventeen: Paparazzi

**Peeta's POV**

The flashing of cameras outside our private car makes my eyes water. The lights blare blindingly through the badly tinted windows. I force the side door open and am barbarded with questions as I step out into the swarm of reporters and paparazzi. I nod to them all with my usual cheeky smile, and turn to give Katniss my hand as she follows me into the buzzing mob.

At last, she was released from the Rehabilitation Center this morning. Dr. Aurelius gave us a few parting words along with Katniss's prescribed medication and then we zoomed away in our fancy car to the Capital with all of Katniss's useless presents piled into the trunk. I don't know why we kept them. They don't matter now. I'm just happy that she was able to gain information from me about District Thirteen without getting caught by her nurse.

"How are you Katniss?" One reporter screams from the back.

"What was it like in Rehab?"

"Are you relieved to be back with Peeta?"

"Katniss! Describe your moments in rehabilitation."

I force through the crowd, keeping Katniss in front of me so I can see her in case she gets surrounded. The media is insane.

"Katniss!" They shout, ignoring my polite shaking of the head as the two of us move farther away.

I step beside Katniss and pull gently on the sleeve of her black coat, leading her away from the neverending questions and towards the marble hotel shadowing over us. She gives a slight smile to the crowd, but pulls her coat collar high over her ears. One guy with a camera steps in front and snaps a photo right in her face. Katniss blinks rapidly and stumbles back in shock. I jump in between the two of them and wrap an arm around Katniss's shoulders, steering her away from him.

"Sorry." I say to her through my barring grin. She gazes up at me quizzically, playing her part through all of this chaos. I decide this is a perfect moment for a kiss, so I lean down and lightly press my lips to hers. The cameras shutter hysterically behind us and I hear a long unison of "awwww" arise up from the many people watching us.

"Here, this way." I say after we break. The questions burst forth again, one voice shouting over the other.

"Katniss, Peeta, WAIT!" They edge closer, fencing us in like a barrier.

"Please! Katniss, we need to hear your thoughts!" I direct us closer to the hotel, not even waiting for the doorman to do his job, for I grasp the gold handle of the right door tight and pull hard.

"Katniss! KATNISS!" They chant her name as I shove us both through the glass doors, shutting out the cameras and noisy, nosy people.

I heave a sigh of relieve as we reach the elevators and Katniss shrugs off her coat, her eyes wide and her face looking overwhelmed.

"I can't believe you have to endure that everyday." She shakes her head.

"Yeah... welcome to the team." I reply, punching the "up" button.

"I didn't realize... people were that crazy about us." Katniss raises her eyebrows.

I comb a hand through my hair as we step into the elevator.

"It's uh, been insane since you've been in Rehab. The Capital has become obsessed with us."

 _President Snow knew we'd be a good distraction from the rebellion, and he was right._

I want to add, but there are listening devices and cameras all over this hotel.

Katniss nods and turns to look out the narrow window in the elevator as we fly upwards. I stare at her while she bites her lower lip and watches the buildings and people become tiny in space as we climb higher.

We reach my designated room on the eleventh floor. I step forward to scan my thumbprint onto the black panel beside the door to allow us inside. With a soft click, it unlocks.

"So, here is where I have been staying." I announce indifferently when the door swings inward. I let Katniss go in first. Her eyes glance around the main room.

I follow her inside and shut the door behind me. Katniss peeks down the long hallway and enters into my bedroom.

"Just like the Training Center." She calls.

"Similar, we do get a kitchen though." I reply, patting the island planted in the middle.

"Uh huh." She says, returning from the hallway. She plops herself down on the leather couch in the mini living room, her hands tucked under her knees. I bite the inside of my cheek and decide to join her. I seat myself down beside her, being sure to keep a good deal of distance between us in case she wants space. She's been through a lot for the past month and a half.

"What are you thinking about?" I ask quietly after a moment of silence between us. She hesitates, her eyes flickering over to me. Closing our gap between us, she reaches her arms towards me and wraps them tight around my waist. I freeze, surprised by her sudden gesture, but then engulf her with my protective embrace.

"I don't know... a lot of things." She mumbles into my chest, pressing her cheek hard against me. Goose bumps rise up my arms, but I still hold her tight.

I nod.

"I understand." Is all I say. Because I do. A blur of many thoughts and decisions have been racing through my brain, too. Being with Katniss now. Remembering how I waited aggravatingly to be with her again. My interviews with Cesar. Being forced to carry out Snow's plan. Wondering about the now burned District Twelve, and the surviving District Thirteen. Remembering my family. My mother and bothers, but mostly my dad. And also wondering what will happen to Panem with the upcoming war. I know we will have a war. The Capital can't hold off forever.

"We aren't required to do anything today." I say into Katniss's ear.

"So what do _you_ want to do?" I ask. I want to give her the choice today, because she has been robbed of that for so long.

She pulls away from my chest and stares up at me with her glittering silver eyes. They are full of wariness.

"To sleep." She answers simply.

"I'm tired, Peeta."

I answer with a firm "okay." I know the nightmares have been awful for her. She told me herself in the courtyard of the Center. I could tell by her face that it was true. I could see the concern in her eyes as she revealed to me how difficult it is without me protecting her with my presence at night. If she wants sleep, that's what I'll give her.

I take her hand and we make our way down the hall to my bedroom. I pull the silk covers off the mattress and allow her to crawl in. She sinks into the many pillows as I tuck the sheets in around her. I then cross over to the other side and lay next to her. Katniss nuzzles her head into to my arm, and I wrap my free one around her waist. My hand combs through her long hair as her eyes flutter closed.

"Sleep well, Katniss." I whisper, pressing my lips to her forehead.

Soon my eyes begin to droop after Katniss drifts off. The peacefulness and security of us being together again allows me to fall into my own dreams. Without even bothering to take of my prosthetic, I let my eye lids fall shut.

We awake around midnight, it is late, but we went to sleep around noon. I'm utterly shocked by how long we had slept. The comfort of one another had allowed us not to wake. I had no nightmares to interrupt my slumber and neither did Katniss.

I reach up to rub my heavy eyes as I struggle to sit up in bed. Katniss slides away from me and swings her legs over the bed, muttering something about using the restroom. I watch her slow, half asleep figure stagger as she makes her way across the room. I lay back in bed and stare up at the high ceiling and the chandelier dangling from its winding chord. It hovers in the darkness and catches the light from the moon peering in through the windows. It is calming to watch it as it sways in a back and forth pattern. I almost find myself dozing off again.

Just as I am about to fall asleep again, I suddenly hear a distant crash come from my right. I jerk awake. The bathroom light clicks on and shuffling comes from behind the door. I shoot up in bed.

"Katniss? Are you okay?"

 **A/N: Please don't hate me for the cliffhanger! I'll update as soon as I can! Thanks everyone for following this story!**


	18. Chapter Eighteen: Labeling Pills

**Katniss's POV**

 _Dammit_. I think, scrambling to pick up the colorless pills and broken pieces of glass scattered across the bathroom floor. No, not my normal perscribed pills, the _other_ pills. I hadn't seen the extra medication enter the bag Dr. Aurelius had given me until now.

I had just gotten up to use the bathroom, but after I was washing my hands, I was curious to look at what I thought to be four glass containers piled up with the things I had brought. My heart plummeted to my stomach when I had read the label of the _fifth_ one, the one I didn't remember taking before this. I had lost my grip on the container, my hands gave way and I had let it fall to the ground.

 _Birth Protection Pills_

No, I could have read it wrong. I _must_ have read it wrong. My fingers shake as I search for the stick-on label. It lays stuck to two shards underneath my bare feet. I bend down, and pull it apart from the pieces.

"Katniss? Are you okay?"

 _Peeta_. I crumble up the label in my hands and shove into the back pocket of my pants.

"I'm fine!" I manage to get out, scrapping together the pills and glass into my hands, not bothering about the small red lines cutting across my palms from the sharp shards. Peeta raps at the closed door a few times.

"Are you sure? What happened?" He asks through the wood.

 _Please, don't come in!_ I panic.

 _Why didn't you lock the door?!_

"Yes. I just... dropped something." I answer, dumping the contents into the nearest trash disposal under the sink. The doorknob turns, and Peeta peeks his head inside. I back up to the farthest wall, being sure not to show my bleeding hands as I press them behind me.

"I don't remember telling you that you could come in." I say tentatively, my eyes shifting across the bathroom. My gaze lands on a stray white pill near the doorway.

 _Oh, no._

I glance up at Peeta's bright blue eyes quickly and force a small smile. His face reddens.

"I'm sorry. Right, no invading privacy... I just thought you might be hurt or something." He opens the door a bit wider, scratching his hair. I shake my head.

"No. I'm alright." I lie, balling up my hands behind my back into two fists. Peeta's eyes look around the floor, finding the glittering tiny bits of glass.

"Do you need help cleaning up-" he steps forward, his foot crushing the white tablet in front of him. I wince as his eyes become wide.

"What was that?" His eyebrows furrow, stepping back from the powdered mess now splattered across the marble tile. I swallow, trying to think of a good story to make up.

"A pill." I stammer.

"I dropped a container." I blurt. He won't know which one it is, nor will he care. I'm done taking the meds anyway, it was just for show while I was in Rehab. Though, I have been tempted to keep taking the PTSD meds.

"Oh. Here, I'll clean it up." He offers, stooping down.

"No, no. Let me do it. You go back to bed." I insist, stepping over to gently push him out the door.

"Um, okay?"

He gives me an odd look, but shrugs and leaves the bathroom. I nearly sigh in relief as I shut the door. Thinking back to the label, I take it from my pocket and smooth it out.

Birth Protection Pills.

I was right. My fingers tremble as I examine the fine printing. This is some cruel joke of Snow's, I know it. He's gets to harrass me as much as he wants knowing now that I'm in the Capital. It's just enough fear to keep Peeta and I in line. At least, that's what he believes.

You take the pills to prevent having children, but you only need to take them if you are worried that you will become pregnant. And you can only become pregnant if you...

Goosebumps rise up my arms.

Snow knows Peeta and I haven't... done _that_. And he knows that we will never. That is, unless we are forced to. Is this his plan? Does he want us to take the next step? I take in a deep, shaky breath. I can't. I'm not ready.

I'm. Not. Ready.

But Snow won't wait for me to be. He'll kill my sister and everyone else in Thirteen the moment I say no.

I return to Peeta after tending to the cuts on my hands. I hope he doesn't notice, but the bleeding has luckily stopped. I decide to keep the label in the back pocket of my jeans, for I honestly don't know what to do with it. I lay awake in bed for the rest of the night, contemplating the meaning of those three horrific words stamped onto the container now in pieces.

What does Snow want from me? Does he want Peeta and I to announce that we're trying have another child after the "miscarriage?" But why the pills? They're supposed to _prevent_ me from having a baby, not influence it. Why would he taunt me with something like this? I know he ordered for someone to slip them into Dr. Aurelius's perscriptions to give to me.

 _It's because he's cruel. He enjoys watching you suffer._

The pills must be a threat of some kind. Snow knows the last thing I want to do is have kids with Peeta. The birth prevention pills were used to taunt me. To just make my reality seem more horrifying. Once Snow gives the orders, Peeta and I will be doing more than just sleeping in this bed. The pills were meant to sit on the bathroom shelf and stare me in the face as I watch my belly swell and give birth to the child of two Victors. Knowing that I can use them.

I shudder.

 _No. Don't think about it. You can't think about it._

I scoot to the edge of the bed. Something inside me makes me suddenly wish to be as far away from Peeta as possible. I know it's not his fault. He didn't ask for this either. Which is why I've concluded not to tell him about the pills. We've finally reunited after one long and aggravating month. I don't want it to become awkward between the two of us over something Snow snuck into my medication bag. He'll become just as embarrassed as I am when I explain to him the reason behind dropping the container in the bathroom.

I doze off with my head nearly hanging off the side of the bed until morning dawns. I force myself to slide closer into the center of the bed as I see myself slipping off the mattress, though I avoid even to accidentally brush Peeta.

He slides out of bed first when the light peaks into the room, looking certainly more awake then I feel as he stares down at me.

"I'm going to go make some tea... See you soon?" He half laughs, seeing that I'm in no mood to get out of bed. I force a smile and nod. He turns on his heel and I watch him go out the door.

About thirty minutes after, I make myself get up and slump slowly down the hallway to the kitchen, pressing the sleep out of my eyes with the backs of my hands.

I hear the sounds of the stove hissing as Peeta is busy with breakfast. He hums quietly, but I also catch the sound of other voices buzzing about. Peeta and I are not alone in the hotel room. I didn't hear anyone come in. Especially this early in the morning. Quickly flattening my messy hair, I step into the main room.

Three fruit-like people are chirping about on the bar stools by the countertop. One in dark purple, another in neon yellow, and the last in a deep red. They talk very fast to one another, gesturing to Peeta every once and a while. Their curls seem to bounce in unison as they bob their heads at one another's comments. I frown, examining their elaborate statures. At last I edge a step closer and clear my throat.

Peeta hears me and looks up from making his eggs.

"Katniss! Good to see you awake! These are my new stylists. Sorry they are here so early. The interview is this afternoon, you know. They are going to style you and I for Ceaser's show." Peeta explains quickly in his formal manner, a grin plastered onto his face. I play my part and waltz over to him, allowing his lips to kiss me on the cheek.

The girl in yellow shoots up from her seat.

"Katniss Everdeen! Peeta has told us so much about you! I'm Citrus, this is Kemuel, and this is Thalia." Citrus addresses to the stylists on either side of her, her face bubbling with excitement.

"Citrus, I think we can introduce one another _ourselves_. I'm Kemuel, darling." Kemuel reaches out a hand, and I give it a gentle shake as I get a good view of all his plum tattoos decorating his right arm.

"But of course!" Thalia cries, taking her turn to shake my hand as well.

"The girl on fire! Ah, how I am so glad to finally meet you in person!" She exclaims, patting my hand.

I give a polite smile.

"Thank you. It's nice to meet all of you."

In an odd way, they all make me feel the same amount of comfort I did with my old prep team. Maybe it's because they look more like fruit then people, just like my prep team resembled more to look like a flock of birds.

"So sorry we are here _so_ _early_. Peeta was going to wake you, but I told him that you should have your beauty rest." Citrus sings with a knowing smile. I nod in reply, glancing down at my crinkled jeans and rumpled shirt. Peeta and I didn't even change before we passed out, fast asleep.

"Yes, yes! You see, us Capital people usually don't even get out of bed till twelve o'clock on an average day!" Kemuel snorts, followed by a long fit of laughter from Thalia and Citrus. I honestly don't understand what makes this so hilarious, but I make myself chuckle anyway.

"Well! We must get started on prepping after breakfast then!" Citrus at last breaks from her giggling, looking over at Peeta as he divides the eggs onto plates for all of us.

"It's almost ready." He announces, setting the plates down in front of us.

"I had no idea your young man was such a good cook." Thalia tells me, eyeing Peeta as he begins to pour the cranberry juice. I follow her gaze.

"He bakes, too." I meet Peeta's eyes when he hears us talking about him. His cheeks redden slightly, but he continues to pour the juice. I bite my lip, a strange sensation welling up inside me. I don't understand the feeling, so I force it back down, quickly looking away from Peeta.

 **A/N: So again, sorry for that last cliffhanger. Hope you guys feel satisfied now by this chapter! Let you me know how you are enjoying everything so far! :** )


	19. Chapter Nineteen: Cuts and Confessions

**Peeta's POV**

"Here are the cards, just look them over so you are prepared, but Caesar is mainly going to ask some questions, so just answer truthfully. The media will want to know all the juicy stuff so make sure to be descriptive." Cynthia tells me with a wink, handing me two pink cards. One for Katniss and the other for me. I swallow, flipping them over. Neat curled handwriting dashes across the paper as Cynthia explains to me in her own words what Katniss and I will be facing in the interview.

I sit beside Katniss in the dressing room as we wait to be called backstage. It gives me painful memories of back when I was interviewed before going into the games. I slip Katniss's card onto her lap. She wears periwinkle today. A pretty color, I've always thought. I like using it to paint the shadowing of the clouds in the sky, if I can mix the other paints the right way to create the color. I wish I had a paintbrush right now. Then, I could paint away all of my nervousness before this interview.

My anxiety should be better by now in front of an audience. I've done this numerous times. Maybe it's just because there is so much on the line now. Snow will be watching our every move tonight, making sure we sell the Rehab story perfectly while still pretending to be in love.

 _It's just like it's always been. Ceaser talks a little, then you, then Katniss._

 _Act in love. Kiss. Hold hands. Talk about each other._

I sometimes wonder if I'll pretend for the rest of my life. For the rest of _our_ livesBecause her and I always do this together.

Katniss plucks up the card, her gray eyes scanning the curled letters.

"It's nothing new." I assure her, flipping the edge of my card back and forth with my forefinger. She nods.

"Yeah." She replies, continuing to stare at the pink slip.

I frown, her face seems dazed. Her mind is elsewhere right now. I can tell that she's contemplating something.

"What's wrong?" I ask quietly, reaching out to touch her arm. She flinches at me touch, her eyes suddenly alert. They soften slightly when they reach my concerned ones. My eyebrows furrow.

"What's wrong?" I repeat, more firmly.

"I-" she stops, shaking her head.

"I'm fine." She concludes, standing up apruptly.

"I think I'm just gonna go backstage... see you soon." She says, her periwinkle dress swaying as she walks swiftly out of the room, the card clutched tightly in her hand.

I sigh, burrying my face in my hands. Sometimes I just don't understand her. Katniss acts like she needs me desperately one minute, then pushes me away like some weird disease the next. Since this morning she's been acting odd. Cold. Distant. Confused. But _why_?

I feel a tap on my shoulder. I look up to see Citrus staring down at me, her artificial neon eyelashes fluttering.

"Peeta, you are going on pretty soon. Is everything alright?" She asks, placing a hand on my arm gently. Kemuel and Thalia bustle about behind her, packing up brightly colored hair curlers and elegantly shaped bottles of purfume.

"Cesar will be waiting for you." Kemuel says over his shoulder, wrinkling his nose as he chucks makeup remover cloths into the hamper by the lit mirror next to the first makeover station.

I clear my throat.

"Uh, yes. You're right. See you all soon," I say. I stand stiffly and shuffle out of the room, shutting the door quietly behind me. I bite the inside of my cheek, searching for Katniss among the assistants and other backstage crew preparing for the cameras. I duck under a great pink shoe being moved by two avoxes in black as I search for her on stage right.

"Sorry." I mutter, sliding out of the way.

"Katniss?" I call, edging closer to the bright set.

I find her leaning against a propped up light, biting her nails. I half-smile, thinking back to when Effie would scold her for doing that.

I approach her and put on my best Capitol accent.

"Katniss, how many _times_ have I told you not to bite your nails! You'll ruin the newly painted polish!" I scold her quietly. She looks up, her eyes dancing with laughter.

"Sorry Effie, I forgot." She responds innocently, then chuckling lightly.

I take her hand and observe the paint shredded off her forefinger. I make a tisk-tisk noise and she quickly snatches her fingers away.

"I can bite my nails as much as I want now. Cynthia doesn't watch us as closely as Effie did." She jokes, but I can hint the sadness in her voice. She lowers her gaze, tucking her arms behind her back.

I understand her feeling. It's the push and pull of the past. So much has happened to us, so much is lost. Districts burned, uprisings everyday now, and people suddenly gone. Not only Effie, but so many others. Wether we know where they are or not. With everyone in Thirteen, Katniss and I are alone. This is the first time we've plunged into the world of the Capital without Effie or Haymitch. Or even our own stylists, for that matter. The people we knew are either dead or refugeeing in District Thirteen.

I get a glimpse of Cesar appearing onstage, brushing off his mint green suit before settling down into one of the usual plush seats. His hair looks of bright yellow this evening, I'm guessing newly dyed. Katniss follows my gaze, her eyebrows raising at Cesar's new look.

"Good to see he's still with the trends." She mutters sourly. I can't help but laugh at her response to seeing Cesar since before the Quarter Quell. She scowls at me, but then turns to step onstage and greet him. I follow close behind.

Cesar looks like a child on Christmas when he sees Katniss approach him. He grins ear to ear and kisses both of her blushing cheeks.

"Katniss! How long it has been since we've seen one another! I can't even begin to think about where to start on asking you questions. Oh, how much has happened since our last interview!" Cesar exclaims, practically bouncing up and down with delight.

I see Katniss force herself not to raise an eyebrow as she replies:

"It's good to see you, too, Cesar."

She manages a smile and seats herself down on the loveseat across from Cesar's plush chair. I'm guessing that was brought in just for us.

"And Peeta! Good to see you again young man! Oh, but you are not so young anymore, are you. Survived two Hunger Games and engaged to this beautiful one right here!" He corrects himself, gesturing to Katniss.

I greet him similar to Katniss and seat myself down beside her, sinking into the softness of the couch. Katniss pulls out the pink card yet again, scanning Cynthia's writing. I watch her hands slightly shake as she places the card under her knee, straightening as she prepares herself for the cameras. I only realize now how nervous she is. Her chest rises and falls heavily and her silver eyes are flicking around the set as she tries to distract herself.

This is the first time I've ever seen her actually take the cards seriously, or even bother to look them over. If she makes even the slightest mistake, she'll be sentenced to prison or torture like Johanna. But I know Katniss's isn't thinking about herself, it's her family and the fate of District Thirteen she's concerned about.

My hand makes it's way across the sofa until I find hers, I grip it tight to comfort her. She glances at me, a hint of discomfort in her face. I quickly relax on my hold. I am confused. Sure, we haven't seen one another for a while, but I didn't know she'd be so sensitive to my gesture. And after her comfort in my arms yesterday after I brought her back from Rehab...

"What's wrong?" I mouth to her, being sure not to make anything too obvious in front of Cesar. Good thing is it looks like he's going over cues with the Director.

Katniss shakes her head, her face trying to remain at ease.

"Nothing." She whispers. I see her place her hand on her thigh, away from mine. Red cuts align her palm and slice across her thumb. My jaw drops slightly. She lied to me.

"Hey, you said last night that you were fine-"

"Peeta, not now." Katniss hisses, a panicked look on her face as eyes darting to her hands. She tightly folds them in her lap.

"But Katniss-" I am cut off by the Director.

"We begin in one minute, places everyone!"

"You two ready?" Cesar asks in his usual eccentric voice, settling back down into his chair and swinging his left ankle over his right knee, appearing to be right at home. I don't answer, my mind is filled with the image of Katniss's hand.

I don't have time to say anything more to her for the camera begins to roll. We are live once again.

The interview flies by, starting with the usual introductions and then jumping into the juicy news everyone has been anticipating for. Katniss. She plays her part to the best of her ability, pretending to be confused during the right moments and never failing to lean her head on my shoulder or make a sweet remark about the Capital. I realize that playing the insane girl isn't that difficult for Katniss, because it requires less dialogue. I get to do nearly all the talking and even answer some questions _for_ her.

But today I'm not doing as well as I should. Katniss's hand and what happened last night clouds my thoughts. I should have known it was more then just some pills being dropped on the ground. Katniss is also a horrible liar. I was suspicious last night, but not as much as I should have been. I guess I was just giving her the benefit of the doubt because of her difficultly these past few weeks in the Rehab Center.

I don't understand now why she has cuts all over her hands and didn't tell me about it. Why would she keep _that_ a secret?

 _Peeta, stop being so nosy. You aren't intitled to know everything that goes on in her life._

But we are in the Capital now. Things are different. I thought _we_ were different. I thought we had grown closer.

Why can't she trust me? I trust her. Doesn't she know I'm on her side, after all this time?

The interview soon concludes and the moment the camera shuts off, Katniss bounces up from the loveseat and hastily ushers a goodbye to Cesar and races off to the dressing room.

 _Shit_.

I quickly follow behind her, hardly giving Cesar a nod before I exit backstage. I've got her worried now. Katniss wasn't planning on me finding out about her hand, or whatever else she's been hiding. You'd think she would be more strategic to cover up her injuries from me.

By the time I shut the door to the dressing room, Katniss is already getting changed behind the folding screen with Cynthia and Citrus helping her. A hand flips up and the periwinkle dress flies over the screen, floating to the floor. Before I can stop it, my face reddens.

"Peeta! Come get into your departing outfit." Thalia sings, waving another fancy suit at me. Kemuel and her pull me to the other side of the room. I am stripped and then placed into another pair of tight pants, fitted with a matching blazer.

So many outfits. I think I've already worn four different pairs of clothes today, and it's hardly the afternoon.

When Katniss and I load up in our private car to head back to the hotel, she doesn't say a word to me. Her eyes stare out the window the entire time, her nose twitching every now and then. Wether she's angry, embarrassed, or even frightened, I can't tell. I want to say something to her, anything, but I wait until we are safely inside elevator and our prep team has waved us goodbye.

"Katniss." I begin, watching her stiff demeanor as she stares at the buttons next to the door blankly.

"How come you didn't tell me you were hurt?"

She bites her lip, a ding comes from above and the elevator opens.

"You... you don't need to always know everything that happens to me." She says simply, her voice slightly shaking as she steps out into the hallway and walks swiftly towards our room number. I stride to keep up with her.

"But why does it matter? You cut your hands, and you lied about it to me. _Why_ did you lie?" I press. She doesn't answer, an annoyed look playing across her face as she waits for me to unlock the door. I stare at her for a while, determination in my expression. At last, I break from her gaze and unlock the door.

She attempts to escape to the bedroom, but I catch hold of her wrist.

"Wait, you haven't given me an answer." I say, pulling her towards me, trying to stay calm.

"Peeta, let go." She grits her teeth, frustration behind her voice. There is fear in her eyes. The situation is more then she's making it appear to be.

"You're hiding something. I know." I soften my tone.

She lets out a breath, and loosens her pull away from me.

"I'm telling the truth when I say this. I dropped some pills and cut my hands." She confesses.

I nod.

"I already know that... but I also can tell that there is more to the story." I whisper, pulling her closer to me until I can smell the artificial scent of the purfume Citrus sprayed on her.

"Please, Let. Go." She replies, her jaw trembling. Those eyes break me and I do. Instead of running away like I was expecting, she takes out a small, crumpled piece of paper and shoves it into my hands. I stare down at the perfect writing.

My eyebrows crease. I clench my jaw at the words. By the time I glance back up, she's already gone. I hear the bedroom door shut down the hall. I stand in the foyer of the hotel room, my head filled with so much confusion and so many questions.


	20. Chapter Twenty: Feelings

**Katniss's POV**

My hands grip my hair angrily as I allow myself to slide down the mahogany door. I feel my heart pound inside my ribs. The moment I had let go of the label I regretted it.

 _What were you thinking?!_

I wasn't going to tell him, even if it strained our friendship. But that look on his face changed my mind. Bright blue eyes showing absolute trust. Peeta _makes_ me want to be honest with him,

wether I like it or not.

 _Birth Protection Pills._ What will he think about those words? Will he be embarrassed, upset, confused, angry even? If our relationship hasn't already become oddly intimate in an awkward way, it certainly is now. I don't know how I can possibly talk to him again.

I clench my teeth in frustration. I jerk up from my position by the door and tear across the room. Grabbing the first thing I see, which happens to be a small picture frame on the nightstand, I chuck it across the room. It shatters into a million pieces. Next, I take the lamp which was beside it and slam it into the nightstand. My hands then clench the bed covers and I wrench them from the mattress.

I look around at my mess. Breathing heavily, I crouch on the ground, my hands still shake with rage. I sit there for a few minutes, until the knob on the door quietly turns. Peeta enters the room, his hand still holding the slip of paper. His eyes flicker around the room, strangely unfazed by the scene.

Those sapphire eyes then find me, a shaking mess by the bed.

With a sudden determined look on his face, he takes the label and tears it in two. His fingers continue to rip it apart until I can't see the pieces anymore. Peeta then marches arcross the room and throws the shreds out the open window. They fly away in the breeze.

Emotion washes over me. I cup my mouth as I let out a sob. Peeta rushes over to me, his arms enclosing around me. Tears stream down my face, and I don't bother to wipe them away. They stain Peeta's shirt, soaking his chest. He doesn't mind. His hand rubs up and down my back soothingly until my face finally dries.

"It's gonna be okay. I'm here." He tells me in a strong voice. I stiffly nod, my cheek resting on his shoulder.

"P-Peeta..." I begin, wrapping my arms tighter around him.

"Shh, you don't have to explain everything to me now." He says, his fingers grazing my hair. I swallow, extracting my head from him. I stare up into his calming face.

"I found them in the medicine bag. Dr. Aurelius gave them to me. I-I don't think he knew." I reply, ignoring his comment. I don't I can handle waiting. It will explode inside of me again if I do.

Peeta's face appears concerned, he shakes his head.

"How could they just be _there_? You weren't prescribed to them... were you?" He asks, his expression a mixture of curiosity, yet fear.

"No." I answer defensively.

"But... I think Snow had somebody slip them inside the bag as-as a trick." I mutter.

Peeta's arms tighten around me.

"A trick?"

"Yes. To watch me suffer." I explain. Peeta's eyes glaze over, he ponders this. His face slowly turns panicked.

"But, that could mean-"

"I know." I reply quietly, gazing down. I can feel the heat rising up my cheeks.

Peeta brings me back to his shoulder.

"No, don't think about it. It hasn't happened yet. Snow didn't give the orders." He tells me reassuringly. I am grateful for his understanding, and even more for his comfort.

"I'm actually not surprised he'd do something like this." Peeta adds darkly.

"Being in the Capital now, we're his pawns." He spits.

I turn back up to him. His jaw is clenched in determination. Gently, he pulls away from me and heads to the bathroom.

"What are you doing?" I ask as I see him rip open the right cabinet. He scoops the invisible bottles filled with the many colored pills. He dumps them into the sleek trash can under the sink. I am taken aback as he shuts the bathroom door after completing his deed.

"You don't need them anyway." He confirms, then moving over to the nightstand to pick up the dented lamp shade and it's stand now in two.

"You don't have to do that." I say, reachinig over to take the shade from him.

"Somebody's got to clean it up." He replies with a half-hearted chuckle.

"I'll do it." I tell him, standing up.

He nods.

"And I'll help you."

After throwing away the lamp, Peeta and I straighten the sheets and remake the bed. I begin to pick up the pieces of the shattered frame I smashed into the wall, but Peeta's hand stops me.

"No, let me. You've cut yourself enough."

Bracing himself, he moves to pick up the shards.

"Wait." I say. Hurrying over to the dresser by the window, I get out two of his wool socks.

"Here, this way you won't get hurt." I tell him, taking his hands and pulling the socks over.

He grins at me.

"Good idea." He answers. I go and grab another pair for myself. We pick up the remains together and carry them to the disposal.

"I wonder how we'll get replacements. I don't _think_ anybody will notice, but..." Peeta scratches his head as he stares at the empty nightstand.

"Sorry." I mutter. I should have thought of the consequences before going into my blind rage.

"I destroy everything." I admit, staring down at my injured hands.

"No, it's alright. We all need to break things sometimes. It helps us, somehow." He answers thoughtfully. His gaze stares down at my hands. He reaches for my right wrist and brings it up to his level, examining the cuts on my thumb and palm.

"These are pretty bad. I wish we had bandages or something." Peeta says. He goes into the bathroom once more and searches around the shelves.

"Here." He calls, coming back with a small white box.

"There's a couple of things in this."

I open the box to find two clear bandages and a vile of healing cream.

Opening the vile, I slab some of the yellow-tinged goo onto my cuts. Peeta takes out the bandages and peels away the packaging, covering the worst of the injuries.

"Thank you." I whisper, feeling his soft touch as he holds my wrist still. He nods, his eyes gazing sadly at my hand. Pressing his lips upon my skin, he kisses it.

My breath hitches, I'm startled by his gesture. Though the uncomfortable feeling soon goes away and is replaced by a strange sensation rising up my spine. My newly bandaged hand catches hold of his face and I kiss his jaw lightly. I feel his arms snake around my waist.

Before I know what I'm doing my hands graze through his golden locks and I lean in farther then I should. Our lips just barely brush against one another before I slowly pull away and turn back to the room. The aggravating minutes of silence roll by until Peeta speaks.

"You want-" he clears his throat

"You want some lunch?" He asks.

I nod.

"Yeah, I'll have something." I answer, peaking over my shoulder at him. I don't want to full turn because he'll see my bright red face for sure.

"Okay."

With a slight smile he exits the room.


	21. Chapter Twenty One: The Pink Envelope

**Peeta's POV**

Katniss and I awkwardly eat our salads in silence. They were freshly made from the kitchens downstairs and brought up by a man in a white apron. I realized that all I had left in the fridge was an egg and a small pitcher of milk. Guess you have to go out to the city to buy food if you want to make meals yourself. Kind of like the Merchant's Village? Though I don't know why you'd bother with the city when you have a full sized kitchen only a few floors away.

I felt terribly haughty ordering on the intercom by the front door. All I had to do was spit out the food and how much and in less than five minutes a knock comes from outside.

I shove a piece of lettuce my mouth. It tastes oily and sprinkled with salt, but it doesn't get rid of the lasting taste of her lips. I can still feel them pressed gently against mine and I can't erase the image of her blushing cheeks from my mind.

We kissed. But what it means, I don't know. Did she kiss me just because I kissed her hand? Was it a "thank you" because of my help? Was it out of pity? Out of love? My mind is still trying to figure Katniss out.

Her emotional state is not great right now, so I'm not going to take advantage of it, of _her_. I just wish I could get inside her head and understand her feelings.

I look across the bar counter to see Katniss munching away, nearly done with her lunch.

"It's good?" I ask, swallowing.

She nods.

"I don't think Capital food could ever be bad." She replies, her mouth full.

I agree. I kind of feel guilty eating it though. When we were training for the games I felt like we deserved the food because we were going to die anyway, but now I'm not fighting for District Twelve or filling myself up in order to do so.

I clear our plates when we are finished. Both of us lean against the kitchen counter, unsure of what to do now.

"We're free for the rest of the day." I tell her, though I know she's already aware of this.

"Yeah... what do we do now?" She asks with a chuckle.

"I don't know. When do we ever get free time?" I admit. With Cynthia and the prep team not at our heels, we have some down time before the next event.

"Wanna watch something?" I suggest, peering over at our untouched screen embedded into the wall across from the comfy couch.

"Sure." Katniss answers, grabbing a blanket from beside the sofa and settling down. I grab the slim remote on the coffee table and set myself down beside her. She throws the blanket over us both.

The screen dims, and then lights up in a happy blue color. I instantly think of the channel we'd both like to tune in to, for the rebellion can always get a hold of it and broadcast their secret propos.

I turn to Katniss and pulling away her flowing dark hair, I whisper into her ear.

"District Thirteen can always break into channel 246, do you want to see anything?" I ask her. She must be dying for news. Her eyes widen.

"But, cameras," She mouths, glancing around the room.

I shake my head.

"They only face us, not the screen-I've checked," I explain hastily under my breath.

Katniss nods in reply.

I flip to the channel number.

 _Please, let there be anything broadcasting today._

We are so hungry for news, but especially Katniss. If District Thirteen could say anything today, just to reassure her...

The screen remains blank as we wait. I anticipate for Finnick or President Coin or _anyone_ to appear. A crackling sound comes and the screen turns grainy.

I sigh.

"They cut the channel from our room," I spit.

"I'm not surprised." Katniss replies quietly, folding her arms.

"They're forcing us to avoid District Thirteen as much as possible," I say, shaking my head.

"Yeah... maybe it's best if we don't try to sneak peeks at the screens. It will just get us into trouble with Snow." Katniss admits, leaning back into the cushions of the sofa.

Guilt creeps up within me upon hearing her.

"You're right, but don't you want news? You haven't heard anything for weeks not including what I told you, that is," I protest with a frown.

"I don't want to know anything if it's going to cause issues. The safety of Thirteen depends on _us_." She whispers that last sentence, because of not wanting be be overheard by listening devices or fear of the burden we have, I don't know.

"Okay, I understand." I say, gently draping an arm across her shoulders. Surprisingly, she leans into me, her head resting on my chest.

We sit in quiet for a while, and soon Katniss drifts off with her head still resting on me. I absentmindedly stroke her hair, thinking about another way we could see District Thirteen's broadcasts without getting caught.

I am startled by a brisk knock at the door. Katniss jerks awake, her head slamming into my chin. I wince.

"Ow," I say, rubbing my jaw.

"Sorry Peeta!" She exclaims, her mouth gaping.

"It's fine, I'll get the door." I chuckle over our accident, scooting up from the couch and striding over to the door.

I pull it open to find a tall, skinny man standing before me with ridged cheekbones holding a silver tray with his gloved hand.

"An invitation addressed to room 1147," He announces in a professional manner, holding out the tray to me. A coral pink envelope lays neatly upon it.

I clear my throat.

"Um, thank you... very much," I say, hesitantly taking the invitation from him.

He nods and turns on his heel to leave.

I shut the door and head back over to Katniss, who still lays curled up on the couch.

"What was that all about?" She asks, a usual eyebrow raised.

"Uh, I guess we've been invited to something." I explain, showing her the pink envelope.

Katniss takes her fingers and starts to peel the paper away, ripping it until the sparkling card shows beneath. With an concerned face, she yanks the card from the teared envelope.

 _To Mr. Peeta Mellark and Miss Katniss Everdeen_

 _You both are cordially invited to the annual Capital Masquerade Ball!_

 _This yearly ball commemorates some of our most memorable victors, gamemakers, and sponsors who have honored the Capital in participating or contributing to the Hunger Games._

 _Sunday October 24th_

 _5:30PM to 2:00AM_

 _The President's Mansion_

 _*Dinner and nightly hors d'oeuvres will be served_

 _President Snow himself will also be presenting many of our prized contributors with special gifts to honor them for their service to the Capital._

Katniss sets the card on the edge of the couch, rubbing her forehead.

"Okay," She mutters.

I swallow.

"That's in two days."

"I know," She replies, glancing up at me as a clear scowl traces across her face.

I can't help but laugh.

"You really don't like dressing up, do you?"

She shakes her head, a smile creeping up her face.

"I despise it."

 **A/N: Sorry everyone for the wait! I've been pretty busy lately, but I finally had time to write! I've got some good things coming up in this story so stay tuned! Thx!**

 **-AvaLizzie**


	22. Chapter Twenty Two: Masquerade

**Katniss's POV**

I stand in front of the mirror leaning against the bedroom wall, watching my waist become smaller and smaller by each tug Cynthia makes on the strings of the corset. I can hardly breathe. I think my lips are practically turning blue.

Cinna never made me wear corsets for events. He said my body was perfect just the way it was. He also told me that I should still represent my district, for people _there_ don't walk around with twenty inch waists.

"Can't... we loosen it... just a l-little?" I sputter, gripping the frame of the mirror. Cynthia takes out the measuring tape from her pocket and wraps it around my waist.

"Hm, I think that's the size we want... are you sure? It will loose some of the definition with the way the dress falls on you." She purses her lips.

I side glance at Thalia, who is currently preparing my gown laying out on the bed. Snow will want me to look as Capital-like as possible for the Masquerade Ball. It would probably be wise to do what Cynthia suggests.

"Okay, we-we can leave it." I manage to get out, straightening myself as I have another look in the mirror. Unlike the other times I've been prepped, I seem completely transformed from what I once looked like. I see another firgure in the mirror-a painted doll, like the ones I used to see little girls carry around in the Merchant's Village, but could never actually own one myself.

My eyes glitter with heavy makeup and my cheekbones and chin have been chiseled by the contour brush into the desired, perfect shape. My lips bear a rose color and my skin isn't olive anymore. They powdered me bare before I got into my underclothes.

The worst thing they did was dye my hair. I'm a blonde now-an unrecognizable color compared to my dark locks. Cynthia promised that it was temporary. It should wash out in the shower, but... it's a shocking thing to see. Oddly, I've never loved my natural look more until now.

Soon, I slip into my heeled shoes and the cage of a dress is carefully pulled over me by the two Capital women in the bedroom.

I gaze into the mirror one last time. My grey eyes swirl in the mix of color surrounding me and I force myself to shut my eyes, hiding the new image of myself from view. I can almost imagine a perfectly iced cake inside the Mellark bakery window in place of the myself-for that's what I mostly resemble in this dress.

It's a disappointment compared to what Cinna has able to design in the past. Unlike his creations, this dress doesn't speak to me. There is no important message to send to the Districts. I'm no longer a symbol for them.

"Oh! Doesn't she look like the Belle of the ball?" Thalia squeals, arranging my powdered curls to frame my neck.

"Who's that?" I ask.

"Oh, never mind... it's a beautiful costume!" Thalia compliments Cynthia, who is still eyeing the trim on my hip skeptically.

"Thank you," She replies, blinking away her thoughts.

"Well! On to see how Peeta's turning out!" Cynthia exclaims, briskly leaving the room. He is getting ready in the sitting area.

After Thalia touches up my makeup and shoves me through the narrow doorway, I am able to see the rest of the prep team and Peeta waiting by the front door.

Peeta's eyes grow double in size when he sees me approach him.

"You look-not yourself." He answers matter-of-factly, careful not to sound surprised in front of the others. I half smile in return, staring at his embroidered suit and crisp white gloves. Unlike me, _he_ didn't have to put on a pound of makeup and be dunked in white powder to appeal to everyone.

"Thanks." I say, biting the inside of my cheek.

"The cars are waiting!" Citrus announces.

Cynthia and the prep team hastily shove us out the door. Soon Peeta and I are ushered inside the fancy vehicles and taken away to President Snow's mansion.

We reach the sparkling white front steps and Kemuel pulls out our custom masks, tying them to our faces. I wonder now why Cynthia even bothered to do my makeup if it was all meant to be covered up.

"Now, be sure not to take off your masks till President Snow announces your names to come up and receive the gifts bestowed for you." Cynthia reminds us as we take the first steps up to the great oak doors.

"They will also check your invitation." She hands the coral card to Peeta.

Our prep team begins to step away and a sudden shoot of panic surges through me.

"Where will you all be?" I ask.

I've never been to any event without my prep team or Effie close at hand. I didn't realize until now how much security they gave me. They helped me if I got confused and never failed to tell me what and what not to do. I'm not ready for the exposure without them.

Cynthia gives me a look. Her eyes shifting from Peeta to me.

"I'm-I'm not sure what you mean?"

"Aren't you coming with us?" I press, moving down a step.

Peeta reaches for my arm.

"Hey, it'll be okay." He tells me quietly. I swallow, looking back at him.

Cynthia clutches my left hand.

"Don't worry dear, we'll be in the dressing rooms on the lower floor. We weren't invited to the ball." She assures me, though she lowers her eyes.

 _I wish you all were._ I want to say.

They shuffle down the paved road and around the corner of the front gardens, leaving to find the stylists' entrances. I watch them go until they disappear behind Snow's signature white rose bushes.

Peeta holds out his arm for me, his blue eyes full of reassurance through his glittering mask.

"You'll be fine." He says as I take his arm. I nod, picking up as much of my dress as possible without pulling the fabric above the ankle. It will be a miracle tonight if I don't trip in this thing.

I take in a deep breath.

"Okay... let's go in."

Chandeliers hang glittering above us as we wait on the long red carpet to enter the ballroom. Two Peackeepers stand guard outside the doors, checking invitations. The line moves quickly as more and more people are ushered inside. We reach the Peacekeepers soon enough and Peeta hands over our pink card, a usual teeth showing smile on his face.

"Ah! Mr. Mellark and Ms. Everdeen, right this way." The one on the right says in a welcoming manor, showing us through the door.

"Thank you." Peeta responds.

"My pleasure. Good to see you both!" The Peacekeeper calls as we make our way into the ballroom.

"We're getting more popular." I mutter to Peeta our of the corner of my mouth.

"You think? Did you see that swarm of paparazzi outside the hotel? The numbers are growing." Peeta shakes his head.

"Yeah, I guess that's what Snow wh-"

The amazing appearance of the room stops me in my tracks.

Chandeliers far bigger then the ones in the hallway dangle in silver and gold from the ceiling, blinding me with all their light. Pillars adorn each side of the room draped in streamers of glittering silver and deep purple.

The buffet table stands long and narrow beside the enormous glass window at the head of the room. Cakes tower with fruit and frosting of every color on one end as champagne overflows dozens of diamond cups on the other. Dinner overtakes the middle with soups of every flavor as delicious and obscure dishes of meat and noodles surround them. I have to close my mouth to stop myself from drooling just at the sight of it all.

I can already feel my corset constrict as I remember how little I'll be able to stuff myself with before I become sick. Though I look around and see that I'm not the only one who is wearing a restrictive dress. Ladies adorned with pearls and lace and wearing wigs of colors I didn't even know existed lounge about beside the buffet already drinking viles of pink liquid. Surely they aren't only eating one meal.

I turn to Peeta who is admiring the perfectly frosted cakes. His expression is looking very similar to mine.

"This is beyond any Victory Tour event we've ever been to." He mumbles, his eyes frozen on the desserts.

"I know." I agree.

Sweet music begins to flow like a river from the high balcony above. I look up to see many musicians playing violins and flutes and... other instruments. Most of them I don't recognize, but the sound is strangely beautiful and I want to sway.

"Should we dance?" I ask Peeta.

 _What else do you do at a party other than dance and eat?_ I wonder.

But then again, that's all the Capital people do. Plus be entertained by us-the Districts.

"Of course." Peeta replies with a smile, snapping out of his trance. He takes my waist and we waltz off onto the floor.

People soon join us, wearing masks similar to ours. The identity of everyone is a secret. I can't begin to guess who anyone is. Not that I'd know anybody in particular, but if Snow were to be one of these people dancing and watching my every move, I wouldn't know.

I tense. Peeta feels me.

"What?" He whispers, his face close to mine. We waltz with nearly no space between us.

"I don't know where Snow is," I admit.

"Look behind you," He tells me. I glance over my shoulder. Snow sits in a great chair on a platform, speaking with three other individuals. As far as I can tell, he hasn't seen me yet.

I let out a breath.

"Good." I mutter.

Peeta tightens his grip on me.

"We can move over to the food if you want. It's farther away." He suggests.

 _Okay good, so he's hungry too._

"Good idea."

Peeta and I sniff the sweet aroma of the heavenly food as we make our way over. We start at one end and make our way across, filling our plates with different delectable courses. Peeta strays behind me as I finish before him. I've already taken everything on the table that my stomach can manage, so I find a quiet place for us to eat behind the pillars where the chandeliers don't shine as brightly. Peeta follows me soon after. I frown at him when I see his towering plate.

"Sorry." He chuckles, faking a pouty face.

"You'd be scowling to if your stomach was constricted to a mere 20 inches!" I shoot back. How come men's dress code is so lax compared to women's here?

"Okay, I'm sorry for real." He says cracking a smile, sitting beside me. The two embroidered chairs we sit in match all the others in the ballroom. Instead of sitting at an enormous dining table, the Capital people rest themselves about the room in lounging sofas and comfortable chairs. I'm glad it's like this though. I'm glad we're alone.

I try the many clumps of food on my plate, savoring every bite until my waist strains against the corset even though only half of my dinner has been consumed. I set down the plate on the tiny table beside us against the great pillar.

Peeta looks over to me, munching away on a strange looking fruit.

"Full?" He mumbles, his mouth filled with the stuff.

"Uh huh," I say, leaning back into my chair.

"Have you ever tasted this before? It's amazing!" He exclaims, holding out a stringy yellow piece. I eye it curiously.

"I've never even _seen_ a fruit like that," I admit.

"Here, try it," He holds it up to my mouth.

I scrunch my nose, shaking my head.

"I told you, I'm full." I say.

"Come on, just one bite. You can blame me if you puke." He laughs. I roll my eyes, but take a bite from his hand. A bittersweet taste explodes in my mouth. A tangy flavor, sweet and yet sour at the same time.

"Mmm, it's good," A smile creeps up my face.

"Told you," He smirks, popping the rest into his mouth.

"I hope you two are enjoying the ball." A shrill voice says from behind us. I jerk around. A couple sits in the pair of chairs near the following pillar, wearing exotic bird-like outfits and masks completely covering their faces. The lady nods to me.

"Uh thank you," I answer hesitantly. She and her partner hop up, gliding over to Peeta and I.

"Pardon me from interrupting, but I just had to meet you both! Sifa Lucia. This is my husband Kosmo. How we have waited to talk you!" She reaches out for my hand. I shake her gloved fingers, and so does Peeta.

"We own the apparel outlets near the forum of the city. Kosmo designs leather wear." She smiles at her husband. Kosmo nods, remaining quite stoic. I can't tell wether he is angry or shy under that feathered mask.

"That sounds interesting, you both must know our stylist, Cynthia Eckel?" Peeta asks, quickly obtaining his charming aura as he keeps the conversation flowing.

"Why yes! New this year, she replaced an old stylist from last year's games." Sifa nods.

Her voice sounds strange to me. I don't know why, but I feel like I've met her before. Maybe at some other Capital party?

"Oh, yes... I understand there must have been some replacements." Peeta replies, his voice quiet. I swallow, painfully reminded of Cinna.

"Yes, well... might I congratulate you both on your survival from the 75th games. It did not turn out as I expected, but here are you both yet again! Amazing the Capital with your perseverance and love!" She exclaims, her voice filling with awe.

"Thank you." I repeat, not sure exactly what to do with this woman. I glance up at her husband. He looks over at Sifa, clearing his throat.

Sifa recollects herself.

"Well, I wish we could talk more, but President Snow is going to speak soon-I want to get a good view! Though, I would love to talk with you both again and here about how the Capital is treating you! Here is our card."

Kosmo flips a card out of a hidden pocket inside his down blazer, sliding it to me.

 _Lucia Apparel and Accessories_

I look up to see them disappeared. Gone as fast as they came, mixed with the sea of elaborate dresses and suits. I give Peeta a look.

"Do you know what that was all about?" I ask him.

He shrugs.

"People know who we are here. I'm actually kind of surprised they recognized us."

"Yeah..." I look over the card again, and then stuff it down the front of my dress, not sure what else to do with it.

The music dies from up above. I hear murmuring from the dance floor.

"I think it's time for President Snow to speak." Peeta tells me, abruptly standing. I sigh, holding out my hands from him to help me. It was hard enough sitting down!

"Up you get." He says, pulling me to my feet in two tries.

"Thanks," I breathe, wincing as my corset slightly cuts into my side.

"Here, this way." He replies.

 **A/N: Just a fun little fact, the fruit Peeta gave Katniss was a pineapple. :) Hope you guys are enjoying the story so far, the pace will be picking up pretty soon!**


	23. Chapter Twenty Three: District Thirteen

**Peeta's POV**

His distinct, rough voice calls us from the golden platform. Snow stands powerfully over the party-goers of the Capital. Katniss and I obey him, following the parting path of the river of ballgowns and suits. I walk up the three steps first, and then turn back to take Katniss's hand and escort up after me.

One velvet box is presented to us by two Gamemakers from the 75th Hunger Games. They smile politely and hand us our gift, but behind their eyes I can see the look of authority. It's the same look Snow has shown us too many times before.

 _You are only alive and here because we need you to distract everyone from the real problems. If you screw up, it's over._

I guess we aren't fooling _everyone_ in the Capital with our act. Snow isn't the only one waiting for us to make the wrong move.

The boxes are opened with grins and Katniss and I find ourselves thanking Snow for two silver wedding rings.

"Why not make it official? After all, you both did get married in secret." President Snow explains more to the people below rather than us with a wink. The crowd follows in hysterical laughter, partially drunk.

As he continues with his mini speech on our love story and our contribution to the games, my nostrils become filled with his sickly scent. It wafts off his crisp white suit and makes my eyes well up. It's horrible, but at least I can manage it. I can see Katniss's face turning green even under the mask and heavy makeup.

Not at all surprised by our gifts, I slip the smaller ring onto Katniss's powdered finger. As my hand touches hers, I have the intense desire to rub her skin clean of the white stuff so to see her beautiful olive skin beneath. Instead, I imagine that she and I have just baked a cake and her hands are covered in the flour instead.

We smile lovingly at one another and share a usual kiss before descending from the platform. As we reach the dancfloor, I glance at Katniss to find her watching President Snow. Like I've seen some times before, they share a secret conversation with one another in just one look.

At last they break trance and Katniss stares at the ground uncertainly. I place a hand on her arm.

"Hey, you okay," I murmur. She snaps out of it, her grey eyes fluttering up to my blue ones through the elaborate mask. They are the only things that reassure me that she's actually Katniss. Everything else our prep team has changed.

"Yeah... let's dance some more."

So we do. Dance. Drink Champagne. Dance some more. How I wish this party would end sooner. I fight to rub my eyes as Katniss and I sway to some sad violin up on the balcony. The mask feels sticky against my face and my muscles ache. The champagne isn't helping either. Three glasses and I already feel like Haymitch. How he sulks in his drunken state so often, I don't know.

Katniss drops against my shoulder, her body weak with fatigue. I try to keep her up right with the strength I have left while still maintaining a pleasant face when all I really want to do is scowl at everyone here like so often Katniss does.

When the ball ends, I take her by the hand and lead her out into the red carpeted hallway. She mumbles something about her feet hurting so I bend down to unbuckle her dangerous-looking heels. She takes them from me and holds the ends in her right hand as her body is engulfed by the cupcake dress due to the lack of height.

Our prep team comes to us, thank God, and we load back up into the sleek black cars. Cynthia chats the whole way back to the hotel, demanding to know every detail of the party. Who was there, what food they served, the decorations, the outfits, President Snow. I try to answer her questions, yet wishing to remain quiet without being rude. Katniss is already asleep on my lap so she's left me with all of the talking. Well... she always leaves me with all of the talking.

Getting out of our outfits and makeup is hell once we reach our room. Katniss and I are half-asleep as Citrus and Kemuel remove the embroidered outfits and restricting underclothes to shape our bodies. When they leave, Katniss doesn't even bother taking a shower to get the dye out of her hair. Slumping over to the bathroom, she wets a washcloth and smears the makeup across her face.

I do the same after her and then find some pajamas to put on. Forgetting our privacy, Katniss and I strip down to our underwear and pull on whatever we find in the dressers. She ends up in my shirt and I can only find the pants to my pjs.

Doesn't matter. We collapse on the bed anyway. The moment my head hits the pillow I'm out.

A strange dream of Sifa and Kosmo handing me their apparel card occurs. I fly over Snow's mansion holding the white card between my teeth. Soaring past the Capital and over the Rocky Mountains, at last I land deep in a valley filled with pine trees and brush. I pull the card out of my mouth and examine it once more. Instead of the silver printed letters reading _Lucia Apparel and Accessories_ I read a strange code in the color of blood: _D13_.

Her familiar screams awaken me. Dragged out of my dream and back to reality I jolt awake. Katniss thrashes beside me, tears streaming down her face. Still trapped in her horror, I grab her forearms and attempt to shake her awake. Her eyes snap open, wild with fear.

"Hey, hey, you're okay," I say, pulling her stained blondish brown hair out of her face. The dye is rubbing off. She breathes heavy, finding my eyes. Giving a stiff nod, her body sinks into mine. I wrap my arms tightly around her, feeling her heart pound against her ribs as we press together.

She shakes uncontrollably until I calm her down.

"I-I'm sorry," she sputters, looking back up at me. I shake my head.

"Don't be... do you want to talk about it?" I ask her.

She swallows.

"It's-It's nothing you h-haven't heard. Just... Snow and my f-family and pills," She looks down embarrassingly. A knot builds in my stomach and I kiss her forehead. I had forgotten about the pills since yesterday. _Another_ thing we have to remember to be aware of.

How can we live like this? Hiding in fear and threatened by Snow everyday, reminding us how easily we can fail. All I want is that the projectors would broadcast the District Thirteen propos, but Snow has made sure to keep Katniss and I away from the rebellion as much as possible-giving us no way out, no way to rebel.

I stare down at Katniss in my arms. The only reason stopping me from resisting from the Capital is to keep her safe and fulfill her wishes of protecting Thirteen.

My jaw clenches. How long have we suffered? Too long. How long have we play pretended? Since the beginning. Something has to change, something must break through. When will the rebellion strike? How much longer will it take them to attack the Capital and start the war full on? Or... have they already and Snow has been covering it all up?

So much information I wish I had, yet have been stripped of. If I wanted to know more, I'd be risking the safety of Katniss and her family.

Katniss leans over and coughs into her arm, her throat dry from the screaming.

"Here, let's go get you a glass of water." I pull her out of bed and lead her to the bathroom.

 **A/N: Just a heads up, this chapter is posted along with chapter 24-so enjoy the double dose! Thanks my peeps!**


	24. Chapter Twenty Four: All That Matters

**Katniss's POV**

Peeta returns from the kitchen with a crystal glass and fills it with water from the sink. I slide onto the counter and perch there as he hands me the glass. I gulp it down, realizing how thirsty I am. Peeta watches me with a stern look, his arms folded.

"What?" I ask with a raised eyebrow.

He blinks.

"Sorry, I was thinking... do you still have the card those people gave us at the party?"

I shrug.

"It's over by the dressers, probably on the floor or something," I admit.

He exits the bathroom, but quickly returns with the desired square of paper.

He flips it over hastily, examining the back.

"Oh my God," He mutters.

"What?"

Peeta folds the paper hard and then turns to approach me, places his hands on my bare legs and leaning forward.

"Sorry, but the listening devices will hear," He whispers into my ear.

"Okay," I answer, scooting closer to him so I sit on the edge of the counter. I wrap my arms around his neck.

"I had this dream-about the card. And it-it read a code. D13. When I read the card just now, the code was written on the back. It's got to mean District Thirteen," he explains hastily into my ear.

I furrow my eyebrows.

"I don't understand. D13? Why would that be there?" I ask him. It's obviously a sign of the rebellion, but wether it's a _real_ sign or just a trap...

"Sifa and Kosmo must be in on the rebellion. They were trying to give us a clue. Maybe a sign to help us?" His breath tickles my neck. I tighten my grip on him.

"But how can we know for sure? Peeta, you and I both know that Snow is out to get us. He's waiting for us to fail. We can't expose ourselves, even if it _is_ a sign-which I doubt."

We can't be apart of this revolution. There's too much at risk. My family, District Thirteen, even Peeta will be at the hands of the President.

"Yes, if it _is_ , shouldn't we do something about it?" Peeta presses.

I shake my head slightly.

"We can't. Not now. Peeta-Snow is watching our every move!" I say, my voice slightly breaking above a whisper. I have to admit that I'm scared about even talking about this. Snow could find out that Peeta and I even spoke about the rebellion.

Peeta moves his head back to look at me.

"There has to be something we can do." He mouths.

"No, there isn't." I insist.

 _We need to drop this_

"Why do you say that?" He shoots at me, suddenly frustrated.

"Because, there's no way out! We have to do what we have to do to keep Thirteen out of harms way. Remember Peeta, Snow could have thrown me in prison or worse, wherever Johanna is!" I hiss at him. How can he not understand this? Hasn't he seen Snow's power enough to understand that we can't taunt the enemy?

His fingers press deeper into my thighs as he leans forward. A shiver runs down my spine.

"That's why we figure out a way to contact Thirteen-so we don't have to be threatened anymore. I don't want _you_ to be threatened anymore."

I jerk back from his close contact with me.

"Peeta, this isn't about me."

"No, it _is_ about you. I need to-to-"

"To what?" I shoot at him.

He grabs my head and presses his forehead against mine.

"You are all that matters to me. I want you to live a better life than this. You've been forced to do what the Capital wants for too long. You should be able to choose what you want." He tells me, his gaze so deep I'm afraid he can see into my very soul.

I break it by closing my eyes, feeling the warmth of his hands on my cheeks.

"I can't choose."

The warmth rushes away as he leaves. Out of the bathroom and maybe even out of the bedroom-I don't know. My heart beats rapidly as I slide off the counter. My head is buzzing with thoughts, I can't concentrate on one.

After several minutes of what seems like dillusion, I move. My bare feet feel cold against the tile and I shiver in Peeta's cotton shirt as I creep over to the door, taking in a shaking breath. I peek around into the bedroom.

He's not there.

I'm not about to go looking for him. So instead I crawl back into bed, curling up into a ball and staring blankly out the window across from me. It's all of the sudden freezing in the sheets. The heat and comfort of once sleeping bodies has evaporated into thin air.

When I awake in the morning, my fingers and toes are colder than a corpse's and he's still not beside me. I try to contain my worries as I slide out from under the covers, heading to the dressers to pull on some wool socks in the top drawer. I find relief in their warmth around my feet as I hastily slip them on.

I find myself creeping down the hallway, desperately hoping that Peeta is at the stove, making breakfast as usual and giving me a sweet smile when our gazes meet.

But it's quiet. The hotel room doesn't make a noise.

 **A/N: This is probably one of the worst cliffhangers I'll give you all and I'm so sorry! I don't like doing this, but, I believe, this is the best way to tell the story. Please, hang in there everyone! Btw, hope you all had a good Halloween! :)**


	25. Chapter Twenty Five: A Proposition

**Peeta's POV**

My footprints sink into the velvet carpet as I walk down the hallway. Away from the hotel room, away from her. I throw a sweatshirt over my shoulder on the way out and I shove it over my head now as I tread to the elevator. Thinking back I didn't even bother shutting the room door behind me.

My fist slams into the "down" button. Maybe I can get a drink at the bar by the lobby? Age limits are pretty lenient here in the Capital. I can probably pursuade the Bar Tender. I'll do anything to forget our conversation.

The elevator reaches the lobby with a happy ding and I burst out from the sliding doors, spotting the dim lit area labeled _Bistro_ across from the breakfast lounge. 3am and it's open.

Sitting on one of the spinning stools, I look around for the tender. A sleepy man with a faded green handlebar mustache trudges over to me from the back. Not even checking my face, he mumbles.

"Whatcha be havin'?"

I swallow. I don't know the names of the alcohol they serve drink here. My eyes scan the rows of drink options behind him. I point at a green bottle matching the Bar Tender's mustache to the right.

He grunts and pops the cork open, spilling the contents into a shot glass for me and then exiting behind the rows shortly.

It goes down harder than I expect when I sip the drink. I clench my teeth to force myself not to cough uncontrollably. Definitely not your easy glass of champagne. I finish it nevertheless. Unlike last night, my shun from alcohol has worn off. Maybe this is how Haymitch feels after getting drunk. Though he think he enjoys being hungover, in which case I can't imagine why.

My mind finally wanders back to Katniss sitting there on the bathroom counter in my t-shirt. I let out a sigh. I probably should go back upstairs. I've most likely scared her with the way I've acted. I shouldn't have suggested defying Snow. I know it's impossible to join the rebellion anyhow without getting caught. But, just for a moment, I felt a surge of hope when I saw the code on that card.

She's right though. She can't choose. No matter how much she wants to. Her family and Thirteen have to be protected and she's chained to the future of both. And I'm chained to her.

I slide my glass away from me, standing up to leave. I don't bother paying, it will just go on my tab anyway. One thing I still don't have to worry about since becoming a victor is paying for stuff.

As I am about to step into the elevator, I am stopped by two Peacekeepers coming down the hall. Faces stoic and bodies tense.

"Mr. Mellark," One calls. I force myself not to put my foot between the door as I watch the lift descend upwards, turning to face them as they approach me.

"The President is in the Conference Room on the lobby floor. He would like a word with you."

Neither are wearing their helmets in the building tonight. The older one has jet black hair and a small scar on his lip, and the other younger one has tiny freckles brushed across his nose.

I nod. I'll go with them, for whatever reason Snow wants to meet with me, but I feel guilty for leaving Katniss in our room. She probably doesn't even know where I went.

"Alright, but could I just go tell my-"

"It won't be long. I assure you, you'll be back with Ms. Everdeen soon," The older one assures, his jaw tight.

I let in a breath, then breathe out.

"Okay," I agree.

The two escort me as usual, leading me to where the President is in close formation so to grab me if I do something unexpected. I don't. I obey and follow.

Door slightly ajar, they usher me in and shut it hard behind. Standing in the dim room, I glance around wondering where I will find his snake-like eyes and drawling voice.

"Over here," he calls.

I squint to see him at the end of a long mahogany table, sitting in one of the plush rolling chairs in the dark.

I clear my throat.

"I'm sorry. It's dark in here," I say, making my way over as my eyes adjust.

"No need. Only the manager knows I'm here. I thought it best not to... cause a scene. You already have so much publicity as it is," He chuckles as I take a seat.

I nod.

 _Remain calm._

"So you needed to speak with me?" I ask as politely as possible. Snow gives a smile.

"Yes, I have something to discuss with you. Just the next step of our arrangement, nothing major really," He replies casually.

I swallow, feeling the uncomfortableness of the situation engulf me. Something's telling me that it is in fact definitely going to be major.

"Alright... shouldn't you have called Katniss here, too?" I ask suddenly, coming to think of it.

Snow nods slowly.

"Yes, but I felt that this was a man-to-man discussion. If you know what I mean," He says with a smirk. I want to recoil at his response.

 _What does that mean?_

"Alright, so..."

"Mr. Mellark, the Capital has absolutely adored you and Ms. Everdeen's so far performance. You have convinced everyone here with your love and happiness as usual and the media is eating up every juicy detail of Ms. Everdeen's rehab and then her wonderful reunion with you... that is to say, I am feeling pleased."

Some tension releases from my stomach.

"Well, if you are thanking me President Snow, then-"

"Not _just_ thanking you. I also have a proposition to make," He interrupts.

"A proposition?"

"Yes. You see, now that Katniss and you are living happily in the Capital and are free to love one another, I think it's time to take the-next step. Don't you?" Snow's lip curls at one end.

I can almost physically feel the color drain from my face.

"The-the next step?" I manage.

"Yes. I know it's not Springtime, but anytime is a good time for new life and of course everyone loves a publicized baby shower. So, when shall we plan it?"

My words gets caught in my throat. I want to answer, but can't. It's slowly occurring to me now what this meeting is really about.

"Mr. Mellark? Did you hear me? When should we plan the baby shower? Or should I say, when should the date be to make the announcement?" Snow asks simply, folding his hands on top of the table.

"A-announcement? For what?" I'm dumbfounded, though I don't know why. I saw this coming. I _knew_ it was coming the moment Katniss revealed to me that medication label. Yet I tore it up and threw it out the window. I refused to think of it. For the sake of her.

President Snow gives a good hearted laugh, which turns into a deadly cough as he takes out a handkerchief, covering his blood spurting mouth. When he finishes, he speaks again:

"Why boy, didn't you anticipate this moment coming? Announcement of the pregnancy, of course. You and Ms. Everdeen are very much in love, aren't you? And don't say no, I saw you both just a few hours ago in the hotel bathroom." He chuckles, leaning back into his chair.

My eyes widen as the shock takes over. No, this can't be happening. Not now. When all I wanted was for Katniss to be free from all of this.

"Um-I-I..." My vision blurs as I blink away the colorful stars. How can we get out of this? Katniss can't get pregnant. It will ruin her. She's not ready and I would never do that to her. She never wanted to get married in the first place, let alone have children. And under the command of the Capital? Not to mention the process...

My stomach contorts.

 _But this may be the only way to protect Thirteen._

Katniss may agree. I know she is willing to do anything for the people she loves. Even if that means sacrificing herself to something she never wanted.

 _No, you can't give in._

It doesn't matter if she will agree or not. I won't let her do this. I'm done watching her hand herself over to Snow. I'm done with him threatening her.

I remember what my mind had processed when I was having my drink. Katniss is chained to her family and Thirteen. I am chained to her.

I can refuse and take the punishment without hurting Katniss and her family. I just simply have to unchain myself from her. Then she can stay safe and be spared from the impending hell.

"No. I'm sorry President Snow, but I cannot grant your proposition. You can punish me, crush my bones and make me bleed to death and then have me rot in jail on top of it, but I'm not doing that to Katniss."

Snow's expression does not change, but his eyes darken like a demon taking over.

"You may go." He hisses.

I push away from my seat and rush out of the room, feeling my heart pound in my head.


	26. Chapter Twenty Six: Treason

**Katniss's POV**

Dumbfounded by finding the kitchen filled with no scent of eggs and waffles and seeing no sight of a blonde haired, blue eyed figure, I trudge back into the bedroom, slipping on a pair of pajama pants which I failed to pull on last night before collapsing in bed.

 _He must be downstairs._

My mind concludes as I decide to open the front door leading out into the hallway. It doesn't matter what happened between us, it's important that I find him now. We will never survive this on our own in the Capital. We are all each other have here.

Feeling relieved I spot his figure hurrying towards me from the elevators and I find his arms engulfing me in a tight hug.

"Hey," I say.

"I'm sorry if I-" I start.

"It doesn't matter. I have to-to tell you something. I have a feeling their isn't much time." Peeta explains, his eyes clouded with fear. My eyebrows furrow.

"What is it?" I ask.

"I can't explain everything to you. But I made a decision without you. I'm sorry, but it had to happen. And now... " He hands grip my upper arms.

Engaged by the panic in his voice, I stare up at him, my senses alert.

"What decision? Peeta... what did you do?" I ask fearfully.

He shakes his head.

"I don't have time to explain. But all I wanted to tell you is that it's going to be okay. Don't worry about me and just keep on doing the interviews and parties and stuff like we've always done." He tells me hastily, looking behind him as if anticipating something horrific.

"I don't understand. What do you mean?" I ask, my voice thick with worry.

The elevator dings quietly down the hall and Peeta's head whips around.

"Oh God."

"Peeta?"

He grips me harder, pulling me close to him once more.

"I'm sorry. I know you hate it, but I love you." He whispers into my ear. I am startled.

"Why would you think I-"

Hard footsteps sound behind him. I look over his shoulders, Peacekeepers march towards us.

"Peeta. Peeta what are they doing?" I ask hastily, feeling my heart beat rapidly.

He releases me, backing up and turning towards the men in white. One holds a club and the other unclamps a heavy pair of handcuffs.

"No, what are you doing to him?" I cry as they bound his hands, preparing to hit him with the club should he struggle. But he doesn't. He remains calm, handing himself over to them.

"Quiet girl. You'll wake the others." One commands, pushing Peeta's head downwards as his blonde locks drape over his face. I look around at the other doors surrounding us before quickly meeting my gaze with the Peacekeepers and Peeta.

They turn and begin to push him down to the elevator. I run to keep up with them as they march swiftly with Peeta's arms held tight by each gloved hand.

"No! No, I won't let you take him! He hasn't done anything wrong!" I protest, attempting to grab Peeta away from them, but they are strong and push me away when I try to clasp my hands around Peeta's.

"Get away. You have no business with him anymore."

"I suggest that you leave." The younger, more agile one commands as they wait for the lift.

I shake my head, incredibly confused. These are Snow's men. Snow wants Peeta and I to be together, so why are they separating us?

Peeta remains quiet as I ignore their responses, continuing to argue with them as I try to yank him away from them.

"No, I'm not leaving. Let him go!" I yell, my anger rising. I have no idea what's going on nor what they are doing, but I don't want Peeta getting arrested.

"Let go of him!" I repeat, hitting the older Peacekeeper in the arm with my fist. He turns and forces me away more harshly. I feel myself fall to the ground with a thud.

"No! Please, don't touch her. She's just-just upset." Peeta speaks up for the first time, making an excuse for me. I narrow my eyes at him, forcing myself off of the ground. His eyes become filled with pity as I stare at him. Frustration waves over me.

Peeta Mellark can give me a lot of looks, but he cannot give me that one.

"You release him now. _Now_ ," I say through gritted teeth, clenching my fists.

Sliding doors part and they step into the elevator without another word.

"No!"

The door attempts to close, but I force it open with my hands, pushing myself inside before the older Peacekeeper takes out his club and smacks it over my head, wearing an indifferent expression like he's dealt with screaming teenage girls before.

I fall back against the side of the lift as we ascend downwards, my mind spinning like a top as the scenery of city buildings flashes out the window, speeding upwards. Peeta's shouts fill the air. My left temple sears with pain as blood drips into my eyes. My vision goes black around the edges and I momentarily go out of consciousness.

My eyes soon squint open once again as I make out the velvet lobby floors and glass doors leading out into the city. Somebody grips my upper arm and drags me onto the sidewalk outside of the Hotel. Peeta yells my name and my head turns slowly in his direction. I make out his face white with fear against his electric blue eyes as they force him into a foreign car. It drives off down an alleyway where the morning sun's rays haven't hit yet.

"No..." I moan quietly.

 _Why are they doing this? Why do they separate us again? We did everything Snow said. What did we do wrong?_

My vision blurs again as two footsteps walk steadily towards me.

"Where do you want her, sir?" The person holding my arm behind me speaks in a clear voice. I think it's the younger Peacekeeper.

"With him. She's caused enough trouble as it is. I should have killed the both of them the moment they stepped off that hovercraft. But... I might as well enjoy the pleasure of... _taking car_ e of them while they're here." President Snow growls, his voice horrifyingly familiar as usual.

"Her crime then?"

"Treason. The only reason she was spared during her trial was because of Mr. Mellark. They are both criminals to the Capital now."

With a terrible yank of my hair, I am hauled into a car, my eyes rolling back into my head.

 **A/N: Just a little preview for the chapter following this one, I _will_ be finally switching over to a District Thirteen overview of what's going on over there now that this is going down in the Capital. It shouldn't be series of chapters, just one or two from someone in Thirteen's point of view every once in a while. Ultimately, Peeta and Katniss are my main focus right now. Hope you all enjoy! I should update before Thanksgiving-so stay tuned! **


	27. Chapter Twenty Seven: The Rescue Mission

**Haymitch's POV**

"The kids are just doing what they have to do to live, I assure you Madam President, they aren't traitors." I assure her for the hundredth time as we sit in the Briefing Room deep under ground in the heart of Thirteen.

Throughout these grooling months we've watched them on the screens as the Capital made my tributes a spectical once more, parading their love affair like nothing's new. I'm sure it's working in Snow's favor. The citizens must be eating up every bit of it, completely blind by Katniss and Peeta's act to see the rebellion creeping upon them from behind.

Through every condescending word that has come out of their mouths and the many hints given that the two of them are complete traitors and don't give a damn about the rebellion, I have defended them against President Coin and her commanders.

Coin cocks up an eyebrow, looking unconvinced. "Yes. It is just that every night they spend in the Capital, the more the people of Thirteen become restless. Mr. Abernathy, I've promised them a leader. Katniss Everdeen, the Mockingjay. And yet, she is sitting in the luxury of their city looking very much like a loyal citizen to Present Snow," Coin explains to me, eyeing the great screen in front of her.

It replays clips from the annual Masquerade Ball, a frivolous party in which case I've had to force myself to attend many times in the past. Vivid memories of vomiting in a raspberry punch bowl fills my mind and I force myself to look away from the elaborate scene.

"I'm all too aware of that. That's why we sent out that message. At least so they know that we are still there for them. Right now, it looks like we've abandoned them _and_ Johanna and Annie, who are no doubt in prison or worse... President Coin, you have made no effort to try and rescue these kids nor the other victors," I state, a tinge of frustration in my voice. This lady can be a piece of work sometimes. Let alone she has no clue about the instensity of the Capital or the games. Living underground for seventy five years can't help.

"You know why we can't attempt a rescue mission. The Capital's security is incredibly advanced. It would take a major power outage for us to even have a chance to send in our hovercrafts. And District Five..." she sighs, "has given us no reply since our last message sent."

I shake my head.

"I understand, but isn't it worth the risk? There's got to be a way to speed up the process. This is your leader of the _revolution_. Shouldn't she be your top priority?" I argue.

"My _people_ are my top priority, Mr. Abernathy. A leader can... be replaced," She begins, rubbing her hand against her chin.

A cold hearted laugh escapes from my lips.

"Madam President, you know that there is no one else who is capable of doing this. Katniss Everdeen is the heart of this rebellion, wether she knows it or not. She can't be replaced."

Coin opens her mouth to speak just as Plutarch Heavensbee shuffles into the room, his mouth pressed into a thin line.

I look to him.

"I know he'd agree with me." I press, nodding to the thick man with flat blonde hair spanned out onto his large head.

Coin ignores me, turning to Heavensbee.

"Yes?"

"I've just spoken with our messenger in the Capital. The code was received." He announces, placing himself beside President Coin.

She gives a small breath of relief.

"That's good news. And when shall we hear back?"

"That depends on our Mockingjay. She's suspicious that one, it will take a lot to convince her that it's us." Plutarch says with a slight sigh.

"We might need to send more signs." Coin says quietly.

Plutarch nods.

"Well... I just heard some good news from Beetee." He speaks up, shifting his position.

"And that is?" I ask, giving a stirring motion with my right hand.

"District Five answered our message through Morse code, Beetee overheard it when he was working on his programming. If they figure out how to break the dam, this could be our chance to begin the rescue mission. I know we've been patient for a good while now." Plutarch tells the two of his, a small smile on his face.

Coin's eyes light up.

"Has he contacted Five's commander for more information?"

"Not yet, but it should be soon. The Peacekeepers are infiltrated heavily throughout the District, but with a good deal of stealth I think we should be able to communicate better details."

"Alright. This is good. Very good. Let's start preparing for the mission so to be ready. It may take a number of months before everything comes into place." President Coin turns to me.

"I guess our wishes have been granting in just the right time. Your right Mr. Abernathy... we need a leader and it must be her."

I nod curtly, turning to leave the room so Heavensbee and her can discuss details. My stomach grumbles and I remember that it's lunchtime.

I bet it'll be slop again. Always slop in Thirteen. At least the kids are dining like queens and kings in the Capital, even if they _are_ in the hands of Snow. But for now they're safe, at that's all that matters.

I stride down to the cafeteria hall and get in line to load up my tray. As I suspected-it's the usual. Grumbling to myself, I sit beside that Hawthorne kid at the table close to the projector screens. He'll probably want to hear about the possible rescue mission. Since his heroic act of transporting every refugee he could from Twelve to Thirteen, he's been granted a special position with Finnick and I at the military meetings with Coin so I'm allowed to give him the notice.

With his head slightly drooping, he stirs his slop with a metal spoon, his other hand clenched on the table. I clear my throat nervously.

"Hey, they uh, they're thinking about carrying out the rescue mission to get Katniss out of Thirteen. Peeta too." I add. I've never asked straight out, but I always knew somehow this kid's connection with Katniss. He's seemed pretty distraught since coming to Thirteen with her being gone. Before I had met Katniss during the Reaping I had seen her and Gale run around together in Twelve occasionally. I knew that they'd been hunting in the woods since they were little. Best friends, maybe even more.

Hawthorne's head jerks up. His cracks a grin, but suppresses it quickly so I won't see. Too late.

"That's-that's good. When?" He asks eagerly. I shake my head.

"Not sure. Whenever Five can destroy the dam and cut power to the Capital. It will be a big operation. Who knows." I explain, trying not to get the boy's hopes up too much.

"Oh, okay..." he remains quiet for a little, taking a sip from his spoon. At one point he opens his mouth to speak again, but changes his mind and closes it, looking around the cafeteria instead. My eyes shift down to my food, and I begin to eat, too.

The silence is terribly awkward and right when I'm about to question why I sat with Hawthorne at all, Finnick approaches us, not sulking for once. By the pleasant look on his face, I can tell that he's heard the news.

"Hey," he nods to us, slamming his tray next to mine. I grunt in response.

"Did you, did you hear-"

"Yes," I say, sighing.

"Now, don't get too worked up about it Odair, because-"

"No, I know. I know... one can be hopeful though, right?" His lips break into that perfect grin of his as he shakes his head like he can't even believe it.

I shrug, shuffling a spoonful of the awful sludge into my mouth. Urgh, you need at least to pinch your nose to get it to go down. During these times I want my liquor more than ever. Water can't wash it down better than a good shot of rum. Screw Thirteen.

"Do they need soldiers?" Gale speaks up suddenly, his bowl already scrapped clean. I suck my teeth before answering.

"Uh, yes... they do."

"I'm already signed up." Finnick announces.

"No, you're not. Coin is for sure not going to let you go." I reply firmly. This isn't a free-for-all kind of a thing.

"What? Why not Haymitch? My Annie, she needs me!" Lovesick Finnick exclaims, looking at me like I'm some kind of demon for suggesting different.

I roll my eyes.

"Listen, _first_ of all, you are most definitely not well enough to go." I stare down at the rope in his hands practically causing his skin to bleed.

"And _second_ , you've been doing Thirteen's propos in place of Katniss so far and we'll need a diversion. You are representing the rebellion as of right now."

Finnick's the only Victor we've got here besides me, and also the only one who understands how to look and act in front of a camera. The understudy of the Mockingjay has to stick to his job.

Finnick's gaze hardens.

"Haymitch-"

"Look, I don't give the final orders. Talk with Coin if you are dying to. I'm just stating the facts on the situation." I say, holding up a hand. Though, at the end of the day I do have some sort of a say in the mission. They're my tributes. But I don't tell Finnick that.

Mr. Bronzehead suppresses a groan.

"I forgot water," he mumbles, shifting out of his seat. I watch him go, shaking my head.

"Haymitch..." Gale says quietly after he leaves. I turn to him.

"Hm?"

"Can I-can I go? I'll talk to Coin and train and do whatever it takes. I want to be a part of it." He asks, a hopeful look in his eyes.

 _Poor kid..._

"Uh, yeah. You probably can. But remember, it could be months before the mission takes place. I wouldn't go losing your head if I were you." I tell him sternly.

He nods.

"I understand. I'm-I'm gonna go talk to her right now." He decides, clearing his tray and running off to the west wing doors.

I rub my lips together as I watch him go. A strange sense washes over me as I am reminded of myself at that age. Young and naive... yet full of ambition and faith.

My eyebrows furrow.

"Been too long," I mumble to myself, clearing my tray hastily.

 **A/N: I personally love writing Haymitch. He's seriously the best. Hope you all liked the chapter**!


	28. Chapter Twenty Eight: Peeta Meets Annie

**Peeta's POV**

The Training Center is haunting. Memories flood my mind as the Peacekeepers drag me through the main double doors and onto the fancy swirling carpet of the lobby.

With a kick in the back, I am forced onto my stomach, sputtering as the wind is knocked out of me. Chin on the carpet, my eyes glance up at the glittering glass elevators, all too similar to the ones back at the hotel.

"Take him downstairs. President Snow wants him in cell number seven." A Peacekeeper speaks through his helmet unlike the others I met earlier this morning.

With the same yank of the arms, I am pulled to my feet. A bustling comes from behind me and the main doors part once more. Despite the Peacekeepers' tight hold on me, I jerk my head around. Katniss is shoved through the doors, staggering forward. I struggle from their harsh grasps to move towards her.

"No, she's-she's not supposed to be here!" I exclaim, panicking as my eyes meet Katniss's as I watch her knees sink to the floor. I look over her dazed figure. Dark drying blood sticks to her forehead and clumped into her left eyebrow. Her hair flows messily over her shoulders. She's still wearing pajamas-my t-shirt and her comfortable pants.

"Get him downstairs." The older Peacekeeper from before barks behind Katniss, pointing two fingers at the elevators.

"Please-please don't hurt her." I cry in desperation as the Peacekeepers push me away, the metal handcuffs digging into my wrists. I watch in horror as they drag Katniss to the right and out of sight from inside the glass elevator doors.

The lift shoots downwards, reaching the large rooms where the training sessions are held. To my surprise, everything has been transformed. The usual equipment is now replaced with columns of racks and odd instruments of metal and plastic. I am curious to look around, but suddenly a white bag is forced over my head. Blinded, I am yanked by the handcuffs away.

Through the bag I sense the bright light and the transfers to darkness as we move. My ears hear the banging of metal and quiet beeping sounds as the Peacekeepers mutter to themselves. Once I hear the tapping of a keypad and crackling voice like that over a microphone.

At last the bag is pulled off, yet I am blinded once more by florescent lighting and bright white washed walls. I crouch to the floor and the handcuffs are slid off my bruised wrists and the sound of a cell door clangs shut. My eyes open in slits as I peer about.

A rectangular room spread with simple white tile covers the floor and walls. Metal bars surround me and a tiny white cot lays at the floor of the cell. I stare down at my feet to see a small drain embedded between the white tile.

I swallow, sitting back against the cell door. My first thought if of Katniss. Whipping my head around, I look out through the bars. Identical to the others, my cell is set between long rows of others. Everything remains is quiet and empty.

 _Where is she?_ _They have to have taken her back to the hotel. She didn't do anything wrong._

I sit there for a few minutes before the noises resume again at the end of the hall. Another figure is marched along the cells, wearing a white bag over their head just like I was. I wonder if it's Katniss, I pray that it's not.

A young woman with flowing auburn hair and bright eyes is thrown into the cell in front of me. She collapses on the floor of her cell, eyeslids slightly drooping. The men who dragged her here depart quickly.

 _Not her._

I meet my gaze with her and carefully reach my hand out through the bars.

"Hey, who are you?" I ask her.

She slowly props herself up with one elbow. Her eyes open wider, her face slightly confused.

"W-why are you here?" She wonders, ignoring my question.

"Because I..." I let my hand fall.

"I committed treason." I conclude. She must have too, otherwise why would she be here? This must be where they keep prisoners now. In the Training Center. I guess it's a good way to use your resources if the games are postponed because of the rebellion.

"Why are you here?" I echo back her question, looking her over. I can tell by the fatigue and malnourishment that she's been down here for a while.

Her eyebrows furrow, as if she's trying to remember. When the silence grows I realize that she is having a difficult time.

"I... Finnick..." I catch her mumble.

 _Finnick?_

"You know Finnick? How do you... you're..." It hits me, "you're Annie." I breathe.

Her eyes glance up at her name, she comes back to reality.

"Yes," she nods.

"I'm Peeta," I respond. We'd might as well get to know each other if I'm going to be down here for who knows how long.

Annie frowns.

"No... you can't..." She whispers.

"I'm sorry?"

"You can't... you can't be down here." She says, her face contorted with fear.

"Johanna said..."

"Johanna?" I straighten. Annie knows her, too?

I don't have time to say anything more before we have another visitor. The third prisoner has come to join us. My stomach drops to the floor when the figure is shoved through my cell door and the bag is pulled away, revealing the shocked face of Katniss.

"No, no, why are you here?" I ask her, panic rising within me. The Peacekeepers rip the handcuffs off of her, chain the door, and march down the tile floors.

"No, wait, come back! She's not supposed to be here!" I yell at them. They ignore me, their footsteps fading.

I stare into Katniss's Seam gray eyes. My heart begins to pound.

"I didn't plan for you to be here. You weren't supposed to get arrested, I-I-"

"What do you mean? Peeta, what plan?" She asks in frustration, her face a mix of confusion and fear.

"It's-it's complicated... God!" I yell suddenly, slamming a fist against the bars. They ring against each other and I startle Annie across the hall, who jerks at the sound.

Katniss's eyes fill with fear, she carefully places her hand on my arm.

"Peeta, what's wrong with you? I... I don't understand why you are acting this way." She says, trying to find the right words. A difficult thing for her. I am filled with guilt realizing how little she knows right now and how confused she must be.

"I met with Snow-he wanted to talk. He, um, he-he wanted me to get you pregnant. So-so to take the next step. I refused-for you. I knew you would never want to do it. And the thought of you going through that killed me. Even if you did agree to it, I knew it would be wrong to say yes. I thought I would just be able to take the punishment-without you getting involved. But-but now we're here and..." my voice cracks, I clench my fingers into hard fists as I feel my nails dig into my skin.

Her arms finding their way around me and she pulls me close to her in silence. I find her waist and hold her close. Words aren't spoken. I know she's trying to figure out what to say. It doesn't matter if she never does. This is enough.

"It's all my fault." I tell her, a lump forming in my throat. I swallow, forcing back tears of frustration and anger.

"Shh..." She replies, holding me closer.

After our long embrace, I make us part so I can take a look at her head.

"You okay?" I ask her quietly, brushing my thumb across the dried blood. It's a concussion for sure.

She nods.

I remember Annie. Feeling slightly embarrassed, yet I don't know why, look over at her.

"Katniss, this is Annie. Finnick's, his..." I try to find the right word. Annie peers through the bars, her face in the usual confused look.

"Annie?" Katniss says, glancing from me to her.

"Why is she-"

"I don't know. She's um... she's trying to figure that out too, right?" I slightly smile at Annie, who nods.

"Peeta." She says strangely, reciting my name.

"Yes, I'm Peeta. This is Katniss." I introduce Katniss, who's eyebrow slightly raises. She recollects herself and clears her throat.

"Hi Annie." She says kindly.

Annie's lips upturn, almost forming a smile. Scooting away from the door of her cell, she leans back against the white tiled wall.

Katniss watches her curiously for a moment, but then turns to me.

"Peeta... I saw Snow." She tells me. From the look on her face I can tell that he was not happy.

"Oh," I say, my stomach knotted within me.

"We've both been sentenced for treason... I don't know what they'll do." She whispers. Her eyes stare blankly at the drain between us, eyes slowly welling up with tears.

 _Oh no, her family. Thirteen._

"Katniss..." it's not right for me to hold her, especially after what I have done. But I do.

I've ruined the chance for her family's survival, yet somehow my arms wrap around her and we end up on the small cot in the corner as Katniss's silent tears soak my shirt.

I am bewildered that she didn't push me away. She should have slapped me across the face and remain mute during the rest of our time here. Yet, her hands grip me as if I'm the only anchor holding her down to the world. I have destroyed our chance to live in safety. I have put Thirteen in jeopardy. What will happen next is surely to be the worst.


	29. Chapter Twenty Nine: The Brandings

**Katniss's POV**

Tears dry soon, just like the blood on my forehead. So does Peeta's shirt by the time I slide out of his embrace. He stares at me as I wipe my damp eyelashes with the back of my hand. My throat feels parched and I long for water. I don't bother to mention it to Peeta though. Instead, I bring up more important issues.

"What do you think they'll do with us?" I ask him quietly, leaning against the wall of the cell.

Peeta folds his arms, joining me.

"I... don't know. My best hope is that they'll let us rot here. Instead of-of doing... other things..." he replies slowly, as if not wanting to bring it up.

In other things I assume he means torture. I swallow hard on my dry throat, trying to picture it. Johanna enters my mind. They say that is what's happening to her. I wonder if she's locked up near us. Or is she already... I force the thought away.

My eyes find Annie's, she is lying on her cot now, watching us curiously. I crawl up to the bars.

"Annie, what have-what have they-" I clear my throat, deciding to rephrase the question.

"What has it been like here?" I say. Annie tentively sits up, creating a crease between her eyebrows.

"Not good." She answers, tucking back her hair. I bite my lower lip.

"Were you the only one here? You know, before we came."

Annie shakes her head slightly.

"Johanna."

 _Johanna._

"Annie, could you tell me where she is now?" I press, not sure how in touch with reality she is.

Annie is quiet for a moment, thinking.

"They took her. Gone yesterday..." her eyes follow down the hallway.

"Oh..." I glance back at Peeta. There is concern in his blue eyes.

 _Gone_.

To where? She won't know.

I have the urge to ask her more about what's happened to her here, but I am afraid it will upset her. So I give her a nod and slide back over to Peeta on the cot.

I take his hand for security. For I don't know what to do right now. A mixture of wanting to scream, cry, and laugh dwells within me. My mind is trying to focus on too many things right now.

I stare blankly at the white tile. Has Thirteen been bombed? Is my family dead? When will Snow torture me? Will he kill me? Are we going to die here? Will Peeta be tortured? Will I stop it from happening? What if I can't stop it from happening?

I clench Peeta's hand until I'm sure that I'm hurting him. He remains silent, side glancing at me every once in a while. I think to what he said to me when I entered the cell.

 _... he wanted me to get you pregnant. Even if you agreed to it, I knew it would be wrong in saying yes..._

It's true. At the end of the day I probably would have agreed to it. But Peeta knew that's not what I wanted. I never wanted to have a life like that, especially not in the certain circumstances. He believed that my free will, my _choice_ mattered more than anything else. In Peeta's eyes, he saw a way to make it work. A way that of course involved sacrificing himself for me. But that backfired. I see how it did. Snow doesn't think the way Peeta thinks. There is no escape under Snow's authority. Even when you find the tiniest crack to slip under.

Even though it didn't work, the fact that Peeta did it for _me_. The fact that he saw a way to protect me and my family as well as safeguarding my happiness. This choice of his he knew very well would result in torture or worse. It would have been much easier to say yes. I'm sure he'd be happy with the overall situation, but then again he wouldn't. Not if I wasn't happy... I look over to him. I never realized how much he loved me until now.

It isn't long before our friends the Peacekeepers enter again. They march to our cell and swing it open. Without saying a word they both yank me to my feet, my hand being snatched out of Peeta's. They handcuff me silently and push me out of the cell. Peeta, as usual, protests.

"What are you doing with her?"

"Entering her into the system." One muffled voice of the Peacekeeper to my left says.

"What does that mean?" Peeta proceeds.

They ignore him.

We advance down the hall, my socks sliding on the tile. I look over my shoulder to see Peeta's hands clenching the cell bars, knuckles white. Before we reach the metal door, the familiar bag is thrown over my head.

Stubbling, I keep up between the two gripping my arms. The bag comes off soon after and I find myself it what seems to be a shower room. The Peacekeepers throw me a stark white gown similar to hospital wear and order me to strip and clean myself, shutting the door behind themselves and locking it.

I glance around the room for cameras. Two sit obviously in each corner of the ceiling. I glare at them as I pull off Peeta's shirt and untie my pajama pants. Going under a faucet, I turn the knob. Ice cold water splashes over my face and soaks my hair. I finish up as quickly as I can, hastily pulling on the equally freezing gown that barely reaches my knees. I decide to keep the socks, daring the people behind the cameras to yell at me through some speaker to strip those as well.

The Peacekeepers re-enter and take my clothes, dumping them down a disposal near the door. We then enter another room, dim with a single chair that I am forced into. One Peacekeeper slips on latex gloves and orders me to hold out my right arm. I tentatively do and he swabs my wrist.

Pulling out a long rod from a lit container behind him, he presses a white hot brand into my skin. I shriek in agony as he pulls it away, revealing the Capital's symbol. The official seal of ownership. I blink back tears as they pull me up. Almost hearing the singing sounds of my flesh, I gag.

When I am thrown into the cell once again, Peeta has disappeared. My eyes widen as I look back at the exiting Peacekeepers. I find Annie in her usual place.

"Annie, where's Peeta? Where did they take him?"

"Oh don't worry lovebird... he's going through the same as you... should be back soon." A hoarse whisper comes from my left. Lying on her side and picking at an oozing scab from her elbow is a soaking wet, bald, pale, and terribly injured woman. Her bloodshot eyes find mine.

"Johanna..." I begin.

"Mockingjay, we meet again-oh but you don't know your _that_ yet. My bad... guess it doesn't matter if you won't be helping with the rebellion anyway." She turns into her bloody elbow to hack. Her coughing echoes down the hall.

You'd think her a completely different person if you couldn't tell who she was by her condescending voice. Nearly a skeleton, her dripping wet gown hangs off of her. Oddly shaped cuts and red burns pepper her gray skin and face, which looks that of a corpse. I resist the urge to recoil, to look away and hide my face. I have never seen a human being worse off.

"I see you've earned your... first mark," Johanna snickers, peering at my blistering wrist. My gaze flickers down to it, but I quickly look away.

"Makes sense. If we'll be under their control until who knows how long." I reply holding my chin strong so she can't tell how much it actually hurts.

Johanna smirks.

"No need to act brave. I've got one, too." She points to her same forarm. It blends incredibly well with all of her other injuries. I don't see how she lasted this long. She should have been dead a long time ago. It seems that only her amazingly strong will and fight has kept her going.

With the banging of the cell door, Peeta returns in an outfit and brand identical to mine. Johanna snickers when she catches the scene of us hugging.

"Peeta."

Peeta looks over my shoulder and sees her. He gives a curt nod, his eyebrows raised.

"Good to see you alive." With the same demeanor as mine, he looks over her gruesome appearance.

"Snow's working at getting what he needs, that's the only reason while I'm still here." she answers, her mouth forming into a thin line.

"And since Thirteen has already failed with letting you two end up here, I suppose he won't have to work at it for long..." she laughs yet again.

"How sweet you two ended up in the same cell. Guess the love story never dies in Snow's eyes."


	30. Chapter Thirty: Punishable Love

**A/N: Happy Chapter 30 everyone! Hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving (if you celebrate it), if not, hope you've had a relaxing weekend! Enjoy!**

 **Peeta's POV**

The brand aches and I assume Katniss's does as well for she keeps staring at it intensely as if her glare will make the pain go away. It's sick to think what they did to us. An ever existing mark that will stay with us for the rest of our lives. A never fading scar that will always make us remember these moments here. I clench my jaw in anger just thinking about it. I resist the temptation to rub it away with my thumb. That won't stop it from going away, it will just make it hurt like hell.

The chatter with Johanna soon dies as she eventually gets bored, turning over on her side to nap. From what I can tell, she probably needs it. Anxiety dwells deep inside of me since I saw her in her condition. We've now committed treason, just like her. Torture seems to be at the end of this road for Katniss and I now. If only I can convince Snow not to touch her. At least so I don't have to feel the guilt of my mistakes. She shouldn't have to suffer. I'd die if I witnessed it.

As what I assume to be early afternoon arrives, Katniss's stomach growls loudly. She blushes.

"Sorry."

"It's okay, I'm hungry, too." I tell her with a half smile.

 _They could starve us as well._

"Food comes around 12... two meals." Johanna's raspy voice informs us as she still lies with her back facing us.

 _Guess not._

I feel suddenly guilty after hearing her. We've been pampered with full size courses and seconds on dessert while they sit here forcing down whatever the Capital slides through the cell bars.

Johanna's words ring with truth as the Peacekeepers enter, bearing trays with cups of seasonless soup and small hunks of bread.

"Just enough to keep us alive." Johanna says before shoving the bread down her throat. Katniss and I gulp down our soups in two seconds. The bread tastes horribly dry and plain, but I eat it anyway. The Peacekeepers remain outside the cells until we finish and then open ours.

"Come with us-both of you."

Instantly thinking of our impending torture, I hold Katniss's hand tight as they chain us. Our handcuffs clink together. As usual we march away with bags covering our heads. Soon, we are thrown into a sealed off white room with glass windows aligning the front wall. A tray filled with oddly shaped objects, a white bed, and a steel chair appear through the windows in a room half this one's size.

The Peacekeepers exit and the room remains quiet for a while. Katniss and I stare at one another, waiting for something to happen. Her eyes flicker to the corner of the ceiling behind my head. She's probably spotted a camera no doubt.

"Peeta..."

"Yeah," I answer.

"I..." She can't think of the right words. I strangely can tell what she's thinking. The sense of impatience and worry radiate off of her.

"I know." I grip her fingers with mine. Her eyes stare deeply into mine and, for once, they are full of trust.

A voice crackles above us.

"Please escort Mr. Mellark to the Chamber." President Snow says in his drawling way. Katniss's eyes widen as she becomes alert.

"What? Where is he taking you?" She refers to Snow, her voice rising in panic. The Peacekeepers enter, pulling me away to the room on the other side of the glass wall.

"No, no, Peeta!" She cries as I am pushed through a door into the equally white room filled with the bed and steel chair. I see Katniss race up to the door through the window, banging and pulling on it as hard as she can, her face white with panic.

I want to yell at her that I will be fine. That everything will be okay, even if it won't be. She finally spots me through the glass and places her hands on it, staring intently at me with fear.

"Peeta!" Her mouth forms my name. All I can do is stare at her with confusion and sadness, not sure of what is to come.

President Snow's voice echoes again over a speaker. Katniss can hear him too for her gaze shoots up to the ceiling.

"As punishment for the act of treason against the Capital, Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark will both be condemned to suffer in order to satisfy the law of Panem."

 _Suffer. No, no, not her. Please not Katniss, just me._

"One mentally and the other physically. Their love will cause them this pain, which has ultimately damned them to these afflictions."

Katniss stares at me in horror, both hands pressed on the glass, her body beginning to shake with fear.

"Peeta," she whimpers once more as I almost make out her voice.

"You may begin." Snow orders.

I don't even have time to process his words before the first blow occurs, causing me to crash to the floor as the earth rings below me. I feel wet liquid flow from my right ear as I struggle to stand. I barely get to my knee before I am kicked hard in the stomach. I hardly have time to recover before one Peacekeeper hoists me up from the arms and slams me into the wall.

I stagger, falling back into the white bed. I hear the blood pound in my head as I squint at Katniss through the glass. She screams, pounding on it with her fist. Another blow occurs and I am thrown into my front. Someone kicks me in the head and my head slams into the tile floor. I let out a moan.

My vision spins as I roll lazily over. Bile rises up my throat. I swallow on it hard. My entire body radiates with pain as I get on my hands and knees. The floor seems to tilt and I feel myself wanting to collapse again.

 _No... Get up... get up for her._ My thoughts command through the agony.

So I do. My feet are placed firmly, though my knees wobble. I attempt to look the Peacekeeper who struck me in the eye, but just then his second hit occurs, knocking me back into the same wall. What follows is a blur.

 **A/N: I apologize for the short chapter-more is coming!**


	31. Chapter Thirty One: Butterflies

**A/N: Hey everyone, first note I'd just like to thank all of you who have be reading and/or following this story. I really, really appreciate the reviews and I enjoy the feedback on how you all are liking the plot, characters, etc. Anyway, thanks again!**

 **Second note and a quick note, these next few chapters will be fairly... grooling. Possibly more graphic then the last ones. So for those of you who are sensitive to these kind of things, I apologize. I feel like this cannot be glossed over in order to tell this part of the story.**

 **Now onto Chapter 31...**

 **Katniss's POV**

 _The thuds of his figure crashing to the ground over and over again consume me. The sounds, the yelling, the blood, it's all magnified on my side of the glass. Snow turns the speakers to the loudest point possible as the noises practically dig into my skull. At first I fought against them, slamming my fists at the windows and screaming for them to stop until my voice went hoarse. Soon the screaming morphed into pleading, the pleading dying into crying, and the crying fading to silence._

 _The horror has been happening for centuries. I can't remember how I got into this room or how it all started, all I can remember is witnessing the beatings._

 _I curl up on the floor, my head pointing to my stomach, ears covered with my hands. I can't tell if it's stopped. The sounds ring all around, bouncing off the walls and heading straight towards me. Entering my brain and eating me from the inside._

 _Eventually they quiet, yet I still have the sense that I can hear the whispering of Peeta's cries. Slowly I untuck my head and peer about. The Peacekeepers have left. They are done hurting him. I look about desperately for him, crawling over to the window._

 _Laying under the foot of the white bed, he slouches over with blue eyes shut tightly and the gentle rise and fall of his chest. My hands shake has I reach out to the glass, created prints with my fingers._

 _"P-Peeta... "_

 _Oh God, what have they done?_

He's breathing more steadily now as I stare down at him. We lay curled up in each other's arms, his head across my stomach so I can watch him. After what seemed like an eternity staring at Peeta beside that white bed and pushing away the thoughts that he was gone from me forever, they came in again to escort us back to the cells.

I fought against them hard and ending up getting punched in the eye for it (nothing compared to Peeta's wounds) and Peeta was dragged, passed out cold. He hasn't woken up since the torture, and I wonder if he will wake up at all.

Hot tears drip from my eyelashes and splash onto his bruised and bloody face. He gradually flutters them open. Relief rushes over me.

"Oh my God, Peeta," I tremble as more tears come.

"Hey... shhh..." He presses a hand up to my cheek.

"What... what happened to your eye?" He asks quietly. I just shake my head, more tears dripping onto his face. How can he ask that with everything that's happened to him?

He lets me sob over him, wetting his skin and the front of his white gown. His hand continues to stroke my cheek, trying to keep awake and hold me as close as he can despite the agony. It's hard for him though, his body is so weak. Frustration comes over me and I cry even more when I realize that there's nothing I can do for him. I can't help his condition in any way. I can't offer him water or heal his wounds or tuck him under warm covers. All good things I imagine him doing for me if I was in this position. Things he perhaps has already done for me in the past.

"I'm... I'm so glad it wasn't-it wasn't you," he manages, stroking my tangled hair.

"Don't. Just..." I let out another sob. Of course he's happy it wasn't me. He always puts me before himself. For once he got his way, and I had to watch it happen.

"How are you feeling?" I ask him once my tears begin to slow. Dumb question. There is no doubt he feels awful.

"I'm, I'm doing okay... better than before," He lies, trying to reassure me. I gently place a hand on his

forehead and bring it down to his cheek. He closes his eyes momentarily, relaxed at my touch.

I look around, almost forgetting that Annie and Johanna are nearby and probably gawking at us. Annie is actually fast asleep right now, her head tucked in her arms. Though Johanna slumps against her bars, eyeing us. My eyes break away from her gaze, feeling ashamed from all of my crying.

Johanna isn't judging though. She stares at us with concern, almost worry. She's probably not at all surprised by Peeta's torture. She surely has suffered the same, if not worse.

"You should check his wounds... to see how bad." She suggests hesitantly with a slight nod towards Peeta. I can tell that she feels pity for us, but isn't sure how to react because of it.

I sniff, wiping my face with the back of the hand not holding Peeta's cheek.

"Yeah..." I take her advice and help him lift up his head. He winces and lets out a long groan as I sit him up.

"Sorry." I mutter guiltily. I lean him up against the back tile wall, trying to make him as comfortable as possible, in which case there's not much I can do.

"Here, where-where does it hurt?" I ask him uncertaintly, afraid of his answers. Bruises are one thing, but broken bones...

"All over?" He replies with a slight smirk.

I scowl.

He tries to laugh, but it only results in more pain as he gasps, gripping his side.

"Shh... " I tell him. He smiles as wide as his bruised face will allow, reaching up for my face.

"Okay, um-lift up the gown-thing," I say quietly. It's terribly awkward, but not in the way you would imagine. It's odd with other people in the room. I hate being watched. Peeta holds in his breath, eyeing my reaction. He pulls up the gown.

My eyes quickly avert past his boxer shorts and up to his abdomen. Bright red lumps tinged with blue cover his right side and across his ribs. I bite my lip so to not react as I examine them. It's bad. Not horrific, but not at all good.

I shake my head, pulling the gown back down.

"What is it Doctor Everdeen? Is it fatal?" He jokes. I glare daggers at him. Why in the world is he teasing me at a time like this?

"Sorry, stupid thing to say," he apologizes sincerely.

I continue to look over his head and arms, which are both equally as colorful with injuries. One of his ears exudes of dry blood and his left eye remains half open and swollen greatly. His forearms are purple from catching his falls and his lower back has been sliced up fairly good from the sharp edges of the white bed.

"I don't know what to do about this..." I conclude finally, feeling completely helpless. If I was Prim or my mother it could be different. Though, they wouldn't have much to work with in this situation either.

Peeta focuses on me as I think to myself. His mind elsewhere.

"What?" I whisper, still feeling terribly lost and confused.

"You... your just reminding me of things... things we've been through in the past..." He eventually lays back on the cot, staring intently at the ceiling. I come up to curl beside him, wanting his strong embrace desperatly around me yet knowing right now that mine is more important for him. So I hold around his middle instead. Gentle, yet firm.

"What about the past?" I wonder.

"The games... when you found me and we went to the cave... and ended up kind of like this..." he drifts off, the pain too much for him. I feel content by his words, allowing him to sleep. The cave. I almost came to like it. A place where we could be alone and safe for a time.

I reach up to comb through his hair. He needs to heal majorly, though I doubt Snow will give him a chance to. This can't be the first and only torture... more will come. I scoot as close to Peeta as I can, balling the shirt of his gown into my fist and intertwining one leg with his.

 _I'll stop it somehow._

I don't know how I will do it, but I have to somehow convince Snow that he must take me instead. Hurt me instead of Peeta.

But... under the punishment I am already being tortured-mentally.

 _Mentally_. My thoughts play around with the word.

Watching Peeta get tortured, it messed with my head... I felt like I was going insane. His pain and the noises, it devoured me. That was my torture. Seeing him get beaten nearly to death and afterwards holding him in my arms, knowing that there was nothing I could do.

I don't understand why it affected me the way it did. Yes, I care about Peeta... but lately it's been feeling different. I feel closer to him somehow and I don't know why.

I uncomfortably shift in my position, rolling away from him and sitting up abuptly. It reminds me off that strange feeling I had when we met eyes that morning he was making breakfast for the prep team and me. It gives me the urge to lean over the boy who's sleeping beside me and kiss him the way I did in the first games. The kiss that had me wanting more.

I pull my knees to my chest. No... I can't... _love_ Peeta. Love has a huge meaning, even if it's only four letters. It means commitment. It means devotion. Things I'm not sure about. Things I don't understand the meaning of.

Pressing one cheek to my knee, I side glance at him. He loves me, I am positive of it. He, unlike me, has shown commitment _and_ devotion before even knowing how I felt. He loved me even when I didn't in return. Surely, if he could and can do these things for me, can't I for him?

I like back down beside Peeta, pondering this as the butterflies flutter around in my stomach. It's a wonderful and horrible sensation.

 _You love me. Do I love you?_


	32. Chapter Thirty Two: Always Knew

**Peeta's POV**

Barely a solid week dragged by when Katniss and I were forced out of the cell once again, no doubt for another round of torture. Her entire body begins to tremble when the Peacekeepers yank her out of her position on the cold floor, which happened to be curled up next to me. She was attempting to sleep-it's the middle of the night.

"Shh... Katniss..." I whisper as her hands shake as they shackle her then myself, her wrists banging against the cold metal. Gray orbs glance up at me, tears glistening with the terrifying fear of what is to come. I swallow, clenching my jaw. I hate seeing her feeling this much anxiety-and for me. We both know what lies down past the hallway.

We reach the same horrific identical rooms with the white bed and steel chair on one side of the sparkling clean glass, which will probably soon be splattered with my blood. Katniss's harsh breaths cut into my skull and cause me to panic. I don't want the pain and I don't want her to witness it.

They lock us in, pausing for a few moments to let the fear sink in before I'm dragged away. Even though my movement is limited with the handcuffs, I still attempt to hold Katniss close to me.

"Peeta... I have to-to tell you something," her voice practically vibrates through her trembling. I grip her forearms with my fingers to stready her, taking in her beautiful face as she confesses to me:

"I-I love you."

I blink.

"What?"

"I love you." She repeats.

"A-and... I don't want to see you go through this again." She lets out a sob, but I silence it with a kiss. My lips tasting her chapped ones mixed with the salty tears.

Somehow I knew. There was too many signs to ignore the suspicion, but my heart pushed them all away, worried that I was lying to myself.

My lips press harder to hers as I replay the words in my head.

 _I love you._

It's almost as if our mouths are meeting for the first and the last time. It's beautiful, meaningful. Full of hope and sorrow like a force field radiating around us. And when we break, I feel like the light has been sucked out of my body.

I stare deeply into her sorrowful eyes, taking in every feature of her face in a completely new way. Seeing how her olive skin clashes against the fading purple of her black eye where the Peacekeepers hit her in her struggle during the first torture. Studying every tiny fleck of green and blue consumed by the silver clouds in her eyes. My gaze following every strand of her perfectly tangled and dirty hair.

Soon we are pulled apart and my heart begins to palpitate rapidly. Forced into the terribly familar room, the Peacekeepers check in over the speakers with Snow. Probably asking what kind of torture will look the most appealing to him today. I pray for not just my sake, but for Katniss's that it is the same set of beatings like last time.

I have little hope when they rip off my gown revealing my bare chest and boxers and begin to stick plastic cold circles on my skin which are connected to purple and blue chords.

My gaze trails to Katniss's on the other side of the glass, her face not even red at the sight of my half nakedness, but stark white as she slowly sinks to the floor.

I stare down at myself, finding all the white stickers plastered over my fading bruises which are now an ugly greenish color. I've hardly healed. Someone edges behind me to chain my hands to my back, opposite of where they once were. A headset is also placed over me, with the same matching sticky circles covering my forehead.

With Peacekeepers rough hands forcing me into the metal chair and shackling my waist and legs to the back of it, the slightest ticking noise echoes from the corner of the room and the first shock induces. It surges through my body and causes my head to want to shoot towards the ceiling and I let out a bloodcurdling scream.

The electric shocks continue for over an hour until the Peacekeepers tip off the stickers and I am left to slide of the chair and collapse onto the ground, hands and feet twitching horribly. My legs feel like rubber and if I was blind I wouldn't know that I had arms because I can't feel them anymore.

My mind's first instinct is to search for Katniss, who is probably pressed against the wall in petrified horror, but my muscles refuse to move. I lay there, terrified and frozen still against the white tile.

It takes four Peacekeepers to haul me away in my miserable state. I don't see Katniss when we reach the other room and instead of turning left down the hall, we turn right. It's the opposite way of the cells.

 _Where are they taking me?_

 _Where is Katniss?_

I struggle with all of my might to come free of their grasp and escape to find her, but my arms and legs only inch slightly creating an awkward squirming motion that gets me nowhere.

We take another turn and enter another series of cells, different and bigger than the others. I am soon dropped onto a cot and locked away alone.

A weak moan escapes my lips. What's going on? Why have I been placed here? Where is Katniss?

 **A/N: Hey everyone! I'm so sorry for my temporary hiatus. My birthday and school and the holidays coming up... it's just been crazy. :) Anyway, hope to return to my once a week posting of chapters again!** **Thanks y'all!**


	33. Chapter Thirty Three: A Message

**Haymitch's POV**

 _Dammit. This isn't good._

I think as I shut off the projector screen angrily with the slim remote, throwing like a skipping rock across the long conference table.

I roll out of my seat, beginning to pace.

They haven't been on the Capital's network since the Sunday of two weeks ago. Cesar hasn't interviewed either of them, no footage captured by the paparazzi has appeared, and no parties have been thrown with the lovebirds attending since the ball.

Something's wrong.

Snow entire motive is to sell these kids to the public. That or force affliction upon them and announce the both as traitors.

But what if that's already happened-and we missed it...

It was probably because of Katniss. Peeta wouldn't be stupid enough to tempt Snow to arrest them. The girl can't control her emotions as well as he can.

 _Shit_.

District Five's plan to destroy the dams is approaching, but not nearly fast enough. We need to get them out before they're killed.

I rake my fingers through my hair, letting out an uneasy breath.

"Beetee!" I suddenly call, poking my head through the door leading to the Tech Rooms. The few men in identical gray outfits blind my vision from spotting him.

"Hey, Beetee?" I snap, my eyes flickering around.

"Hm?" He responds, emerging from the sea of computer techies. I make my way over to him, avoiding the many rolling chairs and screens on desks, slightly stumbling as I approach him.

"Any," I clear my throat, "Any progress?"

Beetee glances up from his computer, dark eyes set behind his glasses. He rolls out from the desk in his wheelchair.

"I have just received a message from Five." He states.

My stomach leaps, but I contain myself, rubbing a hand over my mouth and pressing my lips together.

"And?"

He beckons me to come closer.

"Don't tell anyone that I informed you before Coin, but they plan on bombing the dams tonight. I predict that we will have a slim window to rescue them before the Capital can turn on power again with the city generators." He murmurs to me, his gaze flickering from the keyboard to me.

I nod quickly.

"Uh huh. Okay... thanks." I hesitatantly pat his back before hastening out of the room.

I feel a glimpse of hope peek out of the darkness as I hurry down the dim hallways, up the stairs, and to the Everdeen's rooms.

I don't care if Coin should be informed first, I'm spreading the word to Katniss's family and then onto Finnick and Gale.

Soon, the volunteered soldiers will be geared up and shipped out to the Capital and kids will be finally rescued from that bloody place.

Nervous yet determined, I knock on the steel sliding door of their apartment. After a brief pause, a small girl with Katniss's nose and mouth, yet kind blue eyes and pale hair pulls open the door.

Her expression brightens slightly.

"Haymitch." She smiles.

I crouch to her level. Fourteen and she's still barely over five feet.

"Hey, can I come in? Your mother's gonna want to here this." I tell her.

With a curious look, she ushers me inside.

"Mom... Haymitch, I mean, _Mr. Abernathy_ -" she corrects herself in front of Lily-"has something to tell us." She says, eyeing her indifferent mother.

She sits stiffly on the bed on the right wearing the usual nurse outfit with her hair braided out of her face. With her blond eyebrows raised slightly and eyes glazed over she looks over at me.

"Haymitch? Why are you... is there, is there any news?" She realizes my presence, abruptly standing from the bed. Her expression suddenly transforming.

I take a step closer and nod.


	34. Chapter Thirty Four: Light and Dark

**Katniss's POV**

I wipe my familar tears from my face, curling my knees to my chest. The last session has just recently finished.

We've been separated since the shock torture. I guess Snow thought that solitary confinement would be more effective way to torture him and I.

The last two tortures we have only met eyes so I could watch Peeta suffer. Then, with echoing screams, struggle of the Peacekeepers hold on me, and one last look at his face, I am thrown back into the cell without Peeta.

I've felt insane before, especially after the first games, but this is unlike anything I've ever experienced. My head aches with noises that aren't real as my body shakes uncontrollably. My bloodshot eyes refuse to close so to sleep as I stare at the tile, afraid of the horror of my dreams. My vision often blurs, and I become convinced that figures are beside or in front of me, beckoning me towards them. Sometimes they're Peeta or Prim and sometimes they're my father or Gale.

The hallucinations became worse when food stopped delivering. I suppose Snow thinks that starving me will worsen my mental state. Johanna shared her tasteless soup with me until the guards mysteriously drag her away one day, leaving Annie and I are alone in the cold white hallway filled with empty cells.

She sits, moans, attempts to talk to me, and then sleeps. It's a daily routine, which I have come to ignore. Our conversation goes nowhere and I don't think she understands what she's saying. The confinement and malnourishment is aggravating here already fragile mental state. Sometimes I wonder what Finnick sees in her. Their love seems so... different.

It doesn't matter. She'll die anyway, just like Johanna probably already has. I will, too. Along with Peeta.

I sense the evening take place and sprawl out onto my cot, though refusing myself to sleep. My weak limbs slightly shake from the lack of nutrients and my mouth tastes strange and dry. If I am going to die in this cell, it will most likely be from starvation.

The thought is unsettling, but not in the way you would imagine it. It reminds me of something Gale and I agreed upon a long time ago. We both told each other that we'd rather die being shot in the head rather than starve to death. One is much swifter than the other.

I glance down at my stomach which has stopped growling long before now as I overcomed the worst of the hunger. A sensation of betrayal to him and my childhood wash over me. I remember the countless times I had promised Prim and mother and myself that we would never die due to the absence of bread. Food will always be provided. That's why Gale and I hunted. To provide for our families and give them that one promise-food on the table.

Above me a florescent light flickers. I move my gaze up to it. Suddenly the hallway turns pitch black. Before I can stop myself I let out a scream. Darkness penetrates the cell, blinding me from everything. I think of the first person I can call out to.

"Annie?" I say, my throat dry and voice sounding odd.

"K-Katniss..." I hear a quiet murmur.

"The lights went out." I manage, hoping my delusions aren't tricking me.

"Uh huh." She whimpers.

I swallow hard, backing up against the tile wall.

 _Why has Snow turned off the lights. Will another form of torture happen?_

I squeeze my eyes shut, waiting for something terrible to happen and hoping that it ends quickly.

But the torture never comes. Only darkness and silence. My heart pounds as I wait, completely terrified. Off in the distance, I think I hear a bang of a door swing and slam against its neighboring wall.

 _They're coming_. I think.

I place my hands over my head and curl against the floor, bracing my fate.

"Please... don't make me see him again... I can't do it... I can't..." I whisper to myself desperately as I here quiet boots marching.

 _How can they hurt him again when I just saw his body bathed with blood an hour ago?_

I hear the hallway door burst open as something strange reaches my nose and I breath in, feeling woozy. The screeching of boots hits the floor and I see tiny red dots float towards me.

Yep, my mind is gone.

My eyelids droop as I hear them unlock cell doors and two strong arms lift me from my frightened state.

"No...no..."

"Oh my God, Katniss." I hear a muffled voice from the person helping me. I stop my murmuring and lift my head towards the voice, seeing a green dim lit mask of the man holding me.

"Gale?" My voice cracks, and I pass out.

 **A/N: I apologize that these last two chapters are so short, but I published them together as a set so to start quickly working on the next one! Hope you enjoy! Also-Happy Holidays!**


	35. Chapter Thirty Five: Saving the Victors

**Author's Note: A Merry Christmas gift to all of you-here's chapter thirty five!**

 **Gale's POV**

The sight of her practically wrings my insides. Anxiety, anger, and fear well up inside of me. Picking her up like a rag doll, I cradle her seemingly weightless figure in my arms and turn to sprint down the hallway without the others.

 _Get her to the hovercraft. Get her to Thirteen._

These are my only thoughts.

Boggs stern voice comes over my intercom embedded in my helmet.

"Soldier Hawthorne await my orders-over."

I want to desperately to ignore him as I stare down at the terrifyingly beautiful face of Katniss in my arms, her face paling by the second.

"Soldier Hawthorne." He repeats in a stronger tone.

Struggling to put my feelings aside, I stop in my tracks, turning to see the others come up from behind. Boggs eyes find mine under the masks.

"Those of you with the victors in need of medical attention, ascend up to the hovercraft immediately. The rest search the entire Training Center until we find Mellark and Mason. Leave no area unchecked."

He officially commands, now giving the opportunity to run for Katniss's life.

I grit my teeth and race to the cables hanging freely from the narrow way by the elevator shaft and click myself in hastily. Holding Katniss's body as tightly as I can with her head pressed protectively to my shoulder, I inform the commander onboard to wheel us upwards. Quickly we are followed by another soldier, who is holding an equally pale young woman with flowing hair. Another victor.

Arms hoist us into the craft as I step onto the steady platform. No sooner do we step into the plane that Katniss and the other woman are practically ripped from our arms and set on one of the makeshift cots in the back. Two of the medical assistants who accompanied us on the mission place breathing masks on both of the women instantly and strap their loose limbs down. One, with fast fingers and a set face, jams an IV into Katniss's left arm.

The wind blows harshly as I curiously peer down the hole into the Training Center with chords still running down into the abyss from the hovercraft. One half of the mission is down, but the other victors are still being searched for.

The pilot commander orders the other soldier and me to sit.

"Your mission has been fulfilled, Commander Boggs will inform me when-"

Suddenly, like the rumble of a distant earthquake, the Capital's generators kick in and city bursts in light.

" _Shit_."

It messes with my night vision and I drop to my knees, forcing the mask off of my face. The tall buildings around us blind me with dozens of bright blue and yellow dots.

"Commander Boggs come in. Commander Boggs." I hear the pilot speak through the intercom, his voice rising with panic.

"I need you to get your men to the cables immediately. Get to the cables, I repeat, get to the cables."

We're gonna be dead. The radar has surely picked us up now. President Snow will send fighters as soon as we're spotted. Dammit, how could we not have enough time? Beetee said the destroyed dams would give us more time than this... or, have we been too slow?

The intercom crackles as nothing comes in. I glance from the pilot and over to the now shining abyss, wanting to scream Boggs' name down the shaft.

"C-Commander-" A voice cuts in over the intercom.

It's him.

Without thinking, I race over to the cockpit.

"Get to the cables!" I yell, forgetting the fact that I don't give orders.

"Wheeling up now-stay there-coming-" Boggs comes in and out, though his crackling words give me reassurance when I see them suddenly emerge from the gaping hole.

Boggs rips off his mask, his face perspiring as he drags a figure in a bloody white gown to the cot beside Katniss's. My stomach seems to plummet to the floor when I recognize the man. Peeta lays there practically half-dead, countless wounds covering his body.

The following soldier holding the woman seems just as bad. I don't recognize her, but her face seems familiar. Someone I've certainly seen on the projector screens. Though unlike Peeta, who was able to maintain his golden locks, her head is completely shaved. As before, the medical assistants race to attend to her.

 _What have they done to them?_

I glance over at Katniss. She doesn't look nearly as bad off as the other two. Despite from the fading bruise I can make out under her eye and the loss of color to her Seam skin, she seems to look about the same as the woman with the auburn hair on the opposite cot-malnourished.

I have the strongest urge to sit close beside Katniss and stroke her hand while whispering soothing words into her ear (even if she is unable to here them at the moment), but I stay strapped in my seat as we speed away.

She's alive. She's safe now. That's all that matters.

Boggs speaks hastily with the Commander pilot. They discuss the possible targets the Capital may have on us. The radar signal beeps as it attempts to detect other planes. I hold my breath. But there's nothing.

Nothing the entire trip.

By the time we reach Thirteen, the medical assistants rush Peeta inside, with Katniss and the other two victors close behind. Peeta must have been the first priority though because the medical assistants tended to him our entire ride, shoving odd fluids into his veins and rubbing strange paste onto the slashes across his arms and legs.

I'm not surprised. He looks like a fate worse than death. Thank God Katniss didn't appear the same way when I found her in that horrid cell.

After dropping off my gear in the weaponry, I hesitatantly make my way along the dim hallways to the hospital wings. I need to see her when she wakes.

My mind replays these past months watching the two of them onscreen. Acting lovesick and dripping with Capital jewels while living comfortably in luxury. Appearing content, happy, and naive-just like the people in the Capital.

At first it made me sick, seeing Katniss pretend again. It became harder and harder to believe that she was just acting, that everything was as fake as Effie Trinket's hair. And... every look, every touch of theirs... it affected me greatly. I couldn't ignore the fact that they seemed to be deeply in love and committing treason against the rebellion.

Yet, knowing Katniss since she was twelve helped me remember who she really is. I thought nobody despised the Capital more than me, but her hatred and fear seemed to radiate from her after the first games. She would never side with Snow. It was just another exploit in order to survive.

But all suspicions completely disappeared when I took sight of the Training Center. Those rooms... the cells... the instruments used... It was enough for me to want to abandon my mission and travel straight to Snow's Mansion and strangle him until I witnessed the light go out of his bloodshot and snake-like eyes.

Yes, Katniss and Peeta had lived in splendor for some time, but they also paid for it.

I reach the metal swinging doors leading into the lobby of the main hospital wing. Healers (or Doctors as they call here) race about in a frenzy. Nurses bustle from room to room, transporting wheeled carts filled with syringes and instruments and breathing masks while patients are whipped in beds behind curtains.

I spot Finnick toppled on a bed with the girl with the flowing hair, both sobbing loudly into each other's arms. Finnick repeats her name through the many tears.

"Annie, oh Annie!"

I turn away from the scene slightly jealous and continue my search for Katniss. Secretly, I hope our reunion will be similar. I know she's still not sure about her relationship with me, but I've known her for so long. There has to be some way I can convince her that we can be something _more_ without pushing her away (which unfortunately seems to happen so easily).

"Excuse me, but where's Katniss-Everdeen." I add hastily to a stray nurse, hopping she'll direct me quickly to her room.

"She's still bring processed into the system and the doctors are working intensively on her and the other victors... " Her bored eyes look me over and she cocks an eyebrow. Then she sighs.

"Are you a relative?" She drawls.

"Yes. Her cousin," I lie instantly.

She says nothing, but points down the right hallway.

"Thanks," I breathe, speed walking in the direction.


	36. Chapter Thirty Six: Mentor and Victor

**Haymitch's POV**

I attempt to slip into the operating room unnoticed, but a nurse with a military look about her and sharp eyes flicks her hand at me.

"Away with you. She's not ready for visitors."

I stand my ground, ignoring her comment. My eyes find Gale sitting in a chair near the bed, his jaw clenched with concern.

I meet the nurse's gaze again and set a determined face.

"Listen lady, I'm not blind. I can see _him_ right over there."

"He's a relative." She answers matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, and I'm that girl's mentor. Thanks to me she's lived through both of Snow's games. I ain't movin, so let me see her." I press.

She looks me up and down.

"... Alright but stay out of the way."

I shift around her and come up behind Gale in the chair.

"Good job kid." I mutter to him with a clap on the shoulder as I look over Katniss's state. She's not well off, but she's alive and from what I can tell- uninjured.

I just hope the boy is the same. Unlike this nurse, the medical attendants in his room absolutely wouldn't budge to allow anyone in. I only momentarily peeked through the door to see dozens of nurses rushing around his bedside.

"Um... I just did what I could." He replies quietly, not taking his gaze off of her. I crouch down beside him.

"Gale, did you by chance see Peeta?" I ask. He must have caught the sight of him when he was rescued.

He nods.

"How was he?"

Gale lets out a breath.

"From what I can tell, not good. The medical assistants tended to him the moment he entered the hovercraft." He admits, rubbing his hands together slowly, glancing from Katniss to me.

I don't know what to say about this.

 _Why him and not her? What caused him to suffer?_

My head whips back to the bed when I hear a murmur. Katniss stirs. Her eyes open in watery slits as she glances about the room, her hands gripping the sheets.

"What... what's going on... Peeta?" She whimpers.

I hastily approach her bedside, gently placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Hey Sweetheart. It's okay. Your here now with us... your in Thirteen." I assure her, deciding to leave Peeta out of the equation for now.

"Haymitch..." She begins.

"Yes. Gale's here, too." I signal for him to come over.

He carefully kneels beside her.

"Hey Catnip." He says softly, reaching up to stroke her cheek. For a moment her eyes regain peace as she feels comforted by our presences.

"Hey..." A smile nearly traces across her lips, but worry soon takes over.

"Where's Peeta? You... you must have gotten him out." She says, creating a crease between her eyebrows.

Gale swallows, choosing not to answer. I take over for him.

"He's here. We got him and the other victors out." I confirm.

She nods to show that she understands, but her face contorts in fear.

"He's hurt Haymitch. Really bad. I didn't think he'd-he'd make it." Her voice catches as a few stray tears escape her eyes.

The military nurse I spoke with before shoots at glance at us, hearing Katniss's disturbance.

"It would be best if you two go. Your aggravating her, her mental state is already not well." She snaps, frustration for us growing.

Gale starts to stand, but Katniss reaches out for him.

"No, don't go. Either of you." She glances over at me through her tears.

"I've been alone... for a long time..." her mind drifts off elsewhere as she stares blankly at the wall in front of her, probably revisiting the horrible memories while being locked away.

Holy shit.

What has Snow done to her? She's broken.

I shake my head, glancing up at the ceiling. I then rub my forehead, trying to think about how I am going to explain all of this to Coin when she declares her proposition to pose Katniss as the Mockingjay. Our only hope is that her sanity will return as soon as she becomes well again.

"Where is he?" She asks suddenly.

"I have to see him. I-I don't even know if he's alright..." She attempts to sit up, groping at her left arm to remove the IV.

"Woah, woah that's not gonna to happen. You lay there till the nurse says you're well again." I say as Gale gently lays her back down. She fights uselessly against his restraints.

"No, Haymitch I need to see him. Let me see Peeta!" She pleads.

The nurse rushes over along with a few other medical attendants.

"Katniss, sweetheart, you aren't thinking straight. I'll check on him for you, okay," I assure her, trying to remain as calm as possible as she struggles in Gale's arms. Three nurses rush over and attempt to pin her down as the doctor ushers Gale and I out the door.

"You got to go now." He tells us with a shake of his head, turning immediately back to Katniss who is now sobbing, her arms flailing against them.

Gale's eyes burn with rage.

"Be careful with her, can't you see she's terrified?" He shouts at them. I shove him out the door before he can say or do much more and slam it behind us.

He curls up his fists.

"Haymitch they don't know what they're doing. Katniss is not in her head." He gestures to the door with his hand. I nod in agreement.

"I know. We just got to trust them. They're going to do what they can." I tell him, glancing around the hospital.

"The best thing we can do for her is figure out how Peeta's doing and somehow allow them to see one another." I state. Gale's harsh expression turns almost sad at my words and he looks towards the door again.

"But... why can't..." his voice dies out. I shake my head.

"C'mon." I gesture us to go down the opposite hallway. We trot across the lobby to the doors along the right wall and I find Peeta's room.


	37. Chapter Thirty Seven: Solitude

**Katniss's POV**

 _Five days since the rescue mission..._

The nurse feeds me spoonfuls of some bland soup (similar to the kind in my cell) as I sit uselessly in my hospital bed. My head throbs and my body feels weak, but at least the illusions are gone... mostly.

Seeing Haymitch and Gale's faces the moment I awoke relieved me, but my usual relationship with Haymitch soon returned when my annoyance with him grew as he kept avoided my questions about Peeta.

They _tell_ me he's here. That he's just down the hall, but I've never been the trusting type. Though, I became more convinced when my mother and Prim visited with me and I was assured yet again that he was here and safe-just like me.

I never imagined the amount of tears that would surface upon seeing my family. I thought for sure that they were dead. I thought Thirteen had been blasted out of the ground by the Capital's bombs. But the excitement took over to see Prim as a nurse. She's grown so much since the last time we were together, it's hard to think of her as the little duck I knew before.

As the nurse forces me to drain the bowl of the tasteless broth, Haymitch enters my room. I give him the usual glare.

"Are you finally going to give me any news?" I ask.

The left end of his lip curls into a smile.

"Glad to see you acting more like yourself."

"Answer my question."

He rolls his eyes at my attitude.

"Listen. There are... complications with this whole thing. I don't think you're ready to be exposed to everything yet." He chooses his words carefully, placing himself in a chair beside the bed. I feel like I'm being talked to like a child. What does he mean I'm not ready to be exposed to everything?

What is going on that I'm not aware of?

"Haymitch... is he okay?" I ask him, my voice shaky.

He lets out a breath.

"He's alive. The doctors are stabilizing him." He says, not meeting my eyes.

"But, will he be okay?" I repeat. I can already feel my heart begin to race as I wait for the impending answer.

Haymitch ponders the question, a small smile slowly beginning to trace his lips.

"That boy survived two Hunger Games and dealt with the uncertainty of Katniss Everdeen. I think he'll be fine," he answers quietly.

Heat rushes to my face and stare down at my hands gripping the pale colored bedsheets. I never realized how much pain I must have caused Peeta up until now. The guilt threatens to consume me.

"When can I-" I clear my throat. "-When can I see him?" I look up at Haymitch again, blinking away stray tears.

"Well, as soon as this _kind lady_ lets you leave your room." Haymitch eyes the nurse next to me with a smirk. She scowls at him in return.

"Don't try and tempt me. She's barely recuperated since we admitted her."

I want to roll my eyes.

Haymitch grins.

"How about say the day after tomorrow?" He asks me more than my nurse, obviously ignoring her comment.

She begins to shake her head, but I stop her.

"Yes. I need to see him-please." I plead.

"Her sister would probably be more than happy to wheel her to his room. She won't even have to leave the bed." Haymitch presses.

The nurse at last sighs, giving a small nod. A smile spreads across Haymitch's face.

"Good then. Okay Sweetheart, I'll see you later." Haymitch pats my arm and nods to the nurse.

"Very cooperative." He winks.

" _Get_." She says through gritted teeth, pointing to the door.

A laugh almost escaped my lips as I watch him slip out.

I wait in agony the following day for my visit. Prim tries to keep me entertained. We take turns braiding each other's hair and playing the silly hand games I taught her when she was little. She also offers to sing and dance for me for fun, but it's just her presence that comforts me.

"We'd probably be more entertained if Buttercup was here. I'm sure there's lots of games we could play with him." Prim says after what looked to be a tiring dance session in the corner of the hospital room as she collapses onto my bed.

I let out a laugh. "That blasted cat would probably just cause me more problems with mental health. Just that sight of his smashed orange face annoys me." I scowl, remembering how much I hate my sister's pet.

Prim's face saddens slightly and she ducks her head.

"I'm sorry Prim," I tell her guiltily, reaching out to stroke her hair.

"It's okay, it's just... he may be gone. Lady, too." She admits in a quiet voice.

"Oh no... I'm sure-I'm sure both of them are living in the Meadow or off in the woods somewhere." I try to assure her, tucking a strain of blond hair behind her ear.

She crawls to the head of the bed to hug me.

"I've missed you so much. I was so worried... when they said you'd been captured-I-I-" She lets out a sob. I shake my head.

"No, no, don't cry little duck. Shhh... I know, I know..." I try to comfort her, but soon realize that in the end it won't matter. Prim's been exposed to things I can't keep her from anymore. She's grown out of her childlike self that I once knew.

So I let her cry in my arms and hold her as tightly as I can until dinner arrives. Prim reluctantly has to go. The nurse shoos her out, though she is gentler to her than Haymitch.

"After dinner she is getting another examination done with the doctor, but than you may see her." She tells Prim as the door shuts firmly.

I let out a sigh and slowly eat the tasteless food on my tray, knowing that I must get it down somehow with the nurse in the room. The examination is quick and completed as usual, and the doctor makes some notes on his clipboard.

My boredom soon returns when he departs and I settle myself under the covers for the night with sharp eyes of the nurse watching me. I lay my head down on the fluffed pillow as I stress over the possibility of sleeping.

My dreams have been yet more horrifying since coming to Thirteen. The nurse began to give me sleeping medication on the second night, but I stuffed the pills in my pillowcase when she's wasn't paying attention. I've known since being in rehab that the drugs never help.

So I sleep on and off. Sometimes fifteen minutes, sometimes up to two hours. Never getting a full night's rest. If I sleep too long the voices return and the stench of the blood from Peeta's tortures somehow makes its way to my nose.

Heart thumping, I glance over at the nurse. She usually leaves the room around eleven once she believes me to be out like a rock. That's when they _say_ the sleeping medicine kicks in. Of course I've learned to fake it until she leaves, then I can freely pace the room; unsure what else to do with myself. It helps some (and nobody knows I've left the bed since arriving), but I'd rather roam around the hospital wing to find Peeta tonight. Why wait until tomorrow when I'll have restrictions and only limited time to be with him?

Calming my body and shutting my eyes tight, my ears hear the nurse slip out as the clock ticks eleven. I decide to wait at least five minutes before I open my eyes and another fifteen before I unhook the IVs from my arms. The ruffle of bedsheets and quiet beeping of the machines are the only sounds echoeing around the room as my bare feet hit the cold floor.

I shrug a blanket over my shoulders and edge my way to the door. Inhaling, I grip the handle and pull. Slipping out hastily, I turn and jam my blanket through the crack to prop open the door for it locks on the outside. My eyes scan the empty hallways, checking for any stray nurses on the possible night shift. There's nobody in sight.

 _Where do I find his room number?_ Is my next question.

Information is usually provided in the lobby. Conveniently, across from me is the door to lead me there.

His face and number appears on the screens behind a large half-circle desk and I turn on my heel and follow the path leading me to room 211.

If I'm lucky enough I can get through the door and wake him. I daydream about what his reaction will be when we meet as I glide down the hallways, moving as fast as my tired body will allow. I know we've only been separated for a month, but the solitude has been agonizing.

Of course it's locked when I turn the knob. Just like mine is. I look through the curtained windows peeking into his room. Maybe if I can grab his attention he'll open it for me, but my heart seems to drop to my stomach when I my eyes find his stiff appearance.

Tubes stick out in strange directions as they web thoughout his body and stuffed down his throat. A breathing machine sits beeping in the corner as well as a rolling IV pole. Eyes shut, he lays practically dead on the bed, the mattress flattened completely so that his head faces the ceiling.

I clamp my hand over my mouth and tear my eyes from the sight. Haymitch glossed over the entire situation to me. He's not okay. Nothing about this is okay. I press my hands to the glass, taking in gulps of air. I don't want to look back at his frozen body, but somehow I do. And the screams begin to return. The sounds of bodies hitting the floor, clubs against flesh, sharp objects penetrating the skin... and blood. The awful, consuming smell of blood that causes you to gag.

Wimpering, I sink to the floor. Black spots seem to dance before my eyes. I forcefully attempt to blink them away, but it does no good. I slip into the darkness, my head leaning into the sealed door.

 **A/N: I apologize for my temporary hiatus, but I'm back! New chapters are coming soon! -avalizzie**


	38. Chapter Thirty Eight: The First Visit

**Author's Note: Hey everyone! Just wanted to give a quick thank you for your wonderful reviews! The positive vibes are appreciated! You guys are great :). Here's Chapter 38 and yes, you will know what's going on with Peeta.**

 **Haymitch's POV**

They tell me she was found absent from her room in the morning and laying in the fetal position by room 211. Blocking the door with her body. Military nurse says she tried to rouse her, but was having a difficult time. I shake my head, heading over to the girl myself.

It doesn't phase me for one second that she tried to get to him before the morning. She's wild, that one. If she doesn't have some kind of feelings for that boy, I'm insane.

Sure enough, there Katniss is pressed up against the whitewashed door and muttering to herself. Feeling slightly strange, I crouch down and attempt to coax her like she's a scared kitten.

"Hey Sweetheart, how'd you get here?" I ask quietly, searching for her wandering eyes.

"I... I was... searching for him," She answers, briefly glancing up at me. I swallow, the whites of her eyes are bloodshot.

"Well... he's right behind this door." I say, hoping maybe it will lift the trance over her to see him. She obviously couldn't get in.

She shakes her head hopelessly.

"I know... saw..." She replies, clamping both hands over her mouth and nose and curling her knees to her chest.

She saw. Through the windows. I clench one of my fists. Of course she must have been frightened by the image of Peeta unconscious on the hospital bed. He's been in a coma the moment the medical assistants worked to stabilize him on the hovercraft.

I was hesitant to let the word _coma_ to pass my lips when explaining the situation to her two days ago. I didn't want her to think that his condition was fatal

(like most patients in a coma are), but maybe make it seem as though he was just sleeping when she came to visit him. That plan has now flown out the window. She's not stupid. It's as clear as ice to see that something's wrong with the all heavy medical equipment attached to him.

He's not on the brink of death, which is a positive factor, but whether the doctors understand the reason causing the coma is far from my knowledge.

"Okay. I know... I know what it looks like," I begin, watching her face fill with uncertainty and fear.

"But he's not in as serious condition as it seems. The doctors are working with him. They are-they are hopeful that he will rouse from the coma soon." I speak slowly and carefully.

Her eyes finally meet mine and she breathes in a shaky breath.

"I know you were trying to get in there last night, but you can visit him now if you like." I offer, placing a gentle hand on her arm.

After a pause, she nods. Her knees wobble as she rises to her feet, her lips set in a thin line, determined to stand upright.

"We should get the bed." The nurse says sharply beside me, speaking for the first time now. A few other medical attendants are gathered around us as well. Some watching their own patient in front of me and others waiting to attend to Peeta through the door Katniss is blocking.

I side glance at her but say nothing, keeping an arm on Katniss as she forces her legs to stop shaking.

"Wilma, go get the-" the nurse begins to another attendant, but Katniss's voice stops her.

"I don't need it." She whispers, shooting the nurse her usual glare. I can't help but smile slightly, if there's one thing you don't give Katniss Everdeen, it's pity. She's a victor, a survivor. She's capable of doing this.

With some help unlocking the door, I usher her inside with an arm around her shoulders. The medical assistants soon follow and begin their work immediately. Emptying fluids, filling up drip bags, and changing bandages.

Katniss regains her strength fairly quickly and edges away from me, watching with her mouth partially open as they bustle around Peeta. I wonder when was the last time they saw one another. Her legs move gradually towards the bed and she soon sinks to the floor, hands tentatively resting on the side of the bed. Her eyes glued on the sight of him.

The way her hands grip his bedsheet and her eyes blink back tears I can tell she's fighting something. I'm not sure exactly what it is, but I can oddly tell that it has something to do with last night and how she ended up the way she did outside his door.

My gaze breaks from her and Peeta's stiff body to the doctor speaking fast words with two other nurses and analyzing notes from his clipboard. I wait until he is finished to walk over.

"Hey Doc, Haymitch Abernathy," I hold out a hand. The doctor gives it a firm shake.

"Dr. Crawford. Here to visit Mr. Mellark?" He asks with a hand gesturing towards Peeta.

"Well, more to escort _her_ to visit him," I shrug.

The Doctor sees Katniss kneeling beside the bed and nods.

"Katniss Everdeen. Yes, they were in the games together and tortured in the cells. She's his... what, fiancée, wife?" He chuckles nervously.

"Sorry I've not been keeping up with the Capital drama." He admits with a nonsensical shake of his head.

I give a small smile. By the looks of it, this guy seems young. Maybe only a year or two older than Finnick Odair. Yet, completely different in terms of appearance. With thick glasses and a white lab coat, he stands out as intelligent and skilled.

"Nah, it's just an act." I decide to confess to him.

"But... she cares for him. Deeply." I add.

The doctor looks from Katniss to Peeta, his lips pressed tightly.

"Well, we are working to do our best. The signs of his brain activity have been proven to grow stronger since day one. Maybe... maybe if we could test him while she's in his presence it could help. Sometimes patients in comas adjust when they are surrounded by familar people." He suggests, scribbling something on his paper and looking up to see my approval.

"I'm sure she'd be up for that. Anything to wake him up." I say.

"So... what about his other injuries?" I ask almost hesitatantly. From an outsider's perspective, Peeta looks terrible from all angles.

"Injuries are healing swiftly. Thankfully that is not our major problem." He replies distantly as his eyebrows furrow. Another nurse is ushering him over to Peeta's bedside. Our conversation quickly ends as he returns to his work.

My eyes find Katniss again, stoking Peeta's cheek absentmindedly as she attempts to eavesdrop on the doctor and his nurses. I make my way over to her and place a hand on her shoulder.

"Hey, the doctor says you can visit Peeta often. He says it could help with his condition." I tell her quietly as she tears her focus away from the doctor and up to me.

She nods.

"Okay. That would... that sounds good." She replies, her gaze going back to Peeta's still face.

"Do you think," she hesitates, "do you think they'll let me stay with him. In here? I just-don't want him to be alone." She speeds the last part, self consciously feeling the need to explain. I press my lips together.

"Well, I can't make any promises. But... I'll ask." I at last conclude. For her sake, I hope it's a yes.


	39. Chapter Thirty Nine: I’m Sorry

**Author's Note: So sorry for this quick note, obviously you want to get to the story, but I just wanted to make a quick announcement. Yes, I did change my username, but I assure you that it is still me (avalizzie). Honestly, I just changed it because the other one sounded boring to me. :) Not really a valid reason, but whatever-on with the chapter!**

 **Katniss's POV**

I'm utterly shocked when the answer is a yes. My bed is wheeled into his room that night and I am placed right beside him. My nurse as well as some of his stay until the usual time and then leave quietly, shutting the door behind them. Though he's not awake, this is the closest I've ever felt to being somewhat at peace again.

We're at last together. And alone.

The space between us is just close enough that I can reach out and hold his hand from the bed. Unlike what I had expected, his skin is warm. My fingers graze over the smoothness of the top of his hand and rub over the callouses underneath on his palm. So badly do I want him to return the gesture. To squeeze my hand right back and allow me to feel the nerves of his connecting to mine.

"Hey..." I begin quietly.

"I miss you. Please don't-don't ignore me... I know you think that no one needs you, but I do."

"I've told you that before, but I don't think you listened. Or if you did hear, I don't think you believed me. But, what I'm saying is true." I insist, studying his blond eyelashes and begging that he'll open them so I can see into his blue eyes again.

I decide then to be quiet for a while and study the rest of his face. It would be easier to fall asleep if his arms were around me, but I know everything will be better now that I'm at least with him.

I suddenly frown, wondering if while he's lying there he's having nightmares of his own. Terrible dreams that he can't escape from.

"Peeta, I'm here. I'm not leaving," I confirm, gripping his hand tighter. I know often I comforted him as well as he did me...

 **Peeta's POV**

"Katniss! Katniss I hear you! I'm right here. I would never ignore you." I scream at her, but the penetrating force blocks me from reaching to her. It's this terrible weakness that locks me in like chains. No matter how much I want to open my eyes, or speak, or even _move_ , it won't allow.

The soothing sound of her voice comes and goes. Sometimes she chooses to speak and sometimes she goes quiet. I know she's still with me because I can feel her hand clasped around mine. The darkness is frightening, but her presence keeps the fear at bay. I know I'm not alone.

For what seemed like days I've been handled by the hands of foreign people and spoken to by strange and unfamiliar voices. Katniss's words are the only sounds that I've recognized immediately.

But sometimes I can't connect with my senses at all. Somehow my mind loses grasp and I slip into a deep pool of dreams, unable to reach back to reality.

The dreams are strange. Especially when they're about Twelve. Because I know it doesn't exist anymore. Yet, the dreams are somehow also beautiful. Bathed in mist like the smoke billowing from the aftermath of the bombs. A baker's sign laying in the dust. Daises growing in bunches around the ruins of the Justice Building. A stray dog roaming the empty streets. The meadow's fields swaying in the wind. An arrow flying through a forest. Quiet whispers from the mines. An isolated Victor's Village.

This is what my mind replays. It is calm, not violent. Yet through the peace it's strange, almost creepy. Like looking through the windows of an abandoned house. Memories stir in the quiet, showing you a glimpse of how things were in the past.

Katniss's voice breaks through again from my clouded force surrounding me. I hear her speak more clearly than ever before.

"Remember what I told you in the cells?" She whispers, as if almost thinking I had forgotten. I attempt to nod my head, but of course nothing happens.

 _I do. And at that moment everything in my life seemed more beautiful than it had ever been._

 _You said you loved me._

"It took me a long time to say it to you, but... I'm- I'm glad you waited for me."

"I'm so sorry for hurting you as long as I did. Please... come back to me so I can tell you in person, when you're actually listening." Her voice nearly cracks and my heart seems to crumble inside of my chest.

 _But I am listening. It's okay, I forgive you. You could hurt me over a thousand times and it wouldn't matter..._

 **Katniss's POV**

Somehow my body rests and when I awaken, my hand is still clutching his. I check over his face for the hundredth time to see any signs of a response. Peeta's face remains blank. Before any of the medical assistants enter the room, I lean over to place a quick kiss on his lips.

The doorknob turns and my nurse slides inside to escort me back to my room. The bed unlocks with the pedal pressed down by her foot and I am gently wheeled away, my hand grasping Peeta's until the last possible moment.

"Don't worry, Dr. Crawford informed me that you can visit him this afternoon." She tried to assure me, but I can tell she'd rather have me back in my designated space so she can hover over me again. Seems like it's what she does best.

When my bed and I are placed in the corner of the room, Gale is surprisingly waiting for me, a small smile played upon his lips.

"Hey," He says, pulling up a chair.

"Hey," I smile a bit too, happy to talk with someone who isn't constantly pitying me. Gale still can somehow be around me in my strange state and act like things are completely normal.

"Where were you early this morning?" He asks pleasantly, propping his elbows up on his knees.

"Oh, just with..." I hesitate.

"Just visiting Peeta." I decide to word.

Gale's face slightly falls, but he attempts to hide it.

"Oh. I, um, I heard he's pretty bad off. Do the doctors know what to do?" He asks, pretending to sound concerned.

"Yeah, he's not... great." I take in a deep breath, trying to keep back the tears.

"But I think so. They say it has something to do with his brainwaves. Whatever that means," I add quietly, staring down at my bedsheets.

Gale nods, clearing his throat.

"Well... um..." The silence drifts on. For once he doesn't know what to say to me. I brush it off.

"You don't have to try and make it better. It's fine."

He nods again, smoothing out his pants with the palms of his hands.

"Okay. Well anyway, I've been meaning to tell you that... I've missed you. While you were away," His Seam eyes stare into my identical ones.

I swallow.

"Yes," I whisper.

"And..." He pauses, reaching out to grab my hand.

"I just-ever since you left for the second games I felt like our friendship was breaking. And, and don't know why exactly. But I want that to change," He admits quietly.

I break my gaze, looking down again. It's true. Things have been different between us.

"I want things to go back to the way they were, but it's especially hard when I see you... on the screens. You know, and then off with-him-"

"Gale," I say in a warning tone. I know where he's going with this and it scares me.

"Katniss... you told me you don't have feelings. But at the end of the day how can I believe you? I _see_ the way you look at him..."

I shake my head, my hands beginning to tremble.

"No... please don't talk to me about this now. Not here. I can't Gale, I can't-"

His strong hands cup my cheeks.

"Shh... just listen Catnip. You never let me speak about how I feel."

"That's not true... I know how you feel, but I said I can't. I already told you that I'm not ready for this. For us." I try to explain, my love for Peeta clawing at the back of my mind. There's no way I'm exposing it to Gale.

"You _could_ be though. I could help you-we can do it together-" Before I can stop it all, his lips press against mine. They are comforting, warm and soft. But I know it's wrong. It's all wrong.

Yet, somehow I'm too weak to push him away. So I just cry. Tears roll down my cheeks and enter into my mouth and his. Gale soon realizes this and breaks away, his eyes finding mine. They are full of confusion and sadness.

"What's wrong?" His thumb comes up to wipe a tear away, but I hastily brush it from my cheek.

"Just go. Please." I practically beg, recoiling from his arms still wrapped tightly around me.

I watch as he slowly gets up, eyebrows furrowed tightly together. He soon leaves the room, my eyes following his out the door. It swings, half-open. I let out a horrible sob, wrapping my arms around my middle.

 **A/N: I honestly don't have a ton of ideas for Peeta's awakening scene, so if anyone has anything they think would be cool please tell me in the comments! I'm open to options!**


	40. Chapter Forty: Tears and Tasteless Soup

**Haymitch's POV**

I find Katniss absent from Peeta's room early in the morning in which I am sort of surprised, but then not at all when I remember the controlling nature of military nurse. That lady could perfectly conduct an entire Spartan army into battle without thinking twice. Which is why I love getting on her nerves. I don't respond to her like an army would.

As I stride down the hallway, I see Gale rush out of Katniss's room, a flustered look on his face.

"Hey Hawthorne," I stop to acknowledge him.

He gives me a hast nod, quickly walking down the opposite hall-away from me. My eyebrows furrow and I shrug, entering the room.

Confusion hits when I find Katniss hunched over on the bed, tears streaming down her face. Her gaze meets mine. Somehow she manages to glare at me through her wet and puffy eyes.

"What?" She snaps, wiping her face fiercely. Instantly I feel awkward, I forget that although I am attempting to help her through her mental instability (which I keep telling myself is only to insure that she becomes the Mockingjay as Coin has ordered) I am not familiar to the emotional and vulnerable side of Katniss that I see before me.

I've never been good at comforting others, and I'm not about to start now. So I just stare at her, my hands shoved in my pockets.

"Just gonna see how you are holding up," I say, moving over to the chair.

"Okay..." She begins, attempting to hide her upset feelings, yet failing horribly.

"Should I talk to Hawthorne?" I try, placing myself in the seat. I put two and two together when I saw him rush out.

She predictably rolls her eyes.

"Since when did you become so _fatherly_ towards me?"

I force a laugh at her answer.

"Sure. Call it that."

 _Is that what she thinks?_

She glares at me, her eyes squinting as she tries to figure me out.

"You've never liked me. At least not as much as you've like Peeta. You only ever have helped me because I'm supposed to be some asset in the rebellion," she spits. It's true. I did briefly mention to her Thirteen's desire for her to become the Mockingjay. Though I didn't push the idea on her yet because of Peeta.

I shrug, trying to compose myself. Did I come off as actually caring towards her during her time in the hospital right now?

"I'm not denying that." I decide to reply.

"So why are you offering to help me with my _emotional issues_?" She asks, clenching her jaw.

"Because the quicker you get out of here and into Coin's war room, the better." I say, hoping that's what she wants to hear. Maybe I should have backed off long ago. As I knew since the moment she walked on that train during the first games, her and I wouldn't get along with one another.

A hint of anger and disappointment floods her eyes.

"I'm not doing anything until Peeta wakes up."

I nod.

"Sweetheart believe me, I know." I roll my eyes.

She shakes her head in disgust.

"I can't talk to you right now. Just go like he did." By _he_ I assume she means Gale. I get up and walk out, without looking back. The door shuts with a rough thud.

She's right. I don't like her. Peeta's always been a better person. She doesn't deserve him...

By lunch I find Hawthorne in the dining hall, sitting in a different spot in the corner. Maybe he thought seating arrangements changed when Finnick brought Annie to our usual table. It seems awkward to go over there when Annie is practically sitting on Finnick's lap, so I join Gale.

I slam my tray down across from his, slouching down in my seat. Picking up my plastic cup I take a gulp, studying Hawthorne's solemn face as I taste the mineral water. So less blissful than brandy.

"May I ask why you're so glum?" I ask with a slight smirk, though I am pretty aware of the situation.

He shakes his head.

"It's all good," he shrugs, slurping up his soup. I stare down at mine. There's half peeled patatos, tiny peas, and some kind of mangled meat. I grip my spoon and force some down my throat.

"You uh, going to Coin's meeting tonight?" I ask, trying to make small talk. He glances up.

"Uh, yeah, I always go..."

I nod.

"Yeah. Right." Without the previous problem of trying to get the tributes out of the Capital between us, it's awkward to talk with this kid now. I forget before Thirteen, I only knew him as Katniss's friend. His presence really didn't stand out to me until the whipping, and that seems like it happened years ago.

"How do you think she is?" He asks me all of the sudden, breaking me from my trance. I blink.

"Oh, uh... she's doing alright. Katniss, you mean?" I reply uncomfortably.

"Yeah. It's just... she um, seemed upset today," he states, swallowing his last bit of soup.

"Well boy, she's going through a lot. The Capital wasn't merciful." I stand, clearing my tray.

"To either of them," I call matter-of-factly over my shoulder as I advance away from the table.

"What's he thinks wrong with her?" I grumble to myself.

The next few days there seems to be no change in Peeta's vegetative state. After Katniss's emotional breakdown and our argument I decided to let her be for a while, checking in with just Peeta every once in a while to see how he was doing. The doctor has stated that the best brain activity seems to occur when Katniss is by his side. No surprise to me. His blind devotion for her has never failed.

To my utter surprise it seems that she is finally returning this to him. There is not one day, not even one _morning_ and _evening_ that I do not see her with him. Whether it has something to do with her mental state or actual feelings, I'm not sure. I know she's gone crazy, it's clear to see... but, this is definitely something more.

 **A/N: Sorry for my little break between the chapters, I've been busy with school. / Anyway, be ready because I have a BIG chapter in the making! Thanks again for the wonderful suggestions for Peeta's awakening moment! I am kind of molding them all together into one big climax which I hope you all will love. Thanks everyone!**


	41. Chapter Forty One: You’re Here

**Katniss's POV**

It's around noon when I force myself into Peeta's room again. My treatment has been steadily improving since the first few days in Thirteen and luckily I've been able to abandon the bed when coming to visit him this time.

The door clicks open and the sound of my footsteps momentarily disturb the eerie silence of his hospital room as I step inside. I find him in his familiar position. Arms placed stiffly on either side of him and the covers drawn up to his chest, half a smile tracing across his lips.

It could be just my mind playing tricks, like back in the cells, but I don't think the smile was there before. I wonder if he's dreaming about something peaceful as I place myself beside him.

I take his warm hand and cover it with my clammy and cold ones, kissing his dry skin gently with my equally torrid lips.

"Peeta..." I begin, reaching up to stroke his blond hair across his forehead. I jerk suddenly when his eyes snap open, revealing his icy blue orbs. They dart around the room, then land on me.

My jaw drops as shock, excitement, and pure love well up inside of me. I shake my head in disbelief.

"Oh my-" I am cut off my his sharp inhales, his eyes beginning to bulge. His grasps my hand tight until I can feel his fingernails dig into my skin. Confusion quickly takes over as I watch his face turn purple.

"Peeta. Peeta, what's wrong?" I practically scream.

Terrible gurgling gasps come from deep in his throat.

"You can't breathe..." I whisper.

"You can't breathe!" I repeat in a yell, grabbing at anything I can find around the room to help. My fingers grop at a oxygen mask hooked on his IV pool and I shove it onto his face, the elastic making a slap sound against the back of his head.

My brain instantly goes back to the last time this happen in the 75th games followed by Finnick's hast reaction to it. Remembering the CPR positions, I climb over him and straddle the bed, beginning to push down hard on his spasming chest with both palms.

Medical assistants rush into the room as I start the first pushes; including Doctor Crawford, who rips me off of the bed and slams me on the ground in the corner as soon as he sees me.

Adrenaline rushes through me and sprint over to the bed swarming with nurses yelling to one another different medical orders.

"What are you doing? What's wrong with him?" I scream at them, prying my hands at their shoulders, trying to get a better view. I push and pull until a voice yells over the chaos.

"Take her out of here!"

Before I know what's happening another pair of arms drags me to the door and forces me outside.

"Sorry miss," A low voice mutters before slamming it shut behind me.

I whip around and pound my fists on the wood, tears and horrible cries of anguish threatening to choke me.

"PEETA!" I yell, my voice attracting everyone in the hallways.

"LET ME IN!" I repeat over and over until my throat feels like sandpaper. My nurse somehow finds me through this struggle and slams a sharp needle into my back. I give a yelp and turn on her.

"Shhhh. Calm down," she tells me, guiding me as I sink to the floor. My palpating heart soon slows down and the urge to scream and screech at every nurse in that room passes. Other medical attendants rush to my side, attempting to calm me down farther.

I feel weak and incredibly drunk as I just shake my head at them and limply push their comforting hands away, curling myself up against the wall. Fat and hot tears continue to roll down my cheeks as I sit there. My eyelids shut for a few moments and when they open again Gale is beside me, a hand reaching out to rub my back.

Delirious and exhausted I rest my forehead on his chest, gripping his gray jumpsuit with my trembling fingers. His arms wrap around me tightly as if I'll crumble into a billion pieces if he lets go.

His embrace is soothing. Different. Not like Peeta's. Strange. Comfortable and yet at the same time not. I don't know how to feel about the situation, but I also realize that I don't care. I just need _someone_.

His hands stroke my wet face as he whispers comforting things into my ear. Not "it's going to be okay" or "don't worry, he'll be alright," but distant words. Memories from District Twelve. Quiet moments in the woods that we both remember. With lush trees and slight breezes, footprints of rabbit paws and the smell of pines. The memories soon engulf me and I fall asleep against him.

The bed in my hospital room is beneath me when I awake. The room is dim and empty, other than my nurse sitting in a chair nearby-her gaze reading a clipboard filled with notes amidst the little light flooding from the crack under the door.

Her eyes find mine. For once in the whole time she's watched over me her eyes light up. She rises up and runs over to me, her hands finding mine.

"How are you feeling?" She asks, general worry in her voice.

"Fine," I mutter, using my elbows to prop myself up, hair getting in my face. I shake the strains away, thinking back to my last moment awake. Every kind of feeling surges through me.

"Is he alright?! What happened to him?" I ask her frantically, shooting up to a sitting position as my head throbs. I ignore it.

She gives me a small smile.

"He's been asking for you." The words hit me like a bullet. I blink, trying to process it all. The message sinks in and I take in a shaky breath. He's alive. He's awake.

"I can wheel you over-"

"No. No, I need to..." Not caring that she's in my presence, I rip the IV's from my arm and jump out of the bed, turning the doorknob and taking off down the hall. She doesn't stop me by following.

Bare feet slap against the tile as I run. A different, better adrenaline runs through me now as I reach his room. It gives me the strength to ignore my pounding head and weakening knees and everything else that's blocking my happiness for seeing him as I reach out to rip open the door.

Something stops me though. I am somehow able to recollect myself through the excitement and rap my knuckles politely against the wood. Maybe it's the sudden worry of it all? That he'll actually be alert and seeing my face, hearing me speak.

The knob turns almost instantly and I am greeted by Doctor Crawford, a pleasant yet tired look on his face.

"Miss Everdeen. Glad you could come to visit. Someone's been expecting you for over an hour."

 _Over an hour? How could I not have woken up sooner?_ I scold myself quickly before following him inside, blood rushing in my ears as my heart begins to beat fast.

Laying back against thick pillows with hands resting calmly against the mattress, an anxious expression played across his face is him. Eyes searching for mine and lips pressed tightly together as stray pieces of golden hair brush his forehead, he slowly smiles.

The emotions build up inside of me and cause my whole body to shake. I clutch my stomach as small whimpers escape my parted lips.

"Katniss," his voice carries across the room softly to me. I stumble over to his bed, his arms reaching out to snatch me up before I even reach him with mine.

The moment seems to freeze as we hold each other. My face pressed tightly to his shoulder as he grips my back as tightly has he can, although I can feel the weakeness and exhaustion radiate from him. But he's here. Alive. With me. And I thought I had lost him forever...

"P-Peeta... Peeta..." I try to collect my thoughts, think of something to say to him. Find the _words_ , but his name is all that comes out of my mouth.

"Hey... I'm here. It's okay," he assures me in his usual smooth and soothing voice, his hands running over every inch of my arms. I curl up next to him and rest my forehead against his, forgetting the doctor and whoever else is in the room at the moment.

Our breathing patterns soon match one another's and I begin to feel sleepy again while feeling so safe and comfortable in his arms, but manage to stay awake in order to just see his face and hear him speak to me. All I can seem to do is nod as he repeats my name and gives me more reassuring words, gradually lifting the heavy and black veil that seemed to be hanging over me since the day we were separated.

 **A/N: More drama to come in the next chapter, so stay tuned! ;) Thanks everyone!**


	42. Chapter Forty Two: Imperfect Happiness

**Peeta's POV**

Every moment she's with me the pain seems to subdue, turning into a beautiful feeling of comfort and bliss as we hold onto one another. I feel so relieved to be awake at last after the strange series of dreams, safe in Thirteen, and with Katniss again.

All she is able to do is say my name, stroke my face, and listen intently as I confess to her my horrible moments while in the coma, but telling her that I could feel her presence and hear her voice speak when she was near me every moment.

This seems to make her feel content that she somehow helped me during my time asleep. She snuggles up to me as my arm tightly wraps around her shoulders. Annoyance instantly overtakes me when I see my doctor still standing in the corner, obviously not getting the signal that I want her and I to be alone. Can we never not be stocked by people or cameras or listening devices for once?

He knows that I'm still incredibly weak since my struggling to come back to reality. Everything aches with pain at the moment, including my arm wrapped around Katniss, but I don't mind. The happiness overcomes it.

I know that she was the one who gave me the ultimate strength to pull myself out of the coma. When I heard her voice say my name out of the murky darkness surrounding me; her voice filled with so much pain and pleading for me to hear her, I forced myself to get back. To come back for her with every centimeter of strength within me.

"How was everything... while I was away?" I ask her with a saddening look in my expression, forcing her to speak to me since our reunion. I mean how was _she_ while in Thirteen and even before that. I never got to comfort her while she watched my blood be spilled in that white room with the glass windows. Her screams of horror was added to my thoughts and nightmares every day that we were apart.

Her beautiful gray eyes find mine. They are tired, melancholic even, yet filled with ease.

She swallows, deciding whether or not to lie to me. I can see it in the way she bites her lip, her gaze fluttering about the room.

"It was hard," She at last manages, giving me as much truth as she will allow. I nod, creating stroking circles on her arm with my thumb.

"I've missed you so much," I lean close and tell her in a whisper, so only she can hear.

"Me too," he voice shakes, threatening tears. I bring her face into my embrace, muffling her quiet sobs and creating a tangle of tubes and IVs between us.

"Can you leave please? Just for a little bit?" I finally ask the doctor. I don't have to be watched for just a few moments.

The young man's face slightly reddens. He gives me a quick nod, and shuffles out the door.

I guess that was easy enough.

"I'll need to come back in twenty minutes," he quietly tells me before shutting the door. I bring Katniss's chin up from my chest so she can see my gaze as I wipe away her trickling tears, her body trembling at my touch as if she has been aching for it since the beginning of time.

Our lips meet as the electricity surges, quiet and beautiful as our mouths move in unison. I can feel her heart beat hard against mine as she gently pushes herself closer to me. Her leg begins to wrap over me as she attempts to shift on top of me. I give a low groan in pain.

"Ow..." I wince as she sits back abruptly.

"Sorry... are you okay?" She asks, looking guilty for hurting me. I shake my head, angry for making noises about my ribs when I wanted to continue this with her.

"No, no. I'm fine. Let's..." I tuck a strain of her hair behind her ear and push my lips against hers, but we are interrupted by the swinging sound of the door opening. Katniss jerks away from me, losing her balance and nearly falling off of the bed before I grip her arm and pull her back up. A chuckle escapes me before I end up wincing again, clutching my piercing side.

Instead of the doctor invading the room, it's Haymitch.

"You're up," he exclaims as if I had just woken up from a nap, parking himself in a chair beside us.

"Yeah," I reply, gently trying to scoot myself over so Katniss won't have to listen to our conversation with the awkwardness of her left leg hanging off of the bed and her hand gripping my hospital gown in a fist to support herself.

"Glad you made it," he smiles, giving my shoulder a heavy pat. I return his smile, forcing myself to sit up a little taller without causing myself more pain.

"It's good to see you Haymitch," I say quietly.

He nods.

"Well... Coin will uh-be wantin' you first thing tomorrow." He glances over me at Katniss.

 _Coin? The leader of the rebellion?_

"It couldn't be put off any later, she's been anxious to see you since you both were rescued. I was able to hold it off for a while till he woke up," Haymitch explains with a small sigh, reaching up to rub the back of his neck.

"Okay," Katniss mumbles with a small nod.

"Good. Well... I'll let you two be. Alone." He grins, shifting out of his seat. To my surprise and humiliation, he winks at the both of us. Katniss's face flames bright red as he leaves.

I pull her out of her embarrassment as my mind goes back to Haymitch's words about Coin.

"Why does President Coin want to see you?" I ask her curiously, pulling an arm around her.

Her eyes glance up to mine.

"To discuss me becoming the Mockingjay." She admits.

I raise my eyebrows.

 _The Mockingjay._

 _Coin is not the leader of the rebellion_. I think to myself.

 _Katniss is. Or soon will be._


	43. Chapter Forty Three: Snow’s Plan

**Katniss's POV**

I straighten out my plain gray jumpsuit, surveying myself in the bathroom mirror. I moved in with my mother and Prim a week ago after I was released from the hospital. Things finally feel a bit normal between the three of us now that we are together under the same roof again. But it is also strange, too because I'm without Peeta. Again.

Now I have to go through extra amounts to see him in the hospital. Not that I mind seeing him, I anticipate my visits practically the day after the last one, but it is harder than before due to my limitations at the hospital wing. I wish I could sneak down every night to fall asleep beside him. I feel like I'm physically being torn in two everytime I think of him alone in an isolated hospital bed floors below, without me.

I bite the inside of my cheek as I anxiously pull a thick strand of dark hair over my shoulder. It's frightening looking at yourself in a mirror after so long. My appearance is terribly unfamiliar. It's obvious that I've lost weight, my cheeks are sunken in and my skin has obtained a sickly pale color. My lips and cheeks flush with redness, as if I have some sort of sickness, and my eyes appear ghostly. The irises a clear color today rather than the usual gray. Not to mention the slight dark circles beneath them.

I haven't slept since my release. The dreams are too much to bear. Far more horrifying and violent than ever before, I cannot close my eyes for one second. I know he's safe. I know Peeta's in Thirteen with me, but it still doesn't change his bloodcurdling screams that fill my ears and the smell of fresh blood mixed with the stench of Snow's white roses which fills my nostrils if I dare breathe in.

I clear my throat, forcing my eyes away from the creature in the mirror and to the door standing ajar. I stride through the apartment, kiss Prim's forehead as she lays asleep on one of the beds, and leave the room.

It's around nine o'clock when I reach President Coin's conference room. I quietly approach the double doors. Gale leans against the wall outside, as if waiting for me before he goes in. I force my gaze downwards, not daring to look at him. My feelings towards him since our kiss have been swirling like a hurricane inside of me. It's all too much to comprehend right now. All I know is that I can't think about him or the memory of his lips on mine.

"Glad you could make it," he tells me sincerely, a small smile across his lips.

I nod as he turns one of the knobs, opening the right door for me. I avert my eyes away and enter.

I find a long rectangle table filling up the center of the room surrounded by comfortable wheeled chairs. A bright screen appears to the right of me and a few windows overlooking the main spiraling stairwell on the left.

A lady with a thin face, lined forehead, and a sheet of silvery gray hair sits in the nearest chair. She's followed by Haymitch, a dark man with a stern face, Plutarch Heavensbee, Beetee Latier, and Finnick Odair. Relief floods me in seeing two more familar faces who understand at least a glimpse of what I've gone through. My lips break into a small grin.

"Katniss," Finnick exclaims, standing up to greet me. To my surprise he strides over and gives me a good hug. I am a bit shocked at first, but return the gesture.

I had doubts about him before and during the Quarter Quell, but since we've survived one games together and he's part of the revolution now I guess it's safe to consider him as a permanent ally. In other words, a friend? I give a nod to Beetee, secretly wondering if he'll come over to hug me, too. He smiles and wheels out his chair, but I soon realize that it's not one of the chairs from the conference room. It's a wheelchair.

"Hello Katniss." He says in his usual calm and calculated voice.

"Beetee... I..."

"The electricity from the arena paralyzed my legs, if that's what you are trying to ask," he explains.

"Oh." I lower myself in the nearest seat, finding the silvery gray haired woman staring at me intently.

"Miss Everdeen. I'm President Alma Coin, leader of the rebellion." She holds out a hand to me, her crystal colored eyes frozen on mine. I shake it, pressing my lips together. This lady is the one who wants to put me on display for Thirteen. To call me The Mockingjay. I swallow.

"We are so glad you could make it to one of the meetings today. I understand you were in the hospital for quite some time. I can't even _imagine_ what you must have gone through while in the Capital. Of course, you had to do what you could in order to stay alive." She says, her face trying to contort some sign of sympathy towards me.

I nod.

"So... why do you want me here?" I ask quietly, directing the question really towards Haymitch. He nods over to Coin, who speaks:

"We wanted you here so to explain the first orders you will have as the Mockingjay..."

The meeting is short and precise, and I realize that my so called "orders" as the Mockingjay are really just two filmed clips of me standing in front of fake rubble and holding up a giant flag. Plutarch calls them "propos." Videos to heighten the Districts thurst for rebellion.

A small sigh escapes me as I shut the double doors I once walked into less than an hour ago. They quickly reopen again as Haymitch slips outside. He side glances at me, taking in a breath and deciding to speak.

"I know it's not much right now, but it won't be just standing in front of a green screen and reciting lines forever. You'll get out to the front lines eventually," He says.

"Eventually." I repeat. I shake my head slightly.

"So other than creating rebellion activist videos, what else does she want me to do here?" I ask, a hint of annoyance in my voice.

I have a feeling that what I'm going to do isn't going to help anyone. I haven't an inch of leadership qualities in me. I can't act like a hero nor say anything inspiring.

"Look, I know it's not some fancy Capital party being here, but just act confident and strong in front of the cameras. Just seeing you alive gives them hope that this might work. You could also start paying attention to your schedule," He points at my inky arm.

I stare down at the purple smears. I've naturally just ignored the words on my arm since the first day out of the hospital. Guess I thought it was just some suggestion so you aren't bored around here.

"Oh and if you had bothered to _read_ it, you'd know that you have physical training every day. So you can eventually be out in the action. I'd get a move on that if I were you." He raises an eyebrow.

I pause, then shrug.

"Okay."

"Good." He replies.

Turning on my heel, I walk away down the hall.

Fine. I'll get to training tomorrow, but right now I'm going to see Peeta. Maybe they'll allow me stay the night this time?

I knock quietly at the door to his new room. They moved him to a more permanent and larger room the day after I left. For his sake I'm glad it's certainly more comfortable than the other one.

"C'm in," Peeta's voice seeps through the wood. I swing the door open and step inside, a grin spreading across my face. The room is a wide rectangle, with a cot in the left corner and two comfortable chairs on the right. A door beside it leads into the bathroom as well as a large table on the opposite side for eating.

"Since when did you smile?" He jokes as approach him.

"Since it's been a horrible day and you've just now made it the best," I reply, leaning over and pressing my lips briefly against his. He returns my grin through the kiss.

"It's late. I thought you weren't coming until tomorrow." He admits, wrapping an arm around my waist as I snuggle up beside him. Thank God this bed is twice the size of the other.

"I couldn't stay away," I smile again up at him. He kisses my forehead, a hand grazing over my cheek.

"Have you been sleeping much?" He asks, his thumb stroking one of the dark circles beneath my eyes.

"You know I never can." I whisper, looking away.

"I'll ask the nurse again if you can stay. Maybe if I keep probing her with the same question she'll break," He shrugs.

"If she's anything like my old one it'll never happen." I mutter.

He sighs. I decide to change the subject.

"How are you doing? Anything fully healed yet?" I ask. They say he'll be ready to leave in a month, but of course I'll take any chance to see him healed and out before then.

"It's slowly happening. My ribs feel better and my cuts don't look as gruesome." He says optimistically, but I can tell that not much has changed.

"They are just... hesitant to let me go. Even within a month," he begins.

"Why?"

"Because... well, did Haymitch tell you about the purpose of our tortures? Snow-he had a bigger plan."

I shake my head.

"No, he hasn't told me anything about that," I say, anger towards Haymitch welling up inside me.

"You see... with torturing me physically and you mentally... he also wanted Thirteen to eventually rescue us."

My eyebrows furrow.

"What do you mean?"

"If he tortured us until you practically lost your mind and my heart could barely pump blood through me, Thirteen would rescue the both of us thinking they had won back the Mockingjay. When I had died in my coma and you had gone insane because of it, Thirteen would have no one to lead the rebellion."

I shift, rolling over to my side in order to face him.

"So you're saying... that Snow had _meant_ to let the rescue team leave with us? Just to have us both be sentenced to doom when we reach Thirteen?"

"Haymitch said that the plan was to purposefully preoccupy you with the issue of me in the coma. You'd hope that I'd might wake up, when I'd just end up dying in my fragile state as Snow had intended. He believed it would ruin Thirteen's original and seemingly only plan to gain favors from the Districts."

I rub my lips together, shaking my head. I'm not sure what to say. How can I be surprised? I'm only thanking God that Snow's plan didn't work. Peeta made it out of the coma alive. And with Snow's tortures and upcoming plans for him, I have no idea how.

"But it doesn't matter now," he whispers, his breath tickling my cheek. I shake my head again, pressing myself close and curling my limbs around him.

"I don't care what they say, I'm not leaving tonight," I say, burying my head in the covers.

He chuckles lightly.

"I don't see how they could move you anyhow, they'd have to pry you off of me."

I smile from my face in the sheets and close my eyes.


	44. Chapter Forty Four: Strength

**Peeta's POV**

Doctor Crawford pokes at my fading purple ribs, muttering to himself in a some strange trance.

"Sir?"

"Uh huh," he scribbles something on his clipboard.

"How am I doing?" I ask hesitantly, watching him order two nurses to check bandages on the slashes I earned on my right leg. Luckily I feel no pain in the other, only the metal contraption strapped to me.

"Sir?" I repeat watching him tap at my fluid bags dripping medication into my veins.

"Um, well. You're a-you're making progress," he nods briefly at me before returning to his work. His hands reach up to my forehead as he feels around.

"You said your headaches have not changed?" He asks, not attempting to hide his concern.

"Yes."

"Is it right here?" His thumb moves over a bump on the edge of my hairline.

I nod.

"Possible concussion. I'll see into it..." he strides over to the nurses, giving them more orders. They depart from the room quickly. He soon turns to follow.

"Dr. Crawford," I call.

"Yes, Mr. Mellark?" He adjusts his glasses.

"Do you think," I swallow, "that I could be let out a few days early?" It's a risky question to ask, especially when the probable answer is a certain "no".

He gives me a pained look, as if not wanting to immediately reply.

"I think... you may have to stay until your scheduled release... if not later," he explains, speeding the last part.

"Oh, okay..." I begin, not sure what else to say. Only that I don't know what I'm going to tell Katniss.

The door swings shut behind him, leaving me only with the beeping sound of the monitor to keep me company. I sigh, resting back on the pillows. My hand rubs over my forehead where my headache has been bothering me.

Possible concussion, screwed up ribs, black and blue skin, painful cuts with oozing puss. I shake my head, suddenly angry at myself for not healing sooner. For worrying everyone. For worrying Katniss.

 _Katniss_. Our relationship still seems to be a dream to me. At times I'm still timid by her mood towards me. Waiting for her to push me away, to remember that her and I are just friends. Nothing more. That once I'm healed she'll go running back to her family and Gale.

It leads me to wonder what will happen when I _do_ get out of this hospital bed. What use will I be to Thirteen? Will President Coin allow me to fight alongside Katniss? Keep her from harm? Or will I be forced to watch on the sidelines?

I've known now for a while now that she's been the pawn in the rebellion. She's the key to ending this, whether she knows it yet or not.

The time spent in the Capital will surely fuel her to fight with more power than I could ever dream of. She may seem uncertain now and mentally weakened from the recent traumatic moments, but when she earns back her strength it will all change. I'm certain this will end.

All of my senses wish for her to come and visit me again. Last night wasn't enough time. I hardly got to say goodbye to her this morning before she slipped out at half past 5. Then the nurses came in and began the daily exam the moment they caught my eyes open.

I peer at the clock above the door. Nobody should bother me till lunch. I'm supposed to be resting. Maybe I could take a walk around the room? My whole body aches to move. To stand and walk and breathe normally again. Maybe I can at least prove to _myself_ that I'm healing.

Reaching up at my face, I unhook the oxygen tube forcing air up my nostrils and then lean down to remove the IVs. Taking in a deep breath of fresh and natural air, I throw back the covers and slide my legs around to the side of the bed. Head slightly pulsing, I tighten my prosthetic before letting my feet of flesh and metal feel the floor. My knuckles whiting as I clutch the bed, wobbling.

 _Come on._

My hands push me away from the steadiness of the bed and I force myself to stand upright. The raspy breathes coming from me overtake my hearing as I find myself growing dizzy, my eyes fixated on that clock.

Move. _Move_. I command.

The moment I take a step forward my knees buckle, black spots dance before my eyes and I collapse. My chin hits the tile and my metal leg follows, clanking against the floor. I moan. A trickle of fresh blood eludes from a stitched up wound on my thigh. I feel it wet my hospital gown. Wincing, I shift myself to sit up straight.

I shake my head, my eyes still resting on the annoying tick of the clock. My fist slams against the bed frame as I cry out.

I'm useless here. Completely useless!

I know I'm keeping Katniss waiting for my release. I know my physical health is definitely not helping her mentally. The better off I am, the better off she is; or so it seems.

Snow's torture connected us. Not only in love, but in something terrifyingly deeper. We are his pawns, turned against him from the beginning when she suggested we down those berries and leave the Capital victorless.

Could it be possible that we both have keys in this revolution? I must have some place beside her. My place to protect the Mockingjay, if she allows me to.

Because that's what her and I do, protect each other. And I'm not helping her by sitting practically lame in the hospital, paralyzed by pain and weakness.

My worst fear is that she may have to do this alone. Not that I don't think she could do it all alone, I know she'd find the strength to, but the thought of me not being there beside her... My brain can't comprehend it. I'm attached to her. She's attached to me. There's no getting around that.

With this in mind, hot tears escape my eyes as I scoot myself closer to the side of the bed, whimpering and groaning like an wounded puppy as I use all the strength left within me to slide into the bed. I don't bother with the tubes and IVs and whatever the hell else. I know someone will find me and hook me up eventually. The pain overtakes me and I can no longer stay awake as I pass out, the last memory of my head slamming into the stark white pillows.

 **A/N: Hey everyone, sorry for such a big hiatus. It's been a bit of a writing block for me lately as well as the business of school. But I'm back now! I have definitely more plans for this story so stay tuned!**

 **Okay, I don't usual talk about Celeb gossip that much, and especially not on FanFic, but our own Katniss Everdeen Jennifer Lawrence is engaged! I heard that her rep confirmed it a couple of days ago. Guess Joshifer is dead *tear drops, but I'm pretty happy for her anyway! Yes, you can read it all on the tabloids if you don't believe me. ;)**


	45. Chapter Forty Five: Train with Finnick

**Katniss's POV**

Pulling my hair into a knot at the nape of my neck, I step out into one of the training rooms, meeting the eyes of at least twenty others. Heat rushes to my cheeks as I feel everyone's gaze upon me. I should be used to this by now, but I'm not. I don't think I ever will be.

I decide to stand in the very back beside Finnick, who is giving me a boyish grin. I return his gesture with a scowl.

"What are you smiling at?" I hiss.

"Just pleased you made it," he replies casually, still maintaining his charming expression.

 _Did nobody really expect me to show up?_

"Well if I want to get out of this hole and out into the action I'd better start shaping up," I snap, rising slightly on my tippietoes to stare over some broad shouldered and tall guy in front of me. A lady enters the room with her arms folded sternly. She wears a slightly more fitted jumpsuit than ours, her face shaped like a tear drop and hair pulled back tightly. Her eyes peer at us in slits.

"Welcome to Thirteen's Training Center. For those of you who have just started, I'm Oroya Solora, your trainer for the next few months. Today we shall pick up with the basics of..." Her smooth voice begins.

"By _hole_ you mean District Thirteen?" Finnick quietly chuckles amidst her instructions.

I ignore him, watching everyone spread out into their places. Copying the positioning, I pick a spot on the floor. We start off with crunches. Much quicker than I expect, sweat breaks out. My muscles soon cramp and ache before our warm up is complete and I've developed a terrible stitch in my side after our start afterwards on the many laps around the room.

Half jogging half walking in the middle-back of the group, I spot Gale sprinting in the front. His hair flies in the wind as he runs, with his head slightly pushed back. I duck my head down, convincing myself not to watch him. I instantly try to avoid him when our warm up is complete, finding Finnick among the small crowd again.

Everyone takes a short break to stretch out before the first unit begins. I am sitting beside Finnick and massaging a sore spot on the back of my shin when we are paired up and given a sheet of crumpling paper.

"This is an extensive workout guideline for your first unit." Oroya explains, placing herself firmly in the center of the room after the papers have been handed out.

"It is meant to build up strength and get you ready for the advanced obstacles coming in unit two. You and your partner's job is to complete the guideline thoroughly, without making any mistakes. Together you both will help one another achieve this goal. It may take only a day of taining to complete, or over the course of weeks. You may begin."

Finnick chuckles to himself.

"Thirteen and their resources. This sheet has probably been recycled since the birth of this place." He carefully hands it over to me.

I try not to sigh as Finnick and I look over the wilted paper. It's a long list of intensive workout combinations, fit with repeated numbers and times to make you horribly tired and fed up in the end. I wish I was as fit as I thought I was. This will surely take more than a few weeks for me.

"Hey, don't worry about it." Finnick assures me, somehow reading my thoughts.

"She said we'd help each other get through it. I know I may not be as good as a partner as Peeta, but we were allies, remember?" He jokes.

I roll my eyes, a half smile on my face.

"We are."

The next few days seem to drain me to the point of exhaustion with following Thirteen's intense schedule. I'm busy the majority of the day with Training, breaking a half an hour for each meal, and then back at it again till Break before curfew. This is when I end up going to see Peeta. I try to stay throughout the night with him when I can, but the rigorous hospital only allows me to visit so much.

Finnick motivates me the best he can during our sessions. We take it slower than the other groups, working on perfecting each excersise the first time before moving on. I have noticed Gale stare at us throughout our exercises, a hint of sadness and longing in his gaze. I ignore him. Until I can get over the guilty fact that we kissed and I haven't told Peeta yet, I won't face him. The feelings for him and Gale seem to jumble up in my mind and tie terrible knots that I can't begin to undo. It's impossible to organize my thoughts on what is considered "this" and "that" in both relationships.

A week has almost past where I find myself unable to sleep. I nearly missed my visiting hours with Peeta twice when Finnick and I strayed late at Training. We are not even half way through the sheet and not even a quarter way to perfecting it. I know it's because of me. If he hadn't gotten paired up with me he'd be probably nearly finished by now. I've suggested twice already that he should go talk to Oroya and have us exchange partners. But he insists that she won't change her mind and that he doesn't care if we're slow anyways.

I braid my my hair hastily as I speed out of my apartment on the way to breakfast one morning when I run into Haymitch on the stairs. He looks me up and down, noticing my crinkled gray jumpsuit, bright flushed cheeks, darkened eyes, and half way weaved tangled hair.

"You look like a nightmare. Have you slept at all this week? Better yet, have you done anything other than work your ass off in the Training rooms?" He folds his arms.

I let go of my hair, letting it tumble back into its messy waves.

"Isn't that what you wanted me to do? Get into shape so I can be the Mockingjay?" I ask defensively.

"Yes, but not miss over two defense meetings with Coin! Where were you yesterday?" He flares up.

I sigh, everything is slipping from my mind at the moment.

"With Peeta."

Haymitch rubs his forehead tiredly, as if remembering my right to visit him during free hours and how this ruins some of his plans.

"I may have to... rearrange your schedule then. Remember though, you have another propo to film this weekend on top of your training and whatever else," he warns, turning to take a step up the stairs.

He turns suddenly.

"Do you need sleeping pills?" He asks, patting a pocket in his pants. I hear some tablets shake inside.

I raise an eyebrow.

"They don't work on me," I admit.

So Haymitch has switched from brandy to popping prescription pills. Clever.

He shrugs, a hint of almost sympathy in his voice.

"Well then Sweetheart, you gonna need to look as fresh as a flower by this weekend or they're gonna throw you right back into the hospital wing where you came from."

I swallow, shoving out a hand. He drops the bottle into my palm.

I'll be trapped in my terrors, it's true. _But... I will get sleep._ I conclude to myself, turning to walk in the opposite direction down the flight of stairs, ignoring the nagging thought in my mind about what Peeta had said to me about the these pills in the past.

 **A/N: Hey everyone! Hope you all are having a good week! Happy Valentines Day! Spread some love tomorrow! 3**


	46. Chapter Forty Six: Morphine

**Finnick's POV**

Katniss looks at me with an exasperated expression upon her face after finishing her perfect performance on the last stage of the workout.

"You did it. It's over. We did it," he tell her with a grin. I pat her gently on the back as she doubles over to catch her breath.

"Yeah." She replies, shaking her head and blinking a few times like she can't believe we actually got through it all-in two and a half weeks, too.

Throughout these past few days both of our work really has begun to pay off. I see the strength now building within her and even a bit in myself. It's really more of an accomplishment for her though. It's been a realization of what she had really gone through in the Capital when I see how hard she worked to gain everything back. For once today she doesn't even seem that indifferent as she usually does. These past few days her attitude has slightly faltered and I could sense the restlessness, but somehow she maintained to get through it all despite the mental difficulties.

"Great work. I'll see you tomorrow." I give her one last smile, in which she actually returns, and hastily exit the room. I grab a towel from the hooks by the door and pat down my neck, running up the stairs to the Dining Room floor. I promised Annie that I wouldn't be late for lunch this time.

I race into the wide open room filled with circular tables and hard back chairs, the smell of soggy potatoes wafting up my nose. I spot her sitting stiffly in the corner, her hands placed in her lap. Her beautiful auburn waves drape forward slightly as she peers down at her plate.

I approach her carefully and take her hand, giving it a firm kiss.

"I'm here," I tell her as she gazes up at me.

I watch her eyes break from her trance, probably a horrible memory from the Capital, and crinkle as her lips part to grin at me.

"I was just going to start on lunch," she tells me.

"Here, I'll go get my food," I say, patting her shoulder before stepping in line and grabbing a tray.

I return soon, deciding to sit directly across Annie and covering my right hand over her left. She gives me a loving smile before slurping up her soup.

"How is finding a wedding dress coming along?" I ask her gently. Our wedding is only a few days away. Most of the preparations that can possibly be made in Thirteen have been completed. Peeta has agreed happily to bake our wedding cake (if they ever let him out of the hospital and near the kitchens) and there are a few musicians wandering underground who can provide music for the reception. A dress for Annie is really the only thing missing.

"I don't think I'll have one in time..." She begins uncertainly.

"I'm sure we'll figure out something," I assure her. I'll do anything I can to make sure this the most beautiful wedding for her, even with the limitations. Now thinking about wedding clothes, I wonder if any on the refugees from Twelve brought luggage with them. I'm sure someone will have at least a dress for Annie to wear rather than these jumpsuits. That gives me a mental note to ask Katniss if her family has anything.

"Hey, I convinced President Coin to let us outside for a few hours to pick the last of the wildflowers. Then we can have them to decorate the reception hall," I say, tightening my grip on her hand.

Her face lights up.

"Really? Oh, I-I'd love to be outside," she sighs, her eyes fluttering up to the ceiling. The wistful look on her face makes me grin even more. I lean forward to kiss her cheek.

"I know you would." I whisper.

After my lunch with Annie, we agree to meet back at my apartment before I head to the hospital wing for a brief visit with some of my allies. Ever since the victors were rescued I've tried to visit them as much as possible. I know Peeta has plenty of visitors (plus his hours are usually taken up by Katniss) but Johanna knows nobody here except for me and Beetee and the rest of our allies. Besides I've known her for a long time. We met each other right after I watched her first games and practically grew up together as mentors, learning the strange and unpleasant ropes of upper society in the Capital.

Reaching her door in a quiet place behind the main lobby, I knock.

"I'm resting," an annoyed voice reaches me from behind the wood.

"Uhh it's the attractive asshole from Four," I chuckle.

"Oh. C'm in."

I swing open the door to reveal a skinny bald woman with a hospital gown practically hanging off her limbs. She gives me a slightly disgruntled look.

"Hey." She mutters.

"Hey," I reply, pulling up a chair.

"How are you doing?" I ask, leaning back into the chair.

"Alright," she shrugs, avoiding eye contact with me.

"Filling up on morphine?" I ask with a raised eyebrow, staring at the tube jammed into the inside of her elbow.

"You know I can't survive without it," She smirks.

I nod uncertainly, unsure if whether I should address this or not. But it's Johanna. She says and does obnoxious or stupid things sometimes, but she's not stupid. At least, that's the Johanna I knew.

"Johanna..." I begin, shaking my head.

"Are you at least _trying_ to get better?"

She shrugs.

"What do you mean? The doctor says my health is improving and the therapist assures me in almost every session that I'm completely safe. I'm getting positive feedback. Why should I not be trying to get better?" She exclaims sarcastically.

"Because... I don't know. You just don't seem to be trying," I shoot at her. Somehow I can tell. I see it

in Annie, and Katniss sometimes, too. It's the strange trance filled with the utter horror of the past mixed with the hopelessness of never being able to return from it.

"What the hell Finnick? You think I want to be stuck in this restraining hospital room? Eating slop and being examined everday by porn thirsty doctors?!" She suddenly bursts, her eyes wild.

I shake my head in disbelief over her drama.

"They are just trying to help you. They aren't predators. This is always the deal with you, you always have to-"

"I always have to what, Finnick? Complain about things that are _true_?" She breaks into a fit of insane laughter. Startled, I step back.

"So what if they aren't predators? Not like I haven't faced much different during my torture in the Capital. Sorry, I forget you wouldn't understand. You weren't there. But you should somehow understand, with the stuff _you've_ have deal with Snow's plans! You think you were the only one who-"

"Stop! Just stop, okay!" I take in a deep breath, not wanting to hear anymore.

"I'm sorry. I had-I had no idea," I at last begin again, feeling horribly guilty inside and ashamed of my behavior towards her when I knew absolutely nothing. I didn't bother to ask her about her tortures. Or anybody for that matter. Annie told me she was only detained in the cells, nothing more. Hearing from her was all I cared about at the time.

Trying to mend the bond of friendship between us, I walk over and place a hand gently on her shoulder.

"Hey, I'll come back tomorrow if you want. I'm sorry, again." I add.

She shakes her head slightly, a slight smile on her lips.

"It's fine. Just as long as you don't turn into a dic-"

"God, you gotta work on your language." I cut her off abruptly.

"Okay, Saint Finnick." She rolls her eyes.

"Oh, I wouldn't say Saint," I joke with a smirk.

"Just as long as I don't turn into a jerk?" I start again for her.

"I was going to say worst, but that works."

I laugh.

"Alright. See ya Johanna," I walk towards the door.

"Hey, have a good time at the wedding," she calls, almost a hint of sadness in her voice.

"Yeah, you'll be there, right?" I ask.

"If you're dying for my company," she half-grins.

I nod, turning the knob.

"Get better, okay?"


	47. Chapter Forty Seven: Wedding in Thirteen

**Johanna's POV**

I copy everyone and clap to the beat as Finnick and Annie dance around in the circle, their arms wrapped around one another. He stares down at her with so much love and happiness that it makes me want to puke. I hate this. I hate being here. But, I promised him I'd try to get better. So I did, at least as much as I could. Sneaking a little bit of morphine every once in a while can't hurt though. I have some still tucked away in my apartment.

I spy Katniss a few groups of people down from me. Arms folded and leaning against the back of a chair she smiles slightly watching the couple. I know she certainly wasn't like that two days ago. I had just been released from the hospital when I caught her approach Peeta's room, a blank expression, yet her eyes filled with terror. She had seen Twelve that morning. Somehow Coin let her go.

I weave myself between the crowd of gray jumpsuits and approach her. She side glances at me, her body stiffening.

"So you made it to the reception," she shifts from her position, avoiding eye contact with me. I know she thinks I'm just here to shoot some negative comment at her.

"Yeah. Finnick insisted." I force a cold laugh.

She nods.

"Are you gonna dance?" She asks, peering at the groups of people beginning to grab hands and pull one another into the center.

"I'm not into that stuff... you should go," I gesture at her sister Prim spinning happily by herself. She hesitates.

"What Girl on Fire, don't you want to let Snow see you dance?" I smirk at her. It was supposed to sound condescending, but I think she took it a different light because she slowly pushes through the dancing people and takes Prim's hands.

It's hard sometimes for me to try and make her think I hate her, because I really don't. I just don't know how else to warp my feelings. It's a trick I try sometimes with Finnick, too. Though he thinks it's just me being myself. Either way it's a good cover up for me. I can't risk the chance of trying to love anyone else. Her or him.

I'm meant to be alone.

Soon enough it's time to eat the wedding feast, which happens to be slightly better tasting soup and the freshest bread the kitchens have with a side of a small portion of fruit. I find myself squeezed strangely between Haymitch and the bride at a long set of tables pushed together as the food is quickly passed along. The wine hidden deep in Thirteen's storage rooms appears halfway through the meal in which case I am nearly squashed by Haymitch's arm as he grabbles to get any droplet he can have.

"God, thought you switched over to popping pills, Haymitch. And all this time they thought you were sober," I grumble at him, shoving his arm away from me just as his fingers graze the bottle.

"Well, at least I'm not stealing morphine from hospital patients, now am I? Pass the wine please," He says in a frustrated tone. I roll my eyes and drag the bottle over to him.

"Besides, I've had a change in heart," he smirks, gulping down his overflowing glass.

Soon enough the wedding cake arrives. I've never really been "in awe" at any point of time in my life, but today I feel that way at the sight of Peeta's work. The cake towers in three full layers with frosting shaped like the ocean with perfect curves representing the waves as tiny little sea animals dance around within. Curled and brightly orange flowers wrap around the first layer of the cake as tiny seaweed-like vines weaving between the soft pale yellow frosting to represent the sand on the beaches.

I ache to have a bite as Finnick and Annie happily cut into it, both glancing over at Katniss with smiling faces as if to give her their thanks for Peeta's work since he's not here in person.

I watched as her face lit up in a way I haven't seen before in a long time when she saw that cake be brought out. I see a hint of pride in her face now as everyone tastes the beautiful sweetness before them. She's proud of him.

And it hurts. I don't understand why exactly, but it does.

To ease my feelings, I gobble down the cake, happy for once that we have decent food here. The Capital sucked, but they did have excellent meals. As I scoop up the last swirl of dyed blue frosting and stuff it in my mouth, I look up to see Katniss scooting out of her chair and hastily dusting off her jumpsuit before rushing out of the room and out the double doors.

My eyebrows furrow. I turn to Haymitch, who is sloppily setting down his drink. He saw her go, too.

"They're letting 'em out early." He mutters, stabbing his fork in his half-eaten piece of cake.

"She couldn't wait till the party was over?" I answer angrily, slouching in my chair. I didn't realize how attached she was to him until they were thrown into the cells together. I hated watching every second that followed.

"Nah, they don't care," he replies with a smirk, gesturing to my right.

I turn to see Finnick and Annie sharing a deep kiss.

I'm thinking now I'll disappear like Katniss did, too.

 **A/N: So there's my brief deeper look into Johanna's character. Sorry again for another hiatus! I promise that I've got good chapters coming soon!**


	48. Chapter Forty Eight: Blissful Kisses

**Katniss's POV**

 _They're releasing him. There has to be some mistake._ I think as I run up the stairs.

It was probably rude to leave the last of the wedding reception, but luckily I don't think anyone noticed. At least not Finnick or Annie. I'll find something to do to make it up to the both of them. Maybe give Annie another one of my old dresses from the Victory Tour. She wore the flowing green one today.

I practically burst through the double doors of the hospital wing, finding Doctor Crawford and another nurse. They both approach me. Doctor Crawford shakes my hand.

"Miss Everdeen. I'm glad someone informed you about Mr. Mellark's release. I understand this is earlier than intended, but I..." He pauses briefly,

"I thought now would be an appropriate time. His health is steady," he recovers, gesturing down the hallway.

I look his way to finding Peeta being wheeled down the hallway, a sheepish grin on his face. The nurse parks him right in front of me and he immediately attempts to stand.

"I told you I could walk it," he mutters before reaching out to pull me into a tight hug. Slightly stumbling, he steps forward and wraps his arms tightly around me. I press my face firmly to his shoulder, relief and happiness flowing through me as the smell of hospital sheets and simple smelling soap waft up my nose. It's not his usual smell, but I don't care. It's over. He's here, with me, and without anything now to seperate us.

The nurse who wheeled him out hands him a small bag of medication. He has no belongings. Everything he'll need will be waiting for him at his new apartment. While I visited Twelve I was able to bring some things from his Victor's home in order to make his room seem more homey. It wasn't much, he's never had a ton of personal stuff, but I did manage to bring back some cookbooks from the bakery and pictures of his family.

He knows they're dead. He's known since the news came that District Twelve was bombed. And if not more proof that they are gone, he hasn't had anyone visit him in the hospital except for Haymitch, occasionally Finnick, and myself. But he still hasn't seen Twelve. The image of our burned district is much worse than just the mentioning of it, that's what I've learned during my first visit there.

At last Peeta is extracted from the many concerned nurses and doctors and the bright florescent lights of the hospital wing and out into the murky hallways and many staircases of Thirteen. I realize that's not much better, but at least he's free. I can't keep my lips from breaking into a grin as we head up one flight to the apartment units. I grip his arm tightly to keep him steady as he climbs each step, still slightly weak from being out of a bed after so long.

His door is around the corner from my family and mine's, overlooking the great funnel of staircases below us. I unlock his door and push it open from him. Quiet with curiousity, he looks around at his plain bed against the wall followed by his single closet and bathroom in the back.

"I can't believe they let you out early," I say quietly, breaking the silence in the room. He turns to face me.

"Haymitch... he talked to Doctor Crawford. Kind of convinced him that I'd be... more healthy if I wasn't cooped up in the hospital. He finally gave in," he shrugs, picking up the cookbook I had brought him from Twelve.

I raise an eyebrow, but don't say anything. It's strange how Doctor Crawford seemed so keen on keeping him for so long and then suddenly gave in to letting him leave early. He was supposed to be released at the beginning of next week.

"Did you bring these for me?" He asks with a sudden smile, holding out the cookbook and underneath, the herbs book we created together before the second games. I nod.

"But isn't this one yours?" He places the herb book in my hands.

"I... want you to keep it with you, for now." I say, peering down at it.

"I know it's ours and we've worked on it together, but you should hold on to it... I know you don't have a lot from Twelve," I whisper the last part.

I tried to look through the rubble of the bakery to find anything that would remind him remotely of home, but everything was burned up. He doesn't have any personal things other than some family pictures, so I thought this would be a good thing for him to keep. I think our time working on it together made him happy.

"Thank you," He replies, tucking back a strain of my hair. I look up to see confusion and almost pain in his brilliant blue eyes.

"What?" I ask.

He strokes my cheek.

"I'm sorry... just remembering..." he tries to explain.

"No, please don't think about it. I hardly can-" I choke on my words, unable to express my thoughts during that horrible time we both suffered. He eases me with a kiss. It's strong and loving as he holds me tight, the books in his hands pressed tightly against my back. I deepen it until the books clatter onto the floor and Peeta falls back on the bed, one hand clutching the bed rail and the other threaded through my hair under the nape of my neck.

We at last break and I'm breathing hard, but not as much as him. He manages a grin between his heaves.

"Sorry, tires me out easily," he explains.

I grin in return.

"It's okay."

He reaches out and grips my hand.

"I don't understand how I can ever get you to smile," he chuckles. Before I can stop it, I blush. Angry and embarrassed by it, I look away. Peeta just laughs harder. I just shake my head.

"Hey, do you want to come with me to see Finnick and Annie off? The reception is almost over. But, you can stay here if you want to rest," I assure him. I want to make sure he's completely comfortable first.

"Where are they heading off to?" He asks, confused.

"Their new apartment," I answer. It's not much of a honeymoon, getting a couple of days off from Thirteen's scheduled routine, but at least it's something.

I can tell he looks tempted to go, but it's obvious to see he already wants to lie down for a while. He doesn't even get off the medication till sometime next week. I lean forward and kiss his cheek.

"I'll go to see them off so I don't seem rude, but then I'm coming right back, okay?" I say after a small pause. I get off the bed and gather up the books on the floor, fighting the blushing again for some reason. I then place his medicine on the nightstand.

He props himself up with the pillows, keeping the pleasantest face he can on for me. Before I turn to leave, I look over my shoulder and frown at him, not wanting to leave the person I've been separated from on and off since nearly half a year ago.

He shakes his head. "Go, I'll be fine."

I nod and quietly shut the door behind me. Quickly, I speed down the stairs and circle around to find the smaller set of suites lined near the dining hall. There, I find a large group of people cheering and throwing bits of dry rice as Finnick and Annie wave from the threshold of their new home. I spot Haymitch toasting by himself with the last bit of wine in his glass before gulping it down.

I edge near him and pat around my pocket, finding the bottle of pills and pulling it out. I thrust it into his empty hand. He looks at me startled and then down at the pills.

"I don't need them anymore." Relief flooding through me at just the feeling of letting go of that damn bottle. Every sleeping pill I took to get through my time away from him illuminated my horrors in a way I never would have imagined. But I had to get through it. I had to prove to Coin that I could be the Mockingjay and push through my time without Peeta.

"Okay," Haymitch nods, giving me almost a knowing look, before tucking the pills in his pocket.

After one last farewell to the happy couple, the crowd of people disperse. Probably wandering off to bed at this point as I realize it's almost eight. I glance down at the purple ink slightly smudged on my arm. Curfew's in an hour and a half. I try to hide a smile as I hurry back up the stairs to Peeta.

I accidentally bump into Johanna as I turn the corner. She is leaning over the side railing, peering down at the spiraling stairwell watching the tiny gray people scurry about.

"Sorry," I manage, backing up. Her face seems surprised, not angry as I had expected her to be.

She shrugs.

"Where are you running off to?" She raises an eyebrow.

"No where," I reply, edging around her.

When did she become so inquisitive about my whereabouts?

She shakes her head.

"I'm not trying to be a bitch, if that's what you're thinking," she explains, releasing her grip from the rail. After a pause, I say,

"But you usually are."

She sighs, slightly rolling her eyes at me.

"Hey, I'm trying not to be like that anymore-even if I _do_ dislike you," she quickly adds, covering it with a half smile.

"Okay," I say giving her a look. Her face slightly tinges with red. My eyebrows furrow and walk past her, down the hallway.

I don't understand what that was all about. Why try to be nice to me now? Maybe the Capital changed her, is all I can assume. Or maybe not. Maybe she's just trying to get me to let my guard down so she can attack me in some way. I don't think it's above Johanna to trick and then humiliate somebody she hates.

I duck my head through Peeta's door when I reach his room. I grin when I see him sitting upright, reading through our herbs book. His fingers graze over a dry dandelion flattened between two pieces of paper.

"I'll come tonight," I whisper to him. His blue eyes flutter up. His face lights up at the sight of me.

"Okay," he says. My heart flutters strangely. I breathe in and nod, shutting the door.

I find Prim laying on one of the two beds, her eyes fighting to stay open as she stares at the plain wall in front of her. She's still wearing her nursing outfit and her hair is held in a tight bun. I hear the distant hums of water coming from the bathroom and I assume mother's in the shower. I approach my sister quietly and seat myself beside her.

"Hey you, doing okay?" I ask tenderly, reaching up to stroke her head. Her eyes flicker to me and she nods.

"Yes, I'm fine."

"You should get some sleep." I smile down at her. I know she's been working long, hard hours in the hospital wing while studying on top of that to become a doctor. I'm so proud of her.

"I was waiting for you," she tells me quietly.

"Oh..." I falter, thinking about my original plans to spend the night with Peeta. I swallow, realizing I'll have to choose.

"I mean I was just waiting for you to come by the apartment before you went over _there_."

Oh, so she already knows my "secret." I've got to stop forgetting that's she's not really a child anymore. She catches onto things quickly.

A smirk creeps up her face.

"It's okay, Katniss. I'll distract mom for you," she offers. I roll my eyes at her.

"Thanks. I doubt she won't ask questions though. I should probably wait until she falls asleep." I say right as the sound of the shower abruptly shuts off.

Prim's eyes widen.

"Quick! Get into bed and I'll turn off the lights. If we pretend we are asleep she'll go to bed now, too." She whispers hastily, running to the outlet by the door. I laugh loudly at her ridiculousness and crawl under the covers.

"Shhh!" She jumps on the bed beside me like a rabbit and burrows her way under the blankets. I see her go still, pretending to be asleep.

Another laugh escapes my mouth and I rest my head on the pillow, shutting my eyes tight. Hilariously, it works. I hear mom's footsteps as she enters the room with the slight dripping of water following. I squint open my left eye to watch as she shakes her head at the two of us, braids her hair, and neatly climbs into bed.

Prim shakes beside me as she tries to suppress her giggles. I sink farther down into bed, wrapping an arm around her. We breathe as quietly as we can, listening for the sounds of our mother's tosses cease as she drifts off. Before she even does, Prim is out cold from hysteria and exhaustion. I pat her blond head as I hear the quiet inhales and exhales.

Soon two people in the room are quiet and still, and I swing my legs over the edge of the bed and creep out of the room. I hope Peeta is still awake at this point, though he could be fast asleep like Prim with the weight of his experience of his first day out of the hospital. But I find him wide awake, still reading our book with his legs tucked under the covers.

"Sorry," I say, shutting the door. "My mom took forever to fall asleep."

He shakes his head.

"No, don't apologize. How is she and Prim by the way?" He asks as I crawl in beside him. I lay my hand on top of his casually as he shuts the book in front of him and rests it on the nightstand.

"They're doing good. Prim helped me get here tonight," I grin, thinking back to our fit of giggles over our mother.

"She did? She knows?" He smiles.

"Yep. She observes," I say as I feel his thumb graze over my knuckles. I take in a deep breath. It's silly, but I can't believe this is actually happening. We've been apart for so long with so many things in the way and now we're free. I can lay beside him and sleep here knowing that just for a little while, him and I are safe and together.

"Katniss..." He begins, taking in my face with his eyes. I feel him stare at every little detail and it makes me fight the redness in my cheeks.

"Tell me about Twelve. I know you went."

I hesitate. It's horrible even remembering it. I don't know how to put it into words for him. I start out slow, describing the landscape from the hovercraft down to every detail of ash. It doesn't take long before a few droplets of tears splash on my hand from his cheeks. Soon we are both sobbing as I end with the crumbling bakery and the image of the main street filled with skeletal bodies trying desperately to escape.

He muffles my sobs as his arms bring me to his chest. I feel him shake against me, making me cry even harder. Our limbs constrict tightly around one another as we seem to wade in our sea of sorrow, with only the comfort of each other to keep us from drowning. At last I look up at him, taking my fingers to wipe away the stains on his face as he returns the same to me.

"We will get through this. We will," he whispers in my ear as I rest my head on his chest, hearing the soft thumping of his heart. All I can seem to do is nod. His lips press against my hairline, then both of my cheeks, then my lips. I breathe heavily as he moves along my jaw and down to my neck, allowing the bliss of his kisses to send me off on my dreams.

 **Author's Note:**

 **Hey my people, long time no... writing, I guess? Stuff has happened. Stuff has piled up. Really sorry, but I am back! Hoping to be updating more frequently. I'm not looking to abandon this story, so sorry again for the hiatus. Until next time!**

 **avesbellator (yes I changed my username for those who don't know)**


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